⭐ ⭐ ⭐ / ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐

The always surprising M.W. Peppers is back with one of his most outrageous claims to date: the Earth has no moon.

At least not the one we think we see most nights.

What we’re actually seeing, according to Peppers, a former chess player, is an artistic creation projected onto the ionosphere using NASA grade light bulbs by our planet’s governments in attempts to disguise the colonization of our satellite.

An ancient asteroid collision didn’t form our moon: Earth’s missing mass was caused by big construction storing dirt on the dark side of the Earth (the side you can’t see from wherever you are) until it could be brought up to the moon in secret. The moon was once just a small white asteroid not very far away from Earth before the “elite” began colonization, and that increase in lunar mass literally caused the satellite to be pulled closer to the sun (and so further from Earth). When old timers say “back in my day, the moon was a lot closer” Peppers says you should believe them. Additionally, this extra mass is causing super storms here on Earth, stripping sand from its deserts and bamboo from its oceans. These are the causes of global warming.

Humans have been going to the moon since 1936 using Nazi rocket tech, says Peppers, as part of Pres. Roosevelt’s five point plan for the survival of American wealth, while other countries entered into the secret pact in later years out of necessity. It’s the lunar surface that the world’s wealthiest, most elite niche of society call home. They live in giant glass mansions on a moon that is neither gray nor dusty. Instead, it’s man made lush gardens and carefully tended farms.

What’s that you say? How can that be? Surely we’d see it in the night sky, shining green and blue. Enter Peppers.

The old “man in the moon” was just a cheap fake, as those in charge thought nobody would notice the slow lunar greening. But with demand for higher quality consumer telescopes peaking after the release of “Poor Richard’s Heart Attack” the world’s powerful knew they needed a more realistic prop. According to the author, the rumors were true about Bisney: his studio made the moon from 1945 to 1959 until Bisney’s growing dementia caused the movie legend to insist “his” moon “be made of cheese, like all great moons,” leaving the US Government to pursue other avenues.

In the early 1960s, “moonies” and “lunists” (fake moon conspiracy theorists) began disrupting public astronomy gatherings with their songs and speeches. (See Fitzen Spertz’s excellent This Moon Is Our Moon for an in depth examination of those turbulent years.) These controversies were met with scorn by NASA, who chose to mostly ignore the growing call for the agency to make public the results of their latest Apollo missions which had only recently started using rockets instead of the more time-tested hot air balloon. Balloons also suggested man was still decades away from visiting the moon, which, according to Peppers, suited the space agency just fine.

After all, hi tech means a new, equally hi tech model would be required to keep the illusion intact, so NASA was running out of time to come up with something. Our moon was already 20% green by then with its entire dark side lit up and its inhabitants looking to expand onto the light side, leaving NASA no choice but to “land” to squelch rumors. Calling the moon landing filmed in “astronot” Chuck Luke’s garage an “obvious fake,” Peppers presents an oddly specific scenario: odd in that it is so specific and, well, just plain odd as well.

With too many questions, consumer telescopes getting better, the next moon model not ready for another eight months, and Bisney busy filming The Commuter Wore Tennis Shoes, Luke and his crew of “phony balonies” used the fog machine and the flag from that movie to “perpetrate a hoax on the whole of the world.”

Hoping a televised landing would silence the press and lay to rest any “moonsense” about people living off-planet, NASA beamed “that awful crap to every American with a tv set.” Peppers goes on to say the world’s privileged are hoarding resources up there; the moon is already colonized, and those in charge are only allowing the rich access. The dark side is filling up, he says, and Earth’s tides are actually the result of nuclear experiments carried out on the lunar surface: experiments to try to force the creation of new land masses, as transporting earth from Earth is getting too expensive even for these made in the moon billionaires.

Over the past decade Peppers has made it his “duty” to enlighten the rest of us, concluding his partnership with Wisconsin where he served as that state’s social media advisor. His perspective has always been a bit, shall we say skewed, “uncovering” conspiracies concerning big tobacco (Lung Cancer Builds Character), the fast food industry (I Didn’t Order This), and even the famed Nielsen ratings (Don’t You Like To Watch?), always coming from a place of seemingly good intentions. Whether or not you subscribe to his particular style of journalism, you have to admit he’s at least always interesting. That trend continues here in spades.