FILM REVIEWS A-Z (mostly watched since 2024)

I try to avoid spoilers and synopses in my reviews.
lighting, cinematography and score matter as much to me as script and performances- it’s all equally important.
and I like weird movies. always have. for the better part of 40 years I have sought out weird movies. I’m a comic book nerd so I like superhero stuff too, but most of the movies I watch are pre 1980 and a lot of them are foreign.
I also watch a looooooot of ’70s movies. I have a high tolerance for schlock, especially horror schlock from the ’70s, foreign and domestic. I can forgive a multitude of sins if a movie is entertaining.
the worst thing a movie can be is not cheap or offensive: the worst thing a movie can be is lazy.
having said that, I do not seek out “extreme” films. I do seek out films that sound interesting. however, when you watch as much ’70s exploitation/horror etc as I do, you’re bound to see a few things you’ll wish you hadn’t.
I love Polanski, Cronenberg, Hitchcock and Spielberg but I also love Milligan, Brownrigg, Wood and Adamson. I love arthouse movies too so take all this with a few grains of salt.

FILMS A-Z

(mostly watched since 2024)

1 awful – 2 pretty bad – 3 good – 4 excellent – 5 vital

#

5 bambole per la luna d’agosto/Five Dolls For An August Moon 1970
Mario Bava directed mystery long on style but short on substance looks wonderful with great color and gorgeous women. some nice touches but not his best work as it’s also fairly dull with inappropriate music. yawn. 2/5
6 donne per l’assessino aka Blood and Black Lace 1964
(dubbed VCI version) with a highly stylized opening, you know you’re in for a treat watching the master play with light, sound and color. Bava’s violent tale of murdered models is technicolor eye candy with great sets, striking images and a fine score. delectable. 3.5/5
13 Frightened Girls 1963
William Castle cold war job that’s more goofy than suspenseful has terrific color and a game cast but is too forced and silly to work. Kathy Dunn is fine in a Hayley Mills role but not only is the film’s basic premise preposterous its execution is as well. misdirected with a shamelessly misleading title, it may be passable fare for preteens. 2.5/5
28 minuti per 3 milioni di dollori/28 Minutes For 3 Million Dollars 1967
(quality dub) Italian heist job with a light hearted approach sees an assembled team try to steal a diamond. said breeziness means no tension or thrills but it’s at least competently shot with attractive women and a groovy score. 2.5/5

A

A 008 Operazione sterminio/008: Operation Exterminate 1965
(bland, stuttery print but quality dub) Egyptian/Italian flick about super spies chasing a radar device or something. playing like a too serious spoof, it’s mostly hit or miss but fairly well made fluff. our heroes aren’t very good at what they do, more or less blundering their way from start to finish, but it’s an agreeable if imperfectly paced blundering. featuring the deadly rubber ovenmitt glove, a surreal niteclub performance, an oddly quiet fall off a tower and of course Ingrid Schoeller. 2.5/5 ymmv
Across 110th Street 1972
hard hitting crime drama about cops looking for crooks who stole from rival forces in a gang war. there’s an excellent score, the great cast does well and the film manages a very authentic sense of place in part due to extensive locations and good photography. with Anthony Quinn, Yaphet Kotto, Antonio Fargas and more. 3/5
Act of the Heart 1970
Donald Sutherland and Genevieve Bujold star as a monk and a young choral singer in this odd Canadian drama. she’s a bit of a wackadoo who’s a little too devout in her pursuit of god. the print I watched was very dark which conformed nicely to the more dreamlike and haunting sequences. the film is low key and very strange; the two leads are excellent together. Sutherland smiles a lot while Bujold is opaque yet convincing. 3/5
Ad ogni costo aka Grand Slam 1967
(dubbed) international production sees Edward G. Robinson and some poor greenscreen assemble a gang of specialists for a big heist. plenty of flavor with a globetrotting story but like all crime caper films there’s a long windup and here the rest is too little too late. with Janet Leigh, Klaus Kinski etc. 2.5/5
A hierro muere aka Kill and Be Killed 1962
a recently paroled nurse goes to work for a rich old lady and falls for the woman’s piano playing nephew. you can guess the rest but Olga Zubarry is her usual adorable self and there are many shadowy scenes in this well filmed thriller. it runs out of steam on its way to an illogical conclusion so a very weak 3/5
A Jolly Bad Fellow aka They All Died Laughing 1964
low budget British black comedy about a scientist who posits extermination as population control/genetic cleansing boasts good leads in Leo McKern and Janet Munro. some broad touches ie a wink-wink sleaziness, a clumsy score and possible cruelty to mice detract. 2.5/5
Akuma ga yondeiru aka Terror in the Streets 1970
a young woman is fired, dumped and evicted for no apparent reason. and then her troubles really begin. Wakako Sakai is good as the beautiful Yuri in this trippy Japanese giallo that plays like a tv movie. there are plenty of surreal sequences and groovy music and it all looks nice with terrific late ’60s color and lighting. almost stylish enough to work, it’s not great but not bad either. 3/5
Alabama’s Ghost 1973
Fredric Hobbs’ trippy low budget stoner food about a wannabe musician/magician who finds his key to success behind a wall at work. creative mix of fantasy and horror has a dreamlike structure and a great lead in Christopher Brooks who seems to be truly enjoying himself. his zest is infectious, carrying the film while (most of) the rest of it is good enough and surprisingly competent considering the limitations. although almost gore free, some of the scenes are genuinely creepy and even well captured if not ideally edited, the assembly line buffet in particular. there’s an outdoor festival, racist ghosts, an awesome sun-glassed villain, something called ?khartoum khaki?, good music, and an amazing car that looked like a Munsters prototype dragster. fun and bizarre. 3/5
The Alien Factor 1977
in Don Dohler’s first feature the music is again the best part but here that’s saying less than usual. couples, romantic or otherwise, are menaced by an outerspace monster so a bunch of locals go looking for him against the advice of McCloud the local sheriff. eventually a scientist shows up but by now there are three aliens. so which is which? it’s easy to keep track if you’re a keen observer: one wears blue jeans, the other looks like a sasquatch on stilts while the third is green and insect-like. or are there four? who cares, this is Maryland’s finest. featuring an amazing bar (and band), Aunt Ruth and her home sweet hospital, a hilarious motorcycle “accident” and future Dohler stars Richard Dyszel and Eleanor Herman (Mayor “Bertie” Wicker and Mary Jane), Don Leifert (Drago, Mr. Longfellow) and Tom Griffith (Sheriff Cinder). 3/5 if you can dig it.
Alison’s Birthday 1979
“who the hell is grandmother Thorne?” after a bizarre opener, things slooooooooooooooooooooow down in this Aussie horror about a teen girl who’s vociferously warned about her nineteenth birthday. not much if anything new but the backyard Stonehenge was great, the score mostly good and the low budget weirdness worked in its favor although the formally dressed cemetery toughs were lame. watching off tubi I thought I heard several audio dropouts sound suspiciously like censored dialog but perhaps not. a very soft 3/5
Al otro ado de espejo/The Other Side of the Mirror 1973
(ninety nine minute Spanish version) Emma Cohen plays a singer haunted to murder by her father’s suicide in this slow moving drama from Jesus Franco. it’s not a short film which makes the inordinate amount of time spent on thoroughly unconvincing “musical performances” that much more perplexing. the hauntings come in the form of mirror reflections and a disembodied voice while the violence is mostly offscreen or bloodless. though I wouldn’t call myself a Franco fan, having only seen a few of his, this one looks good but it’s aimless and beside the (mighty) fine Cohen not at all compelling. whether horror or dark drama, it can’t overcome its glacial pace. 2.5/5
Alucarda, la hija de las tiniebles aka Alucarda aka Innocents From Hell 1977
(faded) strange, dreamlike Mexican horror about a young woman brought to a bizarre convent does some things right but sadly just as much wrong. as for the former, the nuns look like bloody bandage-wrapped mummies, the film boasts good sets, uses its locations well and the two leads are fine even if they look much older than the teens they’re supposed to be. the latter: most everyone overacts, the supporting cast is not wonderful, the “devil” is lame and the “satanic possession” scene is more goofy than terrifying. with shades of “Don’t Deliver Us From Evil” and previous nunsploitation efforts, this one is definitely different if only sporadically effective. lots of blood and screaming. 2.5/5
The Amateur 2025
rote but at least not ridiculous everyman takes on his wife’s killers tale stays grounded to its credit. some exciting setpieces and good photography help as it manages just enough investment to succeed. an ok 3/5
A mulher do desejo (A casa das sombras)/Woman of Desire (House of Shadows) 1975
weird Brazilian movie about a weird uncle and his getting weirder every second nephew is directed by Carlos Hugo Christensen. that it uses loads of if not entirely classical music as its score isn’t of itself an issue; it’s what happens when that terrific music stops playing. it’s typically stagey and a bit clunky but it’s mostly tamely intriguing even as its story is threadbare and nothing new. a generous 3/5
Anchoress 1993
strange film about strange people, the holy shut-ins, here a devout young woman avoiding an arranged marriage. I’m no expert on the practice but the mc didn’t seem quite as isolated as I imagined she would be, becoming a local celebrity and taking on a confessor role. accurate or not, it’s beautifully captured in b+w with a minimum of artifice, indeed reveling in natural light. and grass and dirt and bugs. and strange people, inside and outside of church walls. 3/5
An Eye For An Eye aka The Psychopath 1973
unseemly cheapo about a kids’ tv show host who isn’t so neighborly plays like a tv movie with lots of low budget charm and a minimum of blood. bike riding star Tom Basham looks like a ventriloquist’s dummy or “Mad TV”s Stuart’s bug eyed father so no surprise he turns out to be a wacko. he also doesn’t need to wear a mask to look scary/silly but does use puppets (and found objects) very well. his sit down in the park looked more culty than fun but what do I know, the kids love him. his reaction to chocolate cake was priceless. the score is of the generic, illfitting variety and the dialog is terrific. when a cop tells parents of the year he’ll find their son, mom says, “but soon, please. you don’t know how helpless he is. he’s only five years old. he can’t really take care of himself.” quite poor despite the ending and not amusing enough although the music definitely helps. 1.5/5
Anmonaito no sasayaki wo kiita/I’ve Heard the Ammonite Whisper 1992
odd film “about” a man and his hospitalized sister who reconnect after a long separation. I think. more like a visual poem to time and memory than a coherent story, it offers striking imagery especially in the expansive natural locations. while it has its moments it felt too personal to resonate with me for more than a few moments at a time, almost like someone’s dream incorporated into their autobiography. for me a pretty and mildly compelling 2.5/5, higher if you fall farther under its spell than I did.
Anna aka Mindscape 2013
low rent sci fi thriller about esp and a “memory detective” hired to investigate the mysterious daughter of a rich family. fairly slick but just as shallow, although it is at least vague enough as to not be too disappointing. the mansion while beautiful is underutilized, the memory sequences are neither surreal nor creepy and beside the idea of “remote viewing” nothing else seems futuristic. for a film about memories it isn’t very memorable. 2.5/5
Anna und Elisabeth 1933
sad German drama about a young woman overwhelmed by the possibility that she may have miraculous healing powers. the film raises interesting ideas about the relationship between faith and mind over matter and how believing too strongly in either can be disastrous. while it was effective and Anna’s plight sympathetic, her connection with Elisabeth felt unearned and the latter’s actions in the finale were puzzling. not as troubling was the open ended nature of the film- we the viewer are almost made into converts by deliberate framing and lighting during a crucial scene before our bubble is burst. or was Elisabeth’s easy explanation accurate? directed by Franz Wysbar but without the moody cinematography he became known for. 3/5
The Anniversary 1968
Bette Davis is the mother of all mothers in this scathing comedy drama that’s well written, acted and produced. she’s a rage fueled psychopath who lives to torment her three sons and their respective women so unfortunately it’s also frustrating to watch. if any nasty old monster needed to be put down it’s Davis here. with the lovely Elaine Taylor. 3/5
Anti-Clock 1979
bizarre experiment from Jane Arden about time and perception or something is both boring and interesting but not enough of the latter. it uses lots of video clips akin to channel surfing, psychedelic music and seemingly random narration over random images to disorient but the film seems unwilling or unable to sustain any real engagement beyond the technical. if this is what the mind of the mc is truly like, then better him than me. 2/5
The Appointment 1982
three years ago… and then three years later, this weird and slow cheapfest gets underway with Edward Woodward as the father of an odd child. how slow? sometimes the characters don’t move at all though the camera often moves for them. how weird? the score, at first overblown, soon becomes hair raising even if the imagery is sometimes mundane. the effect can either feel like a noose tightening or be comically experimental. oh yeah and then there’s that poor mechanic and one of cinema’s all time most bizarre car crashes. dreamlike or halfbaked, this can’t decide what it wants to be but somehow I didn’t mind. I guess that’s a compliment. 3/5
Arcana 1972
Giuolo Questi directed weirdness that when successful is mostly due to a good score. a freaky family team of psychic healer mom and wackadoodle son practice fraud and the dark arts. and more. some sections are well filmed; unfortunately other sections are filmed like slice of streetlife for tourists. meanwhile it’s also lurid, perverse and icky- the trifecta of sleaze- and very strange… just not very good. 2/5
Around the World Under the Sea 1965
Lloyd Bridges and David McCallum on a soggy adventure to plant sensors on the ocean floor that’s far from exciting and a bit goofy. the color is mostly good but the film seems like a leftover from the ’50s with soapy tendencies and some specious fx. lots of talking about things and not enough action or even underwater natural beauty. 2.5/5
A Severed Head 1971
British black comedy about a schmuck having an affair whose wife asks for a divorce in order to be with her shrink, who also happens to be his friend. pushes the limits of what is comical and what is preposterously unbelievable as it either pokes fun at stiff lipped, utterly full of shit “adults” or piles on the disgraces. Ian Holm is put upon, meek and squishable Martin who can’t seem to find an ounce of backbone no matter the consequences. the entire cast does well with what they’re given and the film is well shot with excellent color. a few chuckles do not a comedy make however and as a study of the peculiarities of the human heart it’s even less successful since you’ll be past the point of wanting to throttle the lot of them before you can even begin to become invested. if you decide to watch it, better move all the solid objects away from your immediate area or they might break your tv screen when you launch them in frustration. with Lee Remick and Richard Attenborough. 2.5/5
A Step Out Of Line 1971
tv movie about three friends who take illegal action when they find themselves strapped for cash. Peter Falk is Harry, a man with a dying father who goes to great lengths to justify a bank robbery. Vic Morrow is Joe, a recently laid off engineer with a pregnant wife. Peter Lawford is Arthur, a fading photographer who feels time slipping away from a more promising career. like most heist films it takes time to get moving but is fairly tense once it does. some priceless dialog from Falk as he tries to convince Morrow that robbery to save a loved one isn’t a crime, certainly not when rich people don’t pay taxes but blue collar workers do, when factories pollute the air and water etc. with Tom Bosley and a splendid Jo Ann Pflug. 3/5
The Astounding She-Monster 1957
opening with stellar narration, we segue into Earthly narration of the cheapest kind in this no budget z grade bunk. you may think this is one of those movies improv groups or snarky robots ad lib funny lines over until you realize that’s already what this is. some decent attempts at vfx help but the “she-monster” mostly just slowly walks around and the bulk of the movie is dullness about an attempted kidnapping while a weird bear encounter perplexes. terrible overall but this made me laugh: “I prefer to be referred to as an alcoholic.” 1.5/5, the half star only because they made an effort.
The Astrologer 1975
preposterousness about Interzod, ZPs, naked campfire rituals and other rubbish is stuffed with pseudo-science, hidden cats, lousy acting and cheesy computer graphics. half on the cheap and wholly stupid, at least the score is good and the locations varied. while you can rightfully mock it, you can’t accuse it of being lazy. warning: contains gratuitous images of corpses. 2/5
The Astrologer 1976
this wtf narrated potluck stupidity about the rise and fall of a psychic dude and sailing and urinals and sleazy restaurants plays like extended tv commercials or matinee preview reels. likely lethal to not just brain cells but to your tv as well, it’s high drama for crap fans and lazy channel surfers that makes less than no sense but is so uninvolving you won’t notice. like a glimpse thru an old fashion catalog, it’s both fascinating and repellent while the “script” and its matching performances are surreal. seemingly cut together by a music loving travel agent on acid, it features one of the best headlines ever: “US navy dumps famous astrologer!” do you completely understand? yes, this mess is hilarious. a diamond hard 3.5/5 for the experience.
Atlantic City 1980
an aging former numbers runner gets another shot at the high life when an easy score falls in his lap. Burt Lancaster and a good cast do well but Sarandon’s doe eyed rube act is too obvious and the script is sometimes clunky. a soft 3/5
Ava 2020
Jessica Chastain is an assassin with family and romantic baggage in this slick but uninvolving actioner. the drama isn’t as compelling as the violence although a lot of the fight scenes are of the manufactured kind. the cast is fine and everything looks good and moves fairly well despite the misguided script. with John Malkovich and Colin Farrel. nothing new but well made at least. 3/5 if you’re in the mood.
Az prijde kocour aka When the Cat Comes aka The Cassandra Cat 1963
comical Czech fantasy that’s both absurd and surreal about a traveling circus/magic show and their sunglasses wearing cat mixes civics, ethics, imagination and conformity into a family friendly psychedelic stew. it uses an array of camera, lighting and sound effects to create some truly inventive and bizarre sequences but some of them overstay their welcome. otoh, Emilia Vasaryova is quite stunning and kitty is very cute. imperfect but fun and definitely more hit than miss. 3/5

B

Bairokêshon aka Bilocation 2013
modest sci fi twister about doppelgangers and their originals who band together is mostly well lit with good color. it also gets confusing as it tries to be too many things (horror, tragedy, love story etc) and so can’t maintain a consistent tone. 2.5/5
The Ballad of Tam Lin 1971
Ava Gardner may be immortal but sadly too much of this film hasn’t aged well, including optical fx and the use of slow motion and still images. set in Ireland, it’s a psychedelic-ey story of a witch and her circle of young friends directed by Roddy McDowall that’s a bit Meyer’s “BTVOTD” and a bit soapy dopey. although it indeed could be labelled horror and mystery, it’s not nearly enough of either of those things and I usually like slow burners. despite the print being a bit faded, locations and photography were good to excellent including a beautiful opening shot thru a giant wall of glass. not bad but recommended for ’70s folk horror completists only. 2.5/5
The Bat 1926
Roland West’s original telling has plenty to like but is slower and far less photographically striking than his 1930 update, “The Bat Whispers.” here The Bat resembles either a devilish imp or a grotesque mockery of Mickey Mouse, depending on how critical you may be. purportedly an influence on Bob Kane, the film is interesting and effective at times but sluggish and visually inferior in comparison to the remake. 2.5/5
The Bat 1959
Vincent Price and Agnes Moorehead star in a mansion mystery about an embezzled fortune and a masked man with bats and claws. there’s a lot to like but more than a little not to as it’s based on a play with a somewhat lighthearted tone that was not to my liking. the house makes for a fine if somewhat limited (and oddly unsecured) setting while the lighting is good for plenty of shadows. overall the film could’ve benefited from some Castle shocks or fewer characters: seems there’s always someone sneaking into or out of the house. a thin 3/5
The Bat Whispers 1930
(widescreen) West’s retelling of his bold cat burglar story uses startling camerawork and great miniatures and sets to offset its overacting and otherwise flat staging. in fact it’s almost like two different movies- one shadowy and fluid, one bland and creaky. definitely recommended for the visual flourishes but you may need a pick me up for the many slow sections. the print I saw didn’t appear to have been restored but the lfe was robust. 3/5
Ba wang quan aka Super Dragon 1972
(faded, inconsistent print) good-doing passerby frees two women kidnapped into prostitution. oh yeah and he’s a good gambler too but psychic or no he’s a one man army, kicking ass while dressed like Fred Astaire. although the fight choreography is very good there’s a looooooooot of it and the film is sometimes broad to the point of goofy. imperfectly paced but still a 3/5
Beatrice Cenci aka The Conspiracy of Torture 1969
(dubbed) grim Lucio Fulci tale of the murder of a sadistic baron in ancient Italy against a backdrop of catholic church brutality and scheming. while some scenes are effective, the film is too dry and rigidly adherent to the sprawling historical drama format to truly come alive. its intentions are also larger than its pedestrian presentation tho the sets and costumes are good. with Adrienne Larussa. a weak 3/5
Bezeten – het gat in de muur aka Obsessions 1968
strange Dutch film about drugged captives, rape, murder and a peeping tom. in this icky marriage of “Rear Window” and “The Sinful Dwarf,” a horny doctor and his girlfriend investigate horrible goings on in the adjacent apartment. not really horror, not really porn and not really good, as a mystery it’s mildly intriguing if incoherent. has a promisingly disturbing setup but loses focus before long. one of the oddest things about this film is the image itself. it has a curious flatness despite any attempted depth in composition and a drained color pallet, making it often resemble postcards or failed 3d. the music is by Bernard Herrmann and too good for this misfire. 2/5
Black Caesar 1973
Fred Williamson stars in this typically over the top example with offensive dialog and loads of violence but so much authenticity it works anyway. detailing the rise of NYC shoeshine boy Tommy to gang lord, it’s got some pacing issues but everything else is solid including a funky score by James Brown. a red painted 3/5
Black Moon 1975
Louis Malle directed surreal oddness about a modern day Alice/Goldilocks is Sven Nykvist shot so at least it’s got that going for it. beside how beautiful it looks it has lots of good points but at least one majorly bad one that I refuse to let taint my appreciation of its deeply superior ilk. nature plays a huge role beyond the terrific locations with creatures real and unreal and the strangeness often becomes comical. engrossing if not satisfying, think of it as Bergman on acid with some highly suspect scenes exceeding his normal predilections (it’s rated R for a reason). with Cathryn Harrison and a silent Joe Dallesandro. a dreamlike 3/5
Black Noon 1971
tv movie about a reverend and his wife who find themselves caught up in a frontier town’s problems is a weird mix of westerns and the supernatural. some effective moments but a few cheesy ones too. an all star cast includes Roy Thinnes, Ray Milland, Yvette Mimieux and more. 3/5
The Black Room 1982
(severely cropped, faded) strange and unpleasant story of a philandering husband and his strange and unpleasant love nest is part horror, part sleaze and part family drama. the plot involves even stranger characters who desire female blood but hold on- who the frig rents out a room like THAT and who the frig would want it?? this is beyond pushing the limits of “horror movie victims do stupid things” yet it’s all weird and intriguing enough to almost work. alternately incompetent and effective, there’s the impression of a dream as the elements come together or dissipate. unnerving sound design, extensive steadicam and obvious voiceovers help sell it but the film doesn’t know when to say when. it also both steals from and foreshadows other titles (“Halloween” and “The Terminator”). definitely different, it’s not good but not too bad either. 2.5/5 ymmv
Blazing Stewardesses 1975
after an “opening” sure to amuse/perplex, we’re “treated” to weird feet stuff but by the seventh or eighth song who knows what’s going on. ski-masked horsemen ride the dusty plains to an old time movie theme, sadly Yvonne De Carlo is on hand, the Ritz brothers eat a submarine sandwich… weren’t there supposed to be stewardesses somewhere? with a budget for an airplane but costumes for only half the crew, very attractive women and shleppy, undeserving men and godawful attempted “humor,” this is surely one of Al’s worst. there’s a step up in some of the songs this time around but a typically ridiculous score. on the microscopically tiny plus side, I counted exactly one laugh and a singing Yvonne actually managed to walk away unscathed. otherwise torturous. 1/5
Blind Date 1984
a fairly great start leads to a disturbing if pointedly bloodless opening scene proper. then it’s off to the hilarity races likely sponsored by sony in this top(less) heavy mix of giallo and sci fi. young mover and shaker bumps his head and, after hearing there’s nothing apparently wrong with his eyes, decides being blind isn’t for him and so opts for an untested brain implant whose installation means permanent blindness. directed, produced and co written by Nico Mastorakis, he may as well have done the music too since it’s as preposterous as everything else. it also manages to be awesome in spots. Joseph Bottoms plays Jonathan, a music/videogame/dentist fan so rich he can afford not only a wall of tv screens but two hairdos in one. he’s also a creepy peeping tom/stalker/metallurgist/vigilante and blithering idiot. a smokin hot Kirstie Alley does fairly well but it’s mostly a lost cause. there are laughs everywhere like Rachel’s “love theme,” terrifying subway thugs, watching a newly blinded man just wander out onto the streets and down to the subway without realizing where he’s going (not to mention drive a car!), the killer’s footwear and that ridiculous music which seems to be coming from both Jonathan’s walkman and part of the soundtrack. some interesting shots as the film is at least competently made and uses its locations fairly well. a clever moment sees Bottoms talking to Alley where their expressions and body language suggest it’s she who is blind. not very good but cheesily entertaining. with Keir Dullea. for the laughs 3/5, otherwise 2/5
Blood Bath 1966
(very decent print off tubi) after a well photographed giallo-ish intro, the low budget surfaces but it’s not a deal breaker since this artsy trashy shocker has surreal moments and a lurid tone. and the beautiful women don’t hurt. think “Bucket of Blood” meets a Mexican vampire movie. oddball mishmash of horror and beachbums works just enough. 2.5/5
Blood Beat 1983
low budget regional about a hunting family and an ancient spirit is weird as hell, one of those instances of amateur hour origins lending a creepy surrealness to the proceedings. of course, powdered orange juice and the girlfriend masturbating during a psychic killing spree is weird enough already. come to think of it, everything about this movie is friggin weird. playing at least a few years before its time, it’s semi competently shot and the electronic portion of the score is great- too bad it wasn’t entirely so. with a few tweaks the film could’ve been much better- as is, it’s trippy, goofy and more engaging than it should be even as it makes no sense. directed by Fabrice-Ange Zaphiratos. an off the wall 3/5
Blood Stalkers 1976
disembodied amateur hour narration and a tvm soundtrack get this shitshow rolling with odd characters popping up everywhere, including inside the protagonists’ car. two couples find redneck trouble when they visit the old family hunting cabin… in the swamps? the idea of transplanting the creepy cabin in the woods to Florida is interesting but mostly beyond the ken of those involved as this is definitely live action “Scooby Doo” at best. plus some red paint and a lil nudity. this wasn’t just filmed in the sunshine state- it looks like it was filmed through a glass of orange juice. or prune juice if the scene was set at night. Cisse Cameron was quite the bombshell but this stinker was never da bomb. despite eventually managing a lurid drive in horror vibe this is crap city. a generous 1.5/5
Bloody Birthday 1981
three creepy little kids born during an eclipse have to kill in this cheapo crap that’s perverse enough to satisfy despite the goofiness. the film is competent at times which makes it that much stranger when it’s laughable, which it most certainly is. it offers surprisingly strong, resourceful, pint sized, gun toting mass murderers, cheesy music, nonsense about astrology and gratuitous nudity ruined by ickiness. while the trio of lil monsters are well cast they are too often cartoonish and the rest of the bunch don’t fare much better. with lots of funerals, dumb cops, a hilarious junkyard car attack, Julie Brown and Jose Ferrer for some reason. laughs galore but ymmv. 3/5
Bluff storia di truffe e di imbroglioni aka The Con Artists aka The Switch 1976
Anthony Quinn co stars in this too broad for me Italian comedy about a prison escapee who has to go back and break out again. very well shot with good color, it’s entertaining enough but I felt like an outsider at a lavish family reunion that went on too long. 2.5/5
The Brides Wore Blood 1972
this is one of those movies I had to keep pausing to scribble notes for fear I’d miss another gem. well meaning and (surprisingly) sporadically effective Florida cheapie about a cursed family or vampires or the occult but the real draw is the attractive women and the sterling presentation. top notch narration, matched only by the writing, direction and cast performances, await anyone foolish enough to waste their time on this Milligan-esque oddity that’s decently filmed and features four of the prettiest, most gullible young women to answer a printed ad since “Terror At Red Wolf Inn.” for the aforementioned viewer, beside a few actual horror-ish moments there are treasures galore: the basement lovers who find a prybar in a bureau, Perro the well dressed Quasimodo (with Moe Howard wig), the psychic who not only looks like your aunt but has the same deck of cards as your aunt (the ones with flowers on the backs) and her reading room which is so sparse because she splurged on that fancy sign, Mr. Delorca the Orlando Carradine, the hairy lettuce monster and much more all captured in that inimitable early ’70s filmstock that for me has become synonymous with schlocky horror. but like most if not all winners of this sort, the talky script saves money but adds tedium and keeps things from really going full tilt. with a decent electronic score. 3/5 if you go for this kind of crap.
Bunco 1977
Donna Mills goes undercover so Robert Urich and Tom Selleck can nab a vicious pimp. she’s definitely the best part of this made for tv buddy cop drama that’s fairly violent yet low on excitement. if it were a pilot it had potential but now it’s mostly to recall lots of period small screen stars. 2.5/5

C

Cage of Evil 1960
unfortunately narrated low budget noir about Scotty, an even tempered policeman, and the thief’s girl he falls for plays like a tv movie but is entertaining enough to not matter. the best laid plans often go astray and our heroes’ make-it-up-as-you-go scheme never had a chance. the often contrived script doesn’t surprise but is just the right mix of goofy and sordid to work. the cast is game if not uniformly talented. 3/5
Call Northside 777 1948
based on the true story of a cop killing in Chicago, this dramatization tells of an innocent man imprisoned. Jimmy Stewart plays a newspaper reporter but instead of cynical imo he’s just a rude jerk. otherwise well written and performed. 3/5
Captain America: Brave New World 2025
Sam Wilson is the new Cap, there’s a new Falcon and a red Hulk and a Manchurian Candidate type thing. also new is Harrison Ford as “Thunderbolt” Ross but despite the newness much of it feels inconsequential. it all looks good even if the chaos doesn’t always make sense. 2.5/5
The Car 1977
James Brolin vehicle about a cop chasing a possessed sedan that’s killing pedestrians when it isn’t creating huge dust clouds speeding around in the desert. or killing pedestrians in the desert. after a great opener this becomes as silly as you’d expect but at least it’s decently made although the “better” it gets the more preposterous it all seems. the horny soundtrack, the sped up footage and the overacting add up to endless snickering. 3/5 for the laughs; otherwise 2/5
The Caretaker akaThe Guest 1963
Robert Shaw, Alan Bates and Donald Pleasence are excellent in Pinter’s psychological drama about a transient caught up with two brothers, one a quiet giant, the other an abrasive trickster. the seemingly endless tonal shifts and power struggles are compelling and often darkly humorous, particularly Pleasence as he displays desperation, belligerence, timidity and more. Shaw brings a calm dignity to his role but along with Bates borders on menacing. not exactly satisfying but 3/5 for the performances and twisty script.
Carnival of Blood 1970
Harry and Clair, a ridiculously unconvincing bickering couple, get things rolling in this cheap but well intentioned hippie-ish gore/laughfest set inside the weirdest sounding carnival ever. seems there’s a psycho killing customers and a host of potential suspects but the useless dialog and ill advised musical cues spoil the fun. poorly directed by porn maven Leonard Kirtman, the man of a thousand pseudonyms who also made the atrocious “Curse of the Headless Horseman,” as stinky as it is it still manages a few actual horror schlock moments with creepy characters and mannequins. genuine highlights include a reluctant psychic in a closet, an awesome drunken sailor, a teddy bear from hell, the lovable “dumpy lady” and Burt Young as Gimpy. it’s undeniably hilarious while just as assuredly lousy through and through but its Milligan-esque weirdness makes it pure gold. for the laughs a rock solid 3.5/5
The Case of the Howling Dog 1934
Warren William as Perry Mason in a less than thrilling mystery. it’s not bad as it manages a bit of that timely charm I was hoping for but it’s not nearly brisk, funny or shadowy enough to recommend. 2.5/5
Catacombs aka The Woman Who Wouldn’t Die 1964
decent if misleadingly titled British thriller about a rich old weirdo and the vultures who want her gone includes Gary Merrill as a creepy uncle. manages a few Castle-ish moments but despite the content this should’ve been a lot more lurid- as is it’s not very suspenseful or spooky although the score helps a bit. meh. 2.5/5
Cat In The Cage 1978
(faded, possibly p+s) Sybil Danning and Coleen Camp spice up this ridiculous crap about a man released from a mental hospital and a friendly cat that’s supposed to be… scary? tough to say who the star of this is, because the “mc” doesn’t get much screen time, but I guess it’s Danning although it should’ve been the cat. shot like some cheap ’80s porno, there’s bad acting, preposterous music, a surreally stupid car chase and terrible dialog. so, basically a laugh riot for those in the know. a few decently lit scenes and seaside locations help (as do the ladies) but this is quite poor. some choice lines: “you were wrong about the meat- he’s all here” and “chauffeur shishkabob.” 2/5 despite the snickers.
Chamber of Horrors 1966
a good cast and solid production values elevate this Hammer-ish thriller over its unfortunate Castle gimmickry. two amateur sleuths who run a wax museum aid local police in tracking down a crazy man seeking revenge against those who apprehended and sentenced him. after a whiz bang opener, there are great sets and plenty of atmosphere, pretty women and an energetic psycho with an assortment of deadly replacement hands. 3/5
The Chant of Jimmie Blacksmith 1978
extremely unpleasant (based on a true) story of imperialism and racial oppression as star Tommy Lewis declares war. Jimmie is an educated, hard working, decent young man whose only “problem” is being part native Aboriginal. with a very violent second half (if largely offscreen) and an equally hard to stomach first, the bad guys are deserving but imo Jimmie chooses a strange time and target to begin his battle. otherwise it’s a terrifically filmed and powerful if manipulative indictment of Australia’s ugly history. 3/5
Chaos 2005
soft, by the numbers crime drama for people who only need hear the names Statham and Snipes to be happy. it barely rises above tv movie level, however, as it’s such cash grab flab it could’ve been directed by a music video producer who never worked with dialog before or made up entirely of cologne ad cutting room floor footage. it barely qualifies as an event to witness let alone remember, being as thoroughly manufactured and preposterous as it is. it’s borderline insulting that anyone thought this was good enough or no one would notice the lack of a script if the trailer was loud enough. plus it’s poorly filmed with just as drab a score. 2/5
Chicken Run: Dawn of the Nugget 2023
the animation is as bright as the story is dark in this belated follow up. I loved the first movie but only liked this one. while there’s plenty of humor and the entire production is typically first rate, Mel Gibson’s vocal presence is sorely missed and overall the magic has been replaced with a curtain lifting agenda. the film is accurate at the expense of captivating but the morality is too simplistic, although probably not from a chicken’s perspective. not every human can live on a small, self sustaining farm. and while admittedly not ideal raising animals to slaughter is not an endeavor practiced only by humans, and I would like to hope my delicious chicken didn’t suffer anywhere on its way to my stomach. let’s not forget chickens eat creatures too, usually while they’re still alive. 3/5 for the technical achievement.
Chikamatsu monogatari/A Story from Chikamatsu 1954
a woman’s lie has unintended consequences in this dialog heavy Japanese drama. the film, especially the outdoor scenes, looks very good in b+w but while the script and performances are affecting it’s akin to a war of attrition. a slow 3/5
Chi l’ha vista morire?/Who Saw Her Die? 1972
(dubbed) fairly stylish but dull international multi language mystery about a young girl’s murder and how it resembles a similar case from years before. good Venice locations, some giallo elements, lots of “spooky” children singing in the soundtrack (which quickly becomes comical) but none of it is enough to make this a worthwhile watch. an hour and a half never felt so long. with George Lazenby and Anita Strindberg. 2/5
Chi ren jing aka Well of Doom 1974
light on martial arts Shaw brothers fare that uses its great sets and locations well is weakened by a talky, sometimes goofy script. an old man’s three daughters come face to face with killers but love finds a way to complicate things. pretty good; you can definitely do worse. 3/5
Chiyari Fuji aka Bloody Spear At Mt. Fuji 1955
oddly scored drama looks at a group of grieving, thieving and drinking travelers encountered by a samurai. the spear takes a long time to get bloody but the kids are cute. despite respecting the overall production I couldn’t recommend this. 2.5/5
Chronopolis 1984
French and Polish gorgeously animated film is uber trippy, featuring floating shapes interacting in and with often creepy places and things. varied techniques are all used very well, evoking both dreamscapes and profundity while the score is evocative if not always appropriate. short and odd. 3/5
Circle Of Power akaBrainwash 1981
(washed out) a company retreat turns into an extreme trial for married couples in this dark, cheap, fantasy thriller. playing like some Euro-sploitation version of “Ten Little Indians” meets “Salo,” there’s violence, weird sadism, humiliation, male nudity and more, all under the guise of self improvement. has a tv movie feel despite the content and the print looked cropped. with Yvette Mimieux somehow. 2.5/5
Citta violenta/Violent City 1970
(108min version) alternately talky and quiet Bronson/Ireland job about a hitman who just wants to blah blah you know the drill. despite all the fast cars and sniper shooting, this is dull dull dull. with Telly Savalas. 2.5/5
The Cool and the Crazy 1958
highschool hoodlums on the smoke act very undude in this cheapo buzzkill with a couple of good songs. obviously written by people who never even smelled pot, it’s a non cautionary tale of delinquent youth and the dangers of that gateway drug, marihuana. apparently the filmmakers confused weed with heroin so unlike Benny you won’t want any more of this “m.” 2/5
The Corpse aka Crucible of Horror 1971
(atrocious print off plex) mom and daughter decide to off dear old dad in this grim and strange British thriller. it’s been done before (and better) plus the ending was either incomprehensible or a lame copout. the garish dark print suited the proceedings and even approached surreal, enhancing the cheap luridness but it wasn’t enough to save this. meh. 2.5/5
The Count of Monte Cristo 1934
small scale telling goes the intertitle route and takes a historical perspective to its detriment. this version gets off to a slow start and yet at under two hours somehow finds time for Napoleonic reenactments. some good sets and some shadows but ultimately dialog driven and less than thrilling. plus I didn’t care for the pronunciation of “don-tays” as “dan-tays.” 2.5/5
Covjek koga treba ubiti/The Man To Kill 1979
Yugoslavian historical horror fantasy tells of the power struggle after the death of tsar Peter the third. Farfa, a minion of hell, travels thru a Montenegro where catholic priests are depicted as bloodthirsty ghouls in black, urging others to kill and shouting for duels as he attempts to trick the populace into accepting him as their leader. features a variety of cool lighting effects and sets including a Bosch-like hell complete with Ken Russell-level dedication to props. interesting and visually engaging. 3/5
Crash 1996
if you’ve ever wondered what a porno made by David Cronenberg would be like, here’s your answer. I for one have never wondered, nor can I say I’m glad to know. James Spader stars as a man recovering from an auto accident who discovers a whole new world. as a mystery/thriller it’s more comically bizarre than suspenseful or intriguing. as an examination of human sexuality, surely those concerned could find a less extreme vehicle. with a very strange Holly Hunter, Rosanna Arquette and Elias Koteas. 2.5/5
Craze 1974
members of the chuku cult are dedicated, you can’t take that from them, especially Jack Palance as an antiquities dealer who’s cuckoo for chuku. or at least for the folk art wooden sculpture of chuku he becomes convinced provides material gains when supplied with blood offerings. pretty poor and while not exactly dull definitely not exciting. with Martin Potter and a great rubber cat yowl. 2/5
Crazy Joe 1974
Peter Boyle is the titular charmer in this lurid NYC based crime drama that’s no fun but the great cast elevates it. details the rise of small fry psycho Joey Gallo to gang lord and while certainly unpleasant the film isn’t boring and looks good. there’s an effort to paint Gallo as more than just an animal but Boyle plays it mostly the same regardless, which isn’t a knock since it suits the character. with a great car off a cliff and a weird ventilator scene. Eli Wallach, Rip Torn etc etc. 3/5
Creature From Black Lake 1976
Jack Elam, Dub Taylor and a foot tappin score star in this hairy ape tale from Louisiana that’s mostly well photographed with good night scenes and use of locations. unfortunately there’s little to no tension, it’s more padded than the creature costume and its attempted humor is painfully unsuccessful. a bigfoot/”Jaws”/”Smokey and the Bandit” cash-in that at least isn’t insulting or lazy, avoid unless you’re a completist or homesick for the bayou. 2/5
Crow Hollow 1952
cheap and chatty but atmospheric and well shot in b+w take on Cinderella doesn’t overstay its welcome. using its locations especially the mansion interiors well, it’s split into two parts perhaps for British television. with the sultry Patricia Owens. an easy 3.5/5 for the shadowy photography.
Crucible of Terror 1971
lurid British cheapie with brash males and pretty females tells of a lunatic artist and other characters you won’t care about. “starring” Christopher Lee knockoff Mike Raven, a few good horror moments and some fine outdoor scenes including a great stoning keep it watchable, however the grating performances from the majority of the cast plus the sluggish pacing are too much for this low rent effort to overcome. 2/5
Cuando acecha la maldad/When Evil Lurks 2023
the rotten ravage a village in this strange demonic folk horror entry filled with unlikable characters being either strident or deplorable. even tho it seemed to be made for tv, coarse, violent and cruel still equals not much to enjoy but at least it mostly moves well and gets pretty gross if that’s your thing. otherwise grim and pointless. 2.5/5
Curse of the Black Widow 1977
ultra cheesy no budget Dan Curtis blub about a deadly female creature who preys mostly on men. typically ineffective mix of comedy and thriller that Curtis championed stretched the limits of even this hardcore lover of ’70s tv movies. with a thoroughly unlikable Tony Franciosa and lots of familiar faces. glacial but the fiery climax adds half a point. 2/5
Curse of the Undead 1959
on the cheap b+w vampire western yarn benefits from an effective score and a good cast including John Hoyt and Edward Binns. not great as the focus isn’t on spooky or suspenseful but it’s got some shadowy scenes to counter the staginess. plus it has the always welcome Kathleen Crowley and the biggest fireplace and logs I’ve ever seen. a mild 3/5

D

Daddy-O 1958
nail biter about a singing trucker who meet cutes a bad driving femme fatale and runs afoul of dope dealers. cheap’n’poor job is competently shot and while often laughably inept manages to entertain with a mostly compelling story and a willing if not always able cast. the “racing scenes” are quite amusing as is the highschool play level interrogation slapdown. maybe I’m just getting old but this wasn’t nearly as awful as its reputation, playing more like a so-so tv episode than a bad movie. plenty of choices but my fave line was “Alright you two. I’ve got a gun on you” coming from the coke-bottle glasses wearing heavy. give it a go daddy-o if you dig harmless fluff like this. 3/5
The Dark Corner 1946
Lucille Ball is good in this noir about Clifton Webb framed for murder. some fine setpieces and plenty of style and atmosphere liven things up but the script is a bit too snazzy. tho the image is often soft there was consistent balance of light and dark in most every frame. indicative of the middling treatment, the museum while impressive was underutilized so despite a lot to like the film’s only a 3/5
Dark Echo 1977
blah American/Eastern European coproduction about a clairvoyant who aids the police in solving some lake drownings. despite a bit of gore and brief nudity it plays like a tv movie with fair to middling use of locations and an effective electronic score. the “terrifying” monster is held off camera for as long as possible and while the film manages a few successfully theatrical moments and a little atmosphere it runs out of steam. 2.5/5
Date With A Kidnapper aka Kidnapped Coed 1976
cheap but fairly well shot grindhouse fare about a bad time had by all is appropriately ugly and grim but too slow and meandering to satisfy any audience. Leslie Rivers plays the least escape minded kidnap victim ever to antihero Jack Canon in a film that even for drive-in sleaze lovers isn’t essential but offers a wealth of schlocky goodness. the director also made “Axe” which was identically half baked, doing a lot right but ultimately too much wrong. this one can’t decide what it wants to be but probably made for a good trailer or highlight reel. some odd music includes “You’re My Little Baked Potater.” 2/5
The Daytrippers 1996
Anne Meara is terrific in this agreeably low key comedy about a woman and her family on a mission. Hope Davis and the deep cast are uniformly good while she is also lovely to look at in between everyone’s wacky dialog and cathartic shouting. it’s a bit obvious and clumsy but still manages to be an affecting little film. 3/5
Dead & Buried 1981
the local shutterbugs don’t take kindly to strangers in this medium budget horror with loads of atmosphere and gleeful gore. James Farentino plays a sheriff investigating murders in a coastal town where Jack Albertson is an odd undertaker. some bad audio dubs and flat filming keep the tvm feel intact despite the content. 3/5
The Deadly Affair 1966
Sidney Lumet spy thriller with James Mason investigating a suicide is too meandering to generate any stakes tho it’s well acted. in an entirely extraneous soapy subplot, Mason is a frigid male married to a nymphomaniac. ooooookay… good sets and locations are plusses and it’s nicely photographed albeit with a muted color palette. from a John Le Carre novel, it’s mostly well made but too long. with a young Lynn Redgrave. 2.5/5
Deadly Strangers 1975
(lousy on tubi, but probably never looked any good to begin with) British cheapie intended for tv despite its sleaziness sees Hayley Mills encounter a charming bunch along the road including an escaped mental patient. frustratingly illogical behavior is par for the course with movies like this as are the cardboard villains. some twists make it fairly watchable but no great shakes. who knew Britain’s motorways were so dangerous? a generous 3/5
Deadpool & Wolverine 2024
gory, f bomb ridden thing isn’t so much a movie as a celebration- of artistic freedom, iconic characters and potential profits. otherwise a well shot and colorful bludgeoning whose success depends on how much over the top violence and fourth wall breaking you can tolerate. sporadically enjoyable but only on its terms, it was still good to finally see a vintage Wolverine with mask and his many brawls with Deadpool were fun. 2.5/5
Deadstream 2022
a viral videomaker plans to livestream a night in a haunted house and it goes as expected. effective blend of spooky and funny has plenty of tense moments, even if the humor sometimes defuses them. maybe I’m getting old but I chose not to turn off all the lights when I started watching this. 3/5
The Death Collector aka Family Enforcer 1976
gritty New Jersey-set low budget tale of a reckless young mob hoodlum making enemies on his way up the ranks works better than it might’ve due to good performances and an appropriate soundtrack. funny and violent drama stars Joe Cortese and an icy Joe Pesci. 3/5
Deathmaster 1972
far out yarn about hippie vampires on the beach is like, real heavy. Korda and his man Friday Barbado make the scene with mystical mumbo jumbo and organic (read: not meat) sustenance. Scooby Doo-ish “thriller” manages some atmosphere with good photography but there’s nary a chill to be found- instead these vampires dance to bongos. amusing in spots and not terrible but not good either. 2.5/5
Death Ship 1980
George Kennedy gets a facefull in this could’ve been tvm cheese buffet about survivors of a shipwreck who find refuge on a haunted ship. this also could’ve been scary or good though does manage a few nicely lit interiors and a very good nighttime topside moment. other than some trippy touches it’s ultimately so goofy you won’t care if it uses “Poseidon Adventure” outtakes and leaves plenty on the table in the form of unanswered questions. I’ll bet the people who saw this when it came out still want their money back. 2/5
Deception 2008
mild mannered accountant finds a new world of sex and danger when he meets a dynamic man and a mysterious woman. mostly tense and well acted thriller stars Ewan McGregor and Hugh Jackman as spider and fly but unless I missed something… what happened to the money? a thin 3/5
Deep End 1970
weird boy gets a job in a gross bath house and falls for a conniving co worker in this bizarre and frustrating British dark comedy. with a different focus this would be anything but funny as it contains some extremely un pc scenes with none more pervy than the gropey girls’ swimming instructor. most everyone is selfish or worse, the mc is a creepy little turd and the object of his obsession is manipulative and cruel. 2.5/5
De lift/The Lift 1983
(dubbed) Dutch weirdness about a killer elevator is unevenly paced but ultimately too much of everything except the horror it should’ve been. the film has its bright spots- some tension, creepy moments, a few well composed shots and an appropriate soundtrack- but family drama and superfluous characters hog runtime. a bit of a sci fi twist makes it overall more good than bad. a soft 3/5
Delirium 1979
Vietnam vet/jogger/car thief Charlie is a wacko of few words but he knows a good murder weapon when he sees one. a secret tribunal of businessmen/social engineers hire thugs to “clean up” their city only to find Charlie a bit more than they bargained for. railroad track war flashbacks add nothing to this half-baked, Lustig-like riff on “Forced Entry”/”The Last Victim” that should’ve ended before the third act. plenty of blood spurting bulletholes, odd music, attractive ladies and cheezy villains, particularly captain baldie (a cross between Robert Duval and William Devane) with his sunglasses, cigar and militaria. a few laughs but otherwise pretty poor. 2/5
Delusion 1981
a young woman goes to work at an old manse to care for a crippled rich man and encounters a cast of characters. it’s mostly well shot with an effective score and makes good use of its settings but is hampered by needless narration and weak supporting performances. with Joseph Cotton. a kind 3/5
The Demon 1979
“Don’t throw your trash in my backyard!” Cameron Mitchell in another one of his ’70s stinkers, this time a South African thriller about a psychic hired to find a missing girl while a killing machine… kills. much of the film is very dark, perhaps intentionally, but either way it’s probably for the best. has an agreeable grimness and a scant few moments approach actual horror/suspense but the script is all over the place. tip: if you work out in the dark you’re likely a sicko murderer. a kind 2/5.
Demoni/Demons 1985
(dubbed) Lamberto Bava tale of a newly renovated movie theater and the private screening that turns out to be unholy. not his best work and certainly not my fave of his. lots of ooey gooey which is fine I guess but what’s not fine is a clever way to build tension proves untenable as the real world of the film becomes less interesting than the onscreen one. not scary, funny or exciting or particularly well directed. with a pop rock soundtrack from all the known offenders of the era. 2/5
Den-en ni shisu aka Pastoral: To Die In The Country 1974
extremely strange fantasy uses surrealism, color tinting, sound effects and more to bring a man’s memories of growing up to life. in segments ranging from humorous to grotesque, this sometimes touching but mostly bizarre meta film seemed unfocused or just far too opaque for me. a well filmed 2.5/5
Denso ningen aka The Secret of the Telegian 1960
(dubbed) Japanese sci fi thriller is decently filmed but not very exciting although it manages an often low key, dreamlike quality which suits the grim tone. men are hunted by someone from their past who uses a machine to transport himself within stabbing distance before running away. a bit silly but not a bad way to fall asleep. 3/5
Der hexer aka The Mysterious Magician aka The Ringer 1964
(dubbed) mostly well filmed krimi about a notorious murderer’s return is way too slow and has too much “humor” to generate let alone sustain any tension. not a total loss plus some stunning ladies including Sophie Hardy and Anneli Sauli. 2.5/5
Der hund von Baskerville 1937
very different telling of the Arthur Conan Doyle story boasts a great castle and foggy moors but the hound is less than terrific and the score is sometimes inadequate. it’s otherwise a fine version if not up to the 1939 Rathbone. a soft 3/5.
Der tod im roten Jaguar/Death In a Red Jaguar 1968
(faded, dubbed) meanwhile, at the hall of justice… Cotton comes to San Francisco searching for a cold blooded, very well paid killer who uses a silencer in this passable German crime yarn. George Nader stars in a multi lingual picture that is set in the US with the FBI I suppose because that way it seemed more like a spy movie to German audiences. there are some good locations but the flat filming does them no favors. there’s a bad guy car that drops tacks onto the road, surveillance toys, a machine gun turreted black van and some poor rear projection. featuring lovely ladies including Susanne Hsiao and Britt Lindberg. 2.5/5
Des teufels bad/The Devil’s Bath 2024
after one hell of an opener, we’re treated to beautiful scenery and an awkward wedding night. make that marriage. a deeply devout young woman living in a repressive, superstitious era finds a unique way to cope with stress. or not so unique as it turns out. movies like this can perplex since most if not all the characters engage in customs and rituals whose strangeness we cannot gauge- are they aberrant or simply archaic? that’s also the case here although the aberrant behavior isn’t too hard to spot. all the elements of horror are present but ultimately the bulk of it is thru the mc’s eyes making this more a character study of a tortured soul. I mostly enjoyed it but felt blindsided by how quickly the mc seemed to slip into madness. while the locations are breathtaking the lighting didn’t rise to the task- perhaps the muted look was intentional. very strange historical horror wasn’t as spooky as I would’ve preferred. 3/5 but ym will almost certainly v.
The Detective 1968
Frank Sinatra stars in an of its time drama about a cop investigating a sex crime that’s burdened by a heavyhanded script and gimmicky camerawork. it’s otherwise very well filmed with good color and lighting. I’ve never cared for Sinatra as a singer but his acting is usually excellent and he brings grit and sincerity here, even if he and co star Lee Remick seem mismatched. the second of three collaborations for Sinatra and director Gordon Douglas. with Jacqueline Bisset, Jack Klugman and more. an imperfect 3/5
De uskyldige/The Innocents 2021
international production sees a family’s relocation afford a girl the chance to make new friends. the young cast is good, the score helps convey a sense of impending dread but disgusting cruelty is simply disgusting no matter how it’s presented and aren’t we past torturing animals in horror movies? the sci fi elements are overshadowed by the simplistic good vs evil characters and major points off for cat abuse, simulated or not. interesting addition to the killer kids genre has style but not much else. 2.5/5 yada etc
Deviation 1971
(dark, bland print) very weird international grindhouse fare by Jose Ramon Larraz about hippies getting their freak on with doobies and murder. a bickering couple strike a pedestrian in a car crash and wind up in a nutty house with a spirit-seeing old cat lady. said house is at the corner of sicko and psycho, whatwith the shocking orgies, the basement and the bloodletting. you know the orgies are shocking because there’s trippy organ and percussion music and same sex stuff. while the film is odd and mildly intriguing, even managing a few shocks and creepy scenes, it focuses on moody mystery to its detriment. 2.5/5
Dick 1999
Kirsten Dunst and Michelle Williams are a riot as two clueless teens who become entangled in the Nixon Watergate scandal. the deep, terrific cast includes Terri Garr, Will Ferrel and Dan Hedaya. silly as can be. 4/5
Die bitteren tranen der Petra von Kant/The Bitter Tears of Petra von Kant 1972
gorgeously shot Rainer Werner Fassbinder drama often seems like a filmed play with long monologues, intricate compositions and creative sound design. Petra is a driven, successful fashion designer who takes a younger beauty under her wing, exposing her aching loneliness and dissatisfaction. despite her rejection of conformity and a supposedly enlightened independence, Petra is prone to histrionics and as superficial as those she disdains. the film has an unflinching perspective, squeezing its characters into fixed poses inside tight camera angles and even tight fitting garments. a bit operatic, it certainly seems German. 3.5/5
Die hai hua aka The Brain Stealers 1968
Shaw brothers sci fi spy job is slow and talky even once it gets going but features Lily Ho, some groovy music and cool sets and gadgets. not good but not too bad if you’re in the mood- it’s colorful and ambitious with decent fights. 2.5/5
Die Sister, Die! 1978
mystery about a terrific family isn’t great or very suspenseful but is well acted with loads of atmosphere and cheesy “flashback” optical fx. a man hires a waitress to take care of his sister in more ways than one as they bicker over the old man’s estate. the strong cast includes Jack Ging, Edith Atwater and Kent Smith. an itch scratching 3/5
Die wand/The Wall 2012
gorgeous natural locations counter the narration format in this story of a woman who finds herself trapped. stuffed with breath taking scenery, for reasons unknown it stops being sci fi and very quickly becomes a farmer’s procedural. you may want to move to Austria but you won’t want to watch this during the flight. major points off for killing an animal but 2.5/5 for the cinematography.
Die wiebchen aka The Females 1970
(!Italian dub!) international weirdness sees a woman visit a bizarre health retreat where murder is on the menu. in the version I watched, highly questionable music lent things an unwelcomely dated, goofy feel when a more appropriate soundtrack would’ve heightened the creepy factor. maybe it was in the original as well- if so, I didn’t care for it, and the high concept horror setup soon turned into a self aware, hippie feminist black comedy anyway. otoh, the film’s lousy with pretty women, groovy fashion, it’s well photographed and mildly interesting if unsatisfying. Adam was great tho. 2/5
Dikaya okhota korolya Stakha/The Savage Hunt of King Stakh 1979
well filmed Russian fantasy sees a young man studying folk legends visit a mysterious village and castle. top notch production design with great sets and lighting carry you through the opacity. 3/5
Doctor Death Seeker of Souls 1973
with a terrifying opening title song, this oddball tale of bringing back the dead and a horndog immortal plays like a perverted tv movie with ghostly apparitions and fantasy sequences. soliloquy prone doc and his henchman Thor are both fashion challenged while their excitingly scored quest is straight out of a Powerpuff Girls episode. this ridiculous crap is like eight movies in one but most aren’t ones you’ll want to watch. scratch that: that beacon of good taste “Blood Sucking Freaks” was possibly “inspired” by this. at least the women are all attractive and good screamers if not always mobile. impossibly mis scored, thankfully unique and laughably entertaining, it’s an experience all right but it’s so stupid you may not want it. 2.5/5
Dogura magura aka Dogra Magra 1988
beautifully filmed, very odd tale of a young man who wakes up in a mental hospital with amnesia. filled with unreliable narrators and a dreamlike structure, the film manages to be creepy and even comical but is mostly sad. the stylized color pallet helps bring to life the past in which it’s set but unfortunately the layered time and perspective shifts are more of an obstacle than an enhancement. 3/5 for the uniqueness and visuals.
Doppelganger aka Journey to the Far Side of the Sun 1969
a probe discovers a planet hiding under our sun’s nose so of course there’s a race to see which country can get there first. if there are people on it, seems to me if our dumb planet found out about them we’re either smarter than they are (yikes) or dumber so best leave well enough alone. an interesting concept became an imperfect, poorly paced film where most of the budget went to excellent models and props but that’s ok: it’s fairly dark, there are trippy sequences and some soapy trash moments too. 2.5/5
The Doorman 2020
rote thriller starts off with a few bangs before becoming superfluous and convenient depicts a decorated marine who finds herself facing off against a gang of violent thieves. mechanical and uses dizzying camera work to make up for its lack of meat on the bone. well made for what it is so not a bad bit of fluff if you’re in the mood for a female Bruce Willis b-actioner. 2.5/5
Dream No Evil 1970
low budget wtf weirdness about a cruelly mistreated orphan girl who grows up to be a cruelly mistreated woman. she falls in with some weird “church people” as she travels trying to find her father. and find him she does. plenty of surreal, oddly creepy moments in this mix of exploitation, horror and fantasy. utterly superfluous narration makes it feel like a psa which is greatly at odds with the histrionics, violence and sleaze. fairly well shot albeit with definite shades of Brownrigg, it’s also a bit “Carnival of Souls” and “The Witch Who Came From the Sea.” how they got so many locals in this is a question probably best not asked. lots of hilarious dialog but my fave has to be “Shirley, your duck is bleeding very badly.” with Brook Mills and Edmond O’Brien. an entertainingly offkilter 3/5
Dr. Satan 1966
(poor print off yt) intense(ly strange) music permeates this Mexican horror/spy/sci fi smashup with the doctor fending off Interpol agents when he’s not invoking his King Devil boss. some creative lighting livens things up but this is fairly weak, playing too much like a boring counterfeiting crime drama as its interesting premise/character is neutered by a timid, misguided treatment. like most of this era’s films, no need for room tone as there’s quite a bit of inherent noise- a restored version might help but it’s not one of director Miguel Morayta’s or the country’s best. 2/5
Dr. Satan y la magia negra/Dr. Satan and the Black Magic 1968
in this superior sequel to “Dr. Satan,” the devil king commands the good doctor return to Earth to stop a Japanese vampire bent on controlling the gold trade. another mishmash of genres, this time the dead henchmen look like gogo dancers, there are killer desks and of course rayguns and fangs. goofy fun but not enough although the trippy assortment of sound fx including rubbery ones to let you know when doc is using his psychic power are amusing. colorful perhaps to its detriment, it still manages a few tasty setpieces especially in the night shots and foggy out of doors. tldr: too much talk, too little black magic. with the lovely Aurora Clavel. 2.5/5
Dune: Part Two 2024
conclusion of the first book in the series sees Paul become Muad’Dib and begin his holy war. director Villenueve does well to embrace the creepy weirdness of the story and the giant sandworms are very impressive. seems to me once again the Baron wasn’t grotesque enough and Rabban is more of an afterthought here but even with two almost three hour movies there’s a lot of book to tell. the score is powerful and the performances are all up to the task. I for one hope the director is given more than just the next installment. 3.5/5

E

Efialtis/Nightmare 1961
b+w Greek proto giallo thriller about a deranged mystery woman out for murderous revenge. a not subtle climax and a bit cheap with very dated music but some effective setpieces and atmospheric lighting help. a diverting 3/5
El ano de la peste/The Year of the Plague 1979
Mexican nightmare scenario sees an outbreak of plague spread thru a poor city while authorities try to play down any dangers amongst rising casualties. despite interesting ideas and some ominous, disturbing setpieces the film is too procedural to generate any real suspense or even drama. warning: contains graphic medical photos of plague victims. 2.5/5
El colegio de la muerte/School of Death 1975
(dubbed) sleazy Spanish gothic boasts a thoroughly distasteful premise and frankly I’m glad the treatment is so pedestrian. often seems like an old Universal horror but it’s way grosser than those. a few well shot sequences and attractive ladies are all you’ll find here other than dullness. a kind 2/5
El extrano amor de los vampiros/Strange Love of the Vampires 1975
(dark and dubbed with audible hum) Emma Cohen is the best thing about this cheap and chatty lump of boobies and plastic fangs that sees a dying woman seek an alternate lifestyle. the locations are nice and it’s mostly well shot- at least the dark print gave it some atmosphere. the score is half good (the goblin-esque half), otherwise it’s all far too stiff to be any fun but probably good to fall asleep to. directed by Leon Klimovsky. (after seeing a much better, original language print I would say skip this unless you’re a diehard fan of Miss Cohen) 2.5/5
El hombre sin rostro/The Man Without A Face 1950
(soft print) a cop with mother issues chases the titular murderer in this mystery with psychological thriller ambitions. not bad but nothing special other than a few surrealistic sets and shadowy scenes. 2.5/5
El ojo del huracan aka In the Eye of the Hurricane 1971
stylish Spanish/Italian mystery about a philandering wife could be called giallo but it’s too slow and soapily scored either way. it’s almost gore free too, instead getting its yuck on in the form of the spearing and butchering of an octopus so points off from me. with little to no suspense or even sleaze, besides the slickness all it’s got are the beautiful Analia Gade and Rosanna Yanni who are almost enough. 2.5/5
El perro aka A Dog Called Vengeance 1977
(awful cropped dubbed off tubi) Jason Miller stars as a prisoner who escapes during transport only to find himself pursued by a relentless guard dog in this Spanish thriller. I suppose the dog represents persecution or one’s past. either way I found this cheap, clunky and tiresome. warning: contains possibly simulated dog fights and their aftermath. directed by Antonio Isasi. 2/5
El pez de los ojos de oro/The Fish With the Eyes of Gold 1974
Spanish giallo about a seizure prone man is quite subpar but the ladies are attractive and it’s decently shot with good color and use of locations. the victims are lame, the violence and “sfx” are mostly offscreen while the engagement is nowhere to be found. try it if you like slo mo runs on the beach and odd looking characters. 2/5
El refugio del miedo/Refuge of Fear 1974
(dubbed, evaporated print) I’m not sure if it’s to its credit that only after almost half an hour did I wonder exactly wtf was going on in this movie. a group of partygoers are stuck in a Bunuel-ish apartment playing billiards, having sex and coming unglued. the low budget-ness suits the unfolding story in all its odd sci fi darkness but it’s hardly riveting. best line: “there’s something wrong with your radio.” a decent 3/5
El vampiro negro/The Black Vampire 1953
almost everyone smokes in this beautifully shot Argentinian take on “M” that’s more multi character drama than horror. as such the tone is a bit wide and the tension sporadic. a terrific sequence under the streets in an almost art deco sewer system touched on expressionism. there are great sets and lighting but also a few poorly staged moments and one badly edited shootout. the myriad of headscratching musical choices were perhaps an effort to soften the darkness but they only disrupt. throw in some politically incorrect policework and the result is imperfect but more good than bad. with the adorable Olga Zubarry. 3/5
El vampiro sangriento/The Bloody Vampire 1962
Morayta written/directed entry does a lot right like its fine sets, costumes and decent lighting. it even approaches horror with shades of exploitation, boasting bizarre sound design and a score that’s like a slowed down trainwreck or ham radio on the fritz. it’s got a vampire of the moon, a Count Frankenhausen and boric acid. it’s just not very exciting, despite the fake bat and slow motion effects. 2.5/5
Emma “puertas oscuras” aka Dark Doors 1974
(faded) Larraz written and directed horror sees teen Emma get hit by a car and never really recover. typically weird effort has some nicely composed shots and an intriguing luridness with the director’s psychological thrills intact. it also manages to be both heavyhanded and underplayed. 2.5/5 seems unfair but ymmv.
The Enchanted 1982
(p+s) weird Florida folk horror boasts moody outdoor shots and a cool synth score but suffers from a low rent script and performances. does a relatively good job setting up its central mystery but the slow pace isn’t helped by the aforementioned acting. worse, the payoff doesn’t satisfy and the final sequence hints at a more interesting next chapter. there are lots of critters, particularly owls and a cute kitten- let’s hope none were injured or worse. not bad slow burner with an effective soundtrack borders on sci fi. 2.5/5
Enemy 2013
stylish Villeneuve directed puzzle sees a professor find his doppelganger in an unknown actor. the ominous treatment keeps things interesting if not exactly lucid and the mc’s actions seemed only to prolong the mystery. with an ending that will baffle or perhaps infuriate, avoid if you like things tied up with a bow. 3/5 for the intrigue.
Enigma para demonios 1975
Brazilian head scratcher sees a young woman who inherits an estate be promptly menaced by ominous phone calls as a satanic cult closes in. low key mystery is a bit heavy handed and stagey at times while the finale is rushed though certainly wild. the score is a bit off, there are too many loose ends as if funding ran out halfway thru and the dingy print didn’t help the under utilized natural locations. directed by Christensen, it’s not bad but not so good either. 2.5/5
Enjeru dasuto/Angel Dust 1994
stylish sci fi thriller about a shrink who helps police stop a subway murderer looks great and with its unusual score distracts from how skimpy it is beneath all the technique. definitely has its moments but a barely there 3/5
En la palma de tu mano/In the Palm of Your Hand 1951
a fraudster psychic develops a fatal attraction to a dangerous client in this noir directed by Roberto Gavaldon. there are nice locations like the great rainy mansion and plenty of dark developments but it’s too melodramatic at its core. out of what I’ve seen of his I’d rank it fourth after “Macario,” “La diosa arrodillada” and “La otra.” 3/5
Escalofrio aka Satan’s Blood 1978
boobs and bush orgy satanism expose plays like a porno no one asked for but earns points for how dark it gets. Franco level sleaze about a young couple who follow strangers back to their home takes too long to become horror despite a creepy doll. the protagonists are bad pet owners but there’s good color and lighting, skull cream and weird food. 2.5/5
Es geschah am hellichten tag/It Happened In Broad Daylight 1958
grim but fascinating story of the hunt for a child killer is well acted and mostly well written. though the characters’ behavior sometimes frustrates, the film creates tension and plenty of distasteful moments. an unpleasant 3/5
Estigma/Stigma 1980
(faded and dubbed) Larraz directed tale of teen Sebastian (or is it Michael?), a freak with serious issues. oh and murderous psychic powers too. his guilt visions were spooky and should’ve played a much larger role in the script but instead, star Christian Borromeo spends most of his screentime being an icky, smirking little creep either pouting, throwing tantrums or trying to bed his mother. there’s something about a past life or ghosts but it’s all so confusing and less than enthralling. however it does manage an eerieness almost in spite of itself and much of the film is moodily shot and moves like a slow giallo horror. fav dubbed line: “it is then that my lip bleeds.” not too bad. 2.5/5
Estratto dagli archivi segreti della polizia di una capitale europea aka Tragic Ceremony 1972
bizarre Italian hippie giallo-ish horror about a group of friends who run out of gas near the mansion of some weirdos and see things that are not too groovy. there are odd edits, lots of handheld camerawork, characters staring ?pensively?, a surreally over the top title ceremony and very good sets and lighting. there’s also a questionable script and middling but enjoyable gore effects. some poetic touches and dreamlike compositions elevate this over its inconsistencies. with Camille Keaton and a bardzo seksowny Irina Demick. very flawed but anything less than 3/5 seems unfair.
Eve of Destruction 1991
after a modestly decent opener, the low budget shapes this sci fi actioner with Gregory Hines as a ?killer colonel? who’s tasked with stopping a runaway robot. poorly made (written, directed, captured, edited) but had it come out a few years earlier would’ve been an enjoyably inferior “Terminator” knockoff. most of the score is ’80s leftovers and some of the sets are good but it’s all too goofy to evoke anything but snickers and giggles. little Timmy must’ve suffered permanent ear damage not to mention a subway full of mommy issues. 2.5/5 for the laughs.
Evil Come Evil Go 1972
ridiculous no budget sleazy crap about a woman on a mission to eradicate evil, mostly of the male variety. “featuring” the most monumentally unerotic “sex scenes” ever filmed (complete with hilarious “dirty talk” and pervy mumbling), crazy musical choices, a wtf ?altar initiation? and more I guess. fully demented nonsense has loads of full frontal nudity, red paint and unrealistic gore but it’s more an excuse for skin’n’raunch than most Euro trash. miss hymn-singing-psycho goes around calling herself “the anti sex lady” dressed like little Bo Peep with a bible, a giant cross around her neck, an accordion and of course a switchblade in her purse! one of the weirdest, weakest excuses for nudie schlock to ever spoil a film reel makes worthless seem desirable by comparison. plenty of laughs but tedious at best despite the theme song. 1.5/5
Evil Dead 2013
inferior remake has its charms like good makeup and Jane Levy but typically dumb characters frustrate. with stylish lighting and gore but none of Raimi’s energy, it’s got pacing issues and not enough chills. 2/5
Eye of the Devil 1966
this beautifully lit British mystery thriller about weird townsfolk and ancient customs boasts a huge cast including Sharon Tate’s first role. the great castle sets are well used and the outdoor scenes look very good; the story is intriguing but it’s a bit contrived and the pace is as uneven as the tone. come for the stars, stay for the photography. with David Niven, Deborah Kerr and Donald Pleasence. an only average 3/5

F

The Falcon and the Co-eds 1943
Tom Conway investigates a suspicious death at a girl’s school. this is my first entry in the Falcon series so I can’t compare but it was fairly brisk with some snappy dialog and a few shadowy scenes. the cast is good but regardless of Conway’s possible appeal I doubt college girls swoon when an older man appears on campus. short and enjoyable. 3/5
The Fantastic Four: First Steps 2025
can our heroes avert planetary destruction? how will they stop the cosmic terror of Galactus? why did I think Reed’s brilliant idea was misguided way before he did? who knew the Thing could grow a beard? finally a good FF movie, only a few decades after Marvel and Mr. Lee thought it could be done. everything looks great, perhaps a tad too great, as in the cgi sometimes draws attention to itself by looking so polished it no longer seems to exist within the world of the film. 3/5
Fantomas 1964
comical action fare about a criminal mastermind who eludes capture with the help of lifelike masks. good sets, locations, color and lighting make this a treat for the eyes while it’s mostly entertaining if a bit silly in spots. and a tad too long. 2.5/5
Fata Morgana 1968
well shot Spanish/German weirdness has striking sequences but just as many superfluous ones too as a model makes her way thru gropey guys after a blind man warns her she will be murdered. meanwhile local residents are being told to evacuate for reasons unexplained. with a jazzy score and the striking duo of Teresa Gimpera and Marianne Benet this one’s easy to watch but difficult to recommend. 2.5/5
Father Brown aka The Detective 1954
Alec Guinness is the titular investigator who wants to solve crimes in order to save souls. despite good performances, very well lit indoor scenes, Joan Greenwood and some humor this isn’t as much fun as it could’ve been. 2.5/5
Fear Is The Key 1972
fear? more like car chases, which unfortunately are not my thing. Barry Newman plays avenger by way of Paul Michael Glaser in a well filmed but hardly exciting crime drama about a badass former diver? I guess. night scenes looked good but some of the underwater shots were poor, not unlike the movie itself. 2/5
Fear No More 1961
a woman boards a train and is promptly framed for murder in this low rent mystery starring Mala Powers and Jacques Bergerac. a decent start ultimately disappoints as the story is derivative, the script filled with exposition instead of increasing suspense and the ending is rushed. think someone ordered Hitchcock and got a Castle knockoff instead. 2.5/5
Fiend 1980
another Dohler no dollar special, this time about a house-hunting, life-force-feeding zombie, with a lot to like and a lot to snicker at. the score is effective but the vfx are not; the script, acting, photography etc are all passable and it’s at least earnestly performed. our fiend may speak formally and offer wine but he is not a good neighbor. fit to bursting with crappy goodness for those with a taste for it. 3/5
The Final Programme 1973
British sci fi fantasy based on the Michael Moorcock novel is too much of everything except what it should’ve been. involves a supercomputer containing the sum of man’s knowledge, an arctic nazi research station, the brains of deceased geniuses wired together as they float in glass tanks and a mansion with deadly security but unlikable characters make it a chore to care. hard to say if the plot is set in the very near future or in some alternate universe but the film seems stuck in the time it was made and unable to truly bring the story to life. it attempts a casual air to the more futuristic elements which, while an effective tact at first, soon becomes aloof and misguided as it glosses over more interesting story aspects, often choosing absurdist comedy (with matching musical cues) and an unwelcome flippancy. the vfx are a mixed bag but the sets and locations fare better. directed by Robert Fuest, there are some things to like but much more to criticize. 2.5/5
The Firechasers 1970
British tv movie starring Chad Everett as an arson investigator is not great and a bit on the cheap but uses its fire damaged locations well. great fun for pyromaniacs, the many conflagrations and buildings burned may feed fixations but surely seeing those vintage toys torched had to hurt! with the smoldering Anjanette Comer. 2.5/5
Flesh For Frankenstein 1973
see review for “Sangue per Dracula” as it’s basically more of the same, although this one came first. just swap out Renfield for Igor etc, the nudity for gore, high camp for ickiness, and unerotic sex for profoundly unerotic sex. again there are good locations and it’s mostly well shot, approaching Hammer at times only way more gross. may have been filmed in 3d but it’s doubtful it would’ve helped. admirably dark but not nearly as fun as its companion and Dallesandro is again a killjoy, here sharing screentime with his butt. yada yada 2/5
Flicka och hyacinter/Girl With Hyacinths 1950
German tragedy about a young woman and the events that led to her suicide suffers due to its flashback structure. with a fine lead in Eva Henning and some very well composed shots it almost overcomes its roster of unlikable characters and sense of futility. hard to recommend so only 2.5/5.
Fog Island 1945
(fuzzy, shaky print off tubi) low budget thriller about a recently paroled man who invites his enemies to his sprawling mansion on, yup, a foggy island. there’s an effective score and creepy tone running thru it all and the often dark sets create loads of atmosphere. grim and good enough. 3/5
Fuego aka Pyro… The Thing Without A Face 1964
(faded) a married engineer falls for a fiery woman who doesn’t want to let him go in this meandering Spanish American thriller. a slick start and charismatic characters give way to an illfitting romance that bogs down as the uneven tone is matched by the score. had they stuck to one mood the film might’ve played better. with Soledad Miranda. 2.5/5
Fukkatsu no hi aka Virus 1980
(the dialog is in many languages but I had no subs) all star international doomsday scenario about extinction level virus MM88 uses its locations well, especially the icy exteriors. the plague is unleashed in a plane crash and we travel the globe meeting victims, doctors and everyone in between as it ravages both animal and human life. despite all the earnestness and some powerful imagery the film is just too sprawling to sustain anything other than mild interest. 2.5/5
Fukushû suru wa ware ni ari aka Vengeance Is Mine 1979
brutally gory film about a real life wacko on the run for multiple murders is extremely unpleasant and difficult to watch, especially at almost two and a half hours. ugly cruelty, no matter how well it’s presented, is still cruel and ugly. like a horror movie sequel that tries to explain how the monster came to be, this was not at all enlightening or engaging or I just wasn’t anywhere near the mood. 2.5/5
Furankenshutain no kaijû: Sanda tai Gaira aka War of the Gargantuas 1966
(dubbed) water logged silliness about gigantic yetis makes the fatal error of showing its poor costumes too often but uses its exteriors very well and has some good miniatures. the print was a bit bland so I can’t criticize the film for inconsistent lighting but I can for the editing, script, goofiness of the overall concept and the aforementioned ridiculous amount of time the gargantua is onscreen walking, running, swimming etc etc. not good but Kumi Mizuno was very pretty. 2/5
Furankenshutain tai Chitei Kaijû Baragon aka Frankenstein vs. Baragon 1965
silly Japanese American production opens with an international flair (as in dialog free) and polite nazis as Frankenstein’s lab is not so politely plundered. the stolen item is then irradiated by the bombing of Hiroshima before oh it’s all too weird to relate. there’s a feral but modest waif, a ?dinosaur?, a hilariously awful “boar,” a painting of Frankfurt, pretty good miniatures but not so good makeup, musical cues and sound fx. a sort of “King King vs. Godzilla” meets atom age “Frankenstein,” it’s well filmed in various locations although the color struck me as more of the late ’50s variety. poor but a smidge better than its sequel which ain’t sayin much. 2/5

G

The Galaxy Invader 1985
Dohler special about Frank and Joe and the green man they keep in his garage. Joe is an awful human while Frank, ever the business man with can of beer and cigarette, is a born leader. filled with Milligan-esque family dynamics and romantic outlooks, the nighttime hunt thru the foggy woods was fairly well done but a typically lame shootout almost ruined it. the rope hogtie sequence was awesome tho and Ethel’s exploration was also good. despite the title nothing is ever explained about our invader but it’s par for this course- my least fav of Don’s so far. 2.5/5
‘Gator Bait 1973
Claudia Jennings is that Cajun wildcat in another Ferd and Beverly Sebastian special, probably their best. this shlicksploitation ripe with all the sordid tropes is fairly well shot and scored, plus it’s got Sam Gilman as Pa, and he’s awesome. all rage and condemnation under caveman hair, he’s judge, jury and executioner. and he carries a whip. gross and leering, the film is so obviously intended to offend that it almost doesn’t. but don’t worry. it still offends. unevenly paced sleazy grindhouse revenger is just what it was intended to be so 3/5
Ghostkeeper 1981
low budget Canadian cold weather horror has that terrific early slasher vibe and a creepy hotel atmosphere as three young people find themselves stranded after one of their snowmobiles breaks down. features typically annoying characters (especially grade-a jackass Marty), bad hair, questionable behavior, weird locals and a freaky ice wall. enjoyably grim if not exactly logical, it’s fairly well photographed tho a bit soft with good handheld camerawork and the score is solid. a not bad 3/5
The Ghost of Dragstrip Hollow 1959
awesome teen hotrodding comedy about a time when girls had slumber parties, raced around in cars they built and danced to songs filled with gunfire. the movie is squaresville even as its dialog is ahead of itself and the kids are just as lame, daddy-o. anything as safe as this may as well have been sponsored by your local car dealer. in between all the dancing, it manages to be preachy and diplomatic while spitting out hep one liners straight from an episode of 1966 “Batman.” tho it’s groovy fun, it never embraces its roots or its spooky setting and so isn’t as much of a blast as it could’ve been. with a game cast, some terrific sets, good to great music and a lousy Alphonso. 3/5
Ghost Ship 1943
needless narration mars an otherwise dark and offbeat tale about a possibly incompetent captain and his ever increasing boldness. produced by Val Lewton, it’s light on shadows tho the film does use the extensive sets quite convincingly. all in all a well done and violent little thriller about struggles for and the misuse of power. 3/5
Girl of the Night 1960
Anne Francis is a call girl in love with a creep and desperate to change her life in this cynical study that gets fairly dark for its time but is also typically melodramatic. she’s terrific, both vulnerable and tough as a woman finding the strength to discover herself but the script is a bit simplistic. 3/5 for Francis.
The Girl On A Motorcycle 1968
(lousy, out of sync) odd and poor British ?drama? starring Marianne Faithfull plays like a spoof one minute, an experimental home movie and severely dated psychedelic softcore the next. that is, when it isn’t being dull/silly. there’s terrible greenscreen, awful narration instead of a script and sequences resembling a vintage Playboy magazine ad for cologne or whiskey come to life. possibly more “mod” in its day, it’s quite the curiosity now. 1.5/5
Girls For Rent aka I Spit On Your Corpse! 1974
another A.A. trash joint of a little quality grass mixed in with the usual stems and seeds features Georgina Spelvin and a gang of female thieves, call girls and killers. stems being frequent lameness, old guys with hot young babes and seeds being a stupid script with dull stretches. Spelvin is fine in the role and looks quite beautiful here and the fight scenes are above average for Al while the attempted humor is typically futile. speaking of laughs, the hilariously varied score includes the unquantifiable, Euro jazz, strip club fodder and a cat jumping on a synthesizer. sleazy, offensive and dumb, it at least moves ok and has a pair of effective (read: vicious) antagonists in a station wagon that goes anywhere and never runs out of gas. 3/5 but ymmv.
Girls Town 1959
Mamie van Doren as Silver Morgan slinks her way thru this soapy trash about a sort of halfway house orphanage for girls that gets a new member in Mamie. she’s good as the tough talkin “wild” girl who’s not so tough- she swoons over young Paul Anka, gets tossed around judo style by rival Vida (who kicks ass!) and cares too much about her fellow girls. the film manages to be the corny kind of preachy yet still work mostly due to van Doren’s sympathetic portrayal and Anka’s sincerity. with Mel Torme as a creepy brute, attempted rape, blackmail, kidnapping and attempted trafficking, lakeside brawls that include pie throwing, a terrific title song and makeout sessions in the park with live singing. the stacked cast includes Elinor Donahue, James Mitchum, Harold Lloyd, Jr and Charles Chaplin, Jr. “You’ll take hash” indeed. 3/5
Glen and Randa 1971
low budget oddity is intermittently effective but more often meandering and poorly acted. a group of stragglers struggle to survive in some distant America in this not too bad but not too good sci fi drama. well intentioned dystopian tale uses its locations very well and is decently filmed with some striking imagery. gets off to a fine start but then becomes bogged down in uninvolving activities. foreshadows “Logan’s Run” and “A Boy and His Dog” but much more lacking (and boring) than either of those. 2.5/5
Godmonster of Indian Flats 1973
old man Fredric had a farm… with an embryo in a barn! Christopher Brooks returns in another Hobbs’ lowball weirdity with a fantastic script and characters that moves nicely, entertaining just as easily. this one has a guy who (let’s hope!) ?dreams? a new species into existence and a rich villain with his own wild western town theme park. oh and Phillip, said rich guy’s “henchman” who couldn’t intimidate a butterfly. he’s one of those “black shirted bastards,” a gang of very organized pistol shootin, horse ridin thugs. a sustenance conscious scientist tries to keep the ?embryo? alive in a tank but the bastards fire gasbombs into his tin shack/laboratory. and all of that and more is as awesome as it sounds. more being the godmonster, of course, which actually looks ok but is not presented well despite being thoroughly eye-gluing. there’s nice Nevadah scenery, a “Little Rascals” type dick sheriff, an amazing bar band, a dog funeral, a terrific landfill, a lassooing frenzy and the best children’s picnic chicken/sheep hybrid attack ever. I’m two for two with this outdoor gathering loving director so far. 3.5/5, possibly higher for the laughs
The Godsend 1980
Angela Pleasence is as weird as ever in this British killer kid horror about a creepy little girl adopted by an unsuspecting couple. and that’s being kind. sure, no one would suspect a curly haired moppet of murder but after not one but three(!) of their children are offed you’d think they might begin to wonder. the beautiful English countryside provides plenty of atmosphere but unfortunately living in denial mom wants to move to the city so there goes that. maybe if there were some hypnotic influence exerted by the weird looking girl to explain the parents’ illogical behavior a lot could be forgiven. as is, not so much. and any supernatural/scifi angle is left unexplored. the film looks a tad soft but has great late ’70s color and some well filmed sequences. horror isn’t supposed to make you laugh out loud though, is it? 2/5
Gone 2012
Amanda Seyfried plays a traumatized woman hunting the man who possibly kidnapped her and her sister. filled with hangdog cops three steps behind, the film doesn’t have the moxy to turn the tables on the viewer even as the potential red herrings are everywhere. the same goes for any real dread or thing out of the ordinary: it’s a cliff notes version of what could’ve been a twisty thriller directed by someone looking to get home to catch the big game on tv. it all has a highly stylized look and moves briskly enough as it surprises no one. that it succeeds even a little is only indicative of how interesting it could’ve been. 2.5/5
Goodbye Again 1961
Anthony Perkins plays a creepy stalker to Ingrid Bergman’s unhappy older woman. the two begin a clumsy affair but the film has little to offer beyond Bergman’s performance which surpasses the script. instead of painting a picture of the potential for growth and happiness at any age it instead seems to say we can be no more than the sum of our mistakes or defined by our naivete. not particularly well photographed and more a primer on the me too movement than an engaging love story. 2.5/5
Goodbye Gemini 1970
very strange, precious, icky and lurid ?drama? about female/male twins Jacki and Julian and the drunks and bores they impact. the ever changing mood and psychological games are fun but the meandering script, forced character intimacy (for the viewer especially) and hyper melodrama overshadow and smother everything. not unlike Julian, whose needs and appetites threaten the decidedly unclean bubble he and sis have constructed around themselves. extrasexual characters, infantilism, reefer and drag queens clash with the dully staged “real world” of the film. some of the tonal shifts are whiplash inducing, the score is often ridiculously inappropriate and the film takes forever to get anywhere, seemingly more intent on being stylish and “daring” than involving or in any way sincere. dark and quirky but offputting and unsatisfying. 2/5
The Gorgon 1963
Cushing and Lee star in a colorful Hammer production about Medusa’s sister that looks too good for its own good. most of the film’s lighting is overly bright which doesn’t add much atmosphere but excellent sets and a solid score go a long way. fun plot catalyst Lee is all pompous bluster. 3/5
Gorod zero/Zerograd aka City Zero 1988
absurd Russian tale of a man just trying to get home from an odd business trip is well made and very funny. the humor and threats of violence (even the mocking thereof) are everywhere as are the bizarre details such as the alternate history museum tour. as to the politics of it all, I’ll focus instead on the terrific sets, lighting and color, the enjoyable pacing and the often hilarious Kafka-esque bureaucracy our hero encounters as well as the uniformly excellent cast. an easy 3.5/5
Gorugo 13/Golgo 13 1973
international Japanese production about a hit man hired to kill an elusive target is filled with tough guys talking tough but not much excitement. several of the cast members seem to be speaking something other than Japanese but they could have spoken in tongues and it wouldn’t have helped. mediocre through and through. starring Ken Takakura. 2.5/5
The Groundstar Conspiracy 1972
after a wild opener, George Peppard is a real dick on uncle Sam’s dime and Michael Sarrazin can’t remember anything. dull and plays like a foul mouthed tv movie with a sometimes silly score and sound fx. 2/5
Gu aka Bewitched 1981
a powerful witch makes a man suffer when he pisses off a woman in this ooey gooey Shaw brothers joint. more like a voodoo procedural than horror, there are many spells, rituals, incantations etc plus the normally yucky body fluids and unfortunately possible animal/reptile cruelty. not bad for what it is. 2.5/5
The Guardian 1990
Friedkin directed pagan horror about a Druid nanny service starts unevenly and stays that way. the lighting is odd but stylishly so, and along with carefully composed shots often approaches surrealism. the nighttime forest scenes are a gorgeous mix of natural and staged elements; indeed, nature itself is very well incorporated and provides welcome menace. plus the baby tree is definitely freaky. now for the bad: illogical behavior abounds, the trio of woods thugs were laughably useless, too much time is spent on the architect’s demise, the casting is curious as are the uneven performances and the script goes too often (or not enough) to the dream sequence well. the score isn’t much of a factor but could’ve greatly enhanced the folk horror aspects. not so good. 2.5/5
Gu zhi se lang aka Fearful Interlude 1975
(lousy dubbed) three tales of horror via the Shaw brothers are a mixed bag but the film is at its best when it doesn’t try to be anything other than what it is: weird, spooky fun. it’s not one of their finest productions as it’s a bit cheap especially in the lighting department but still manages some creepily atmospheric moments like the son burying his mother and the hopping twins. unlike the nudity, the “humor” was entirely unwelcome and it seemed to me one of the characters was offensively depicted but what do I know. a generous 2.5/5

H

The Happiness Cage aka The Mind Snatchers 1972
Christopher Walken stars as a difficult soldier sent to a psychiatric hospital conducting radical brain surgery. dark, cynical and depressing, a good time was not had by all. Walken and most everyone else are presented as entirely unsympathetic despite their individually sympathetic plights. the score is ill fitting and the proceedings unpleasant, mostly due to solid performances across the board. while it’s certainly affecting it’s also something I’d never watch again or recommend. warning: contains possibly simulated displays of animal experimentation. with Ronny Cox. an ugly 3/5
The Happy Thieves 1961
too on the nose comedy about a devil may care thief and the team he assembles to steal a painting. the score tries too hard to sell a mood the acting barely wrings from a mediocre script, including literal “boings” for comic effect. well photographed, the film’s a textbook example of good not great but ymmv. 2.5/5
Hard Contract 1969
James Coburn is a hardened hitman softened by a troubled young beauty (Lee Remick) while on globetrotting assignment. he’s inscrutable by design and she’s not a real, flesh and blood character as much as a plot device. the film isn’t satisfying or involving as the cast have more fun speaking the piddling dialog than the viewer has hearing it. the stars includes Burgess Meredith and a gorgeous Karen Black early on in a small role. too bad she and Remick didn’t make a different movie together while on set. I’d watch the two of them read the phonebook. 2/5
The Haunted Palace 1963
Poe, Lovecraft, Beaumont, Corman, Price, Chaney jr, a great castle, some atmosphere, superstitious villagers… what went wrong? well, it all looks good if not great and Corman’s the master of stretching a budget but even he can’t make this memorable. too many scenes are too brightly lit, it’s filmed a bit flatly and it’s more talk than action. certainly not bad but not very good either. 2.5/5
The Heartbreak Kid 1972
Charles Grodin stars in Elaine May’s painfully funny story of a schmuck who meets his dream girl a smidge too late. co written by Neil Simon, a lot of the humor is of the uncomfortable kind which not coincidentally is where Grodin shines. I’ve always loved the man so for me this was like candy- ymmv. with Cybill Shepherd and Eddie Albert. 3.5/5
The Hidan of Maukbeiangjow aka Invasion of the Girl Snatchers 1973
(rancid print off tubi) atrocious cheapo sub-fluff with a flat dull script, photography and performances at least isn’t funny either so you won’t strain anything if you make the mistake of watching it. this torture test makes dull seem heart pounding by comparison. no one likes a quitter; instead, those involved should never have started. with music from a ’60s teen hicksploitation comedy by a knockoff Jesse Winchester. no. hah? no. hah? no. 1/5
High School Hellcats 1958
gangs in the classrooms! new girl wears slacks! vintage bad girl fare about super cute Joyce being initiated into the Hellcats, whose members live under the thumb of leader Connie and distant number two Dolly. despite the sobering touches, this preachy morality cheapie plays like a good girl’s daydream of more violent gang movies with an understanding, all around dreamboat like Mike to talk to on a blanket at a weird looking beach. touches like Joyce’s distant parents’ barely functioning marriage, dear old dad, gropey guys, covering up a peer’s death and Joyce’s own admission: “I have to belong.” of course it’s all ok in the end. well, after a second teenager dies anyway. with Yvonne Lime. 3/5
Hit! 1973
a batch of bad junk is killing kids and a fed uses victim vigilantism to avenge their deaths and take out the bad guys responsible. lots of French speaking for some reason and the violent first and third acts are very much at odds with the comedic action/buddy flick middle. Billy Dee Williams smiles and low keys it when he isn’t filled with rage and the bumbling hitmen are beyond lame. tedious and the tone is all over the map. if you’re hard up for a ’70s crime drama it’s passable but don’t look for anything resembling engrossing. with a good Richard Pryor and shameless product placement. 2/5
The Hitchhikers 1972
ridiculous and icky low budget exploitation musical tripe about poor pregnant Maggie and the hippie thieves she shacks up with. plenty of babes in skimpy outfits and lousy songs along the lines of “The Hidan of Maukbeiangjow.” practically unwatchable and it’s cruel to boot. with Misty Rowe. 1/5
Holocaust 2000 aka The Chosen 1978
Kirk Douglas and his grin star in this nuclear “Omen” “cash in” that’s enjoyable even tho it pretty much stinks all around except when it sucks. Agostina Belli of course being the sole exception, who was likely chosen not just for her acting ability but for her gorgeousness and riveting eyes (ala Remick) as well. Kirk wants to bring power to the third world but not everyone likes the idea, including his wife who gets a knife to the belly for her troubles. his son Damien Angel (oy) is an androgynous Germanic type, of steely blue eyes and blonde Ken doll hair, so no way is he playing the good son here. in fact, the doc/scientist and new wife Belli are the only decent people to be found. as for the title, I guess they had to name it something. being an international production means everything is inconsistent- lighting, staging, audio, performances etc- but some of it looks very good. speaking of audio, the use of Morricone’s score is often amusing so points for that. seems like someone pitched an “Omen” but with nuclear war and the end result was this, a dull mishmash of everything but that. without an ending. either the money ran out or people were smarter back then. not the people responsible for this, obviously, an agreeably stupid waste of time again except for Belli who’s resplendent and does well considering the “script.” most of the sets were vintage ’70s although the power plant model and lab were cool. 2/5 broken skulls for the laughs and Belli.
Hollywood 90028 1976
over scored and underacted mid budget sleaze-crap about a bad camera man sicko who kills because… he’s a sicko, born and bred. we see the proof in an odd flashback after the first onscreen murder (in the middle of a “sex scene” that played like an alien mating ritual witnessed by humans for the first time). in between the porning and killing, this guy just wants a more comfortable workspace and maybe to take a few strolls or grab a milkshake. maybe harass a tiger. he’s definitely a sicko with layers. of interest may be the vintage nude clubs and sections of Bunker Hill before it was torn down, because there’s precious little else of anything interesting here besides the final shot and Jeannette Hilger. 2/5
The Homecoming 1973
acidic Pinter play about two generations of despicable men who despise each other and the eldest son’s wife who enters the fray. Paul Rogers spits venom like a viper of hate as the cast engages in mind games and power struggles that are often humorous and surreal. the wtf sexual component’s ability to shock and offend depends on whether you assume the story to be darkly realistic or darkly satirical. shades of Monty Python. a very weird 3/5
Homefront 2013
cardboard sketch of good guys and bad guys works due to its cast and a by the numbers efficiency that’s almost unfairly manipulative. it’s reformed/retired/betrayed killer/agent/soldier Statham who just wants etc but the villains are so villainous he has to do what he has to do. plus his daughter is cute/cool. with meth heads James Franco and Winona Ryder. despite plot holes an I wish it weren’t so 3/5
Home Sweet Homicide 1946
a chatty script means a slow pace to this light hearted yarn about a mystery writer’s children who involve themselves in murder. though the young cast is good, the film relies on them to the detriment of the central mystery and oversells their maturity along with any humor therein. on the plus side, there are some shadows and most everyone is likable. a soft 3/5.
Honest Thief 2020
Neeson b-yarn about a good guy safecracker who just wants to turn himself in is certainly slick enough but just as routine. the antihero’s background being revealed is a double edged sword- here it’s nothing as exotic as a secret orphanage where well rounded assassins are made, just good old uncle Sam. if Willa Cather wrote action movies. 2.5/5
Honjin satsujin jiken aka Death At An Old Mansion 1975
beautifully filmed mystery about the double murder of a bride and groom and the convoluted explanation. seems like the film tried to add spooky elements to a locked room puzzle with moderate success. certainly not bad, it’s a bit long and I found it less than satisfying. 2.5/5 ymmv
The Horror at 37,000 Feet! 1973
silly tv movie about Druids on a plane and the bizarre assortment of passengers who go for a ride. manages some decent low budget thrills in between the nasty bickering and gets fairly bonkers as it progresses. the moss and the ?mud? were goofy while the sacrificial doll was beyond weird. who knew planes had elevators back then? or ever for that matter? with Chuck Connors, William Shatner, Russell Johnson and more. for the giggles 3/5
Hot Rod Gang 1958
hotrod Esperanto indeed! speed freaks, rockers and hoodlums make beautiful mouth music in this mostly successful modern screwball. the comedy is speedy but the plot gets in the way, eventually putting the brakes on the fun and stalling out the whole picture. the songs are ok but there are too many fights and not enough dancing though Abigail and Anastasia are great. plenty of classic lines like “you’re a sweet kid. you and your oboe” and “when was the last time you were kicked by a policeman?” but Agatha gets the best ones: “dinner’s ready. it looks pretty awful so you might as well get it over with.” with Gene Vincent. an uneven 3/5
Hot Summer In Barefoot County 1974
(p+s) another Preacherman Corporation joint, this one the familiar tale of a big city policeman investigating moonshiners in a small town. land sakes this leering, groping “comedy” is as awful as I’d imagined but not as rewarding as I’d hoped. the bootleggin daughters were right nice, the score was preposterous and the overall production had that low budget regional look that I crave but its “crowd pleasing” ambitions meant the zaniness took precedence. I don’t know much about backwoods cb banjo movies but maybe this one was influential? otherwise mighty poor. 1.5/5
House of Mortal Sin aka The Confessional 1976
mean spirited vintage British sleaze about a creepy old priest is competently photographed and features a scrumptious Stephanie Beacham but is mostly boring. it’s one of those frustrating mysteries where no one believes the protagonist- there’s little here that’s new, and worse, though the film has all the makings it hasn’t the moxie to truly be wicked. 2.5/5
House Of Terror 1973
(censored p+s) after a mostly great start a wholly unwanted love interest in the form of an am radio storyteller intrudes on star Jennifer Bishop and her new job working for a salt and pepper salesman. she up and moved to make a new start away from Mark but he has plans of his own. this cheapie dabbles in horror but lingers in boredom despite getting it mostly right. the print was agreeably dark while the low budget color, lighting and fair use of locations were countered by ineffective editing and unintentional humor like looped dog snarls, Norma the charmer and the delightful Mrs. Kramer in her blue crypt. not good but not too bad and certainly no worse than many others in the could’ve been a tvm mystery camp. muddled but a few twists help keep things moving. 2.5/5
The Howling 1981
I decided to give this a second look after forty something years and enjoyed it quite a bit this time too. an effective script, great use of beautiful locations, a deep cast and fine score elevate this tale of a reporter who’s drawn into a group of lycanthropes. good if lengthy transformation scenes and goopy gore make this a fun 3/5.

I

Ibun sarutobi sasuke aka Samurai Spy 1965
unevenly paced b+w adventure about a feudal Japan-era samurai in a clan war is talky but creatively photographed. some of the more theatrical fights border on silly but there’s more to like than not overall. no idea if this is one of the stronger genre entries but it’s atmospheric, mostly well lit and the ninja elements and outdoor scenes are good. 2.5/5 ymmv yada etc
Il castello dalle porte di fuoco aka Scream of the Demon Lover 1970
(dub) dull gothic about a castle and a monster and beautiful virgins at least stars Erna Schurer who gets tied naked to a rack a few times. otherwise fairly well filmed but nap inducing. 2.5/5
Il mostro dell’opera/The Monster of the Opera aka Vampire of the Opera 1964
a group of dancers find themselves in a cursed theater ruled by one of the lamest vampires ever. how lame is he? well, he does a lot of yapping in between laughing and snarling and uses gardening tools more than his fangs. Italian b+w cheapie has some atmosphere with shadowy lighting, good sets, a fairly effective score, loads of scantily clad beauties and borderline lesbianism but no chills. it also has a tvm look and feel, lots of dancing and a chatty script. sorely lacking but interesting early example not without a few merits. 2.5/5
Il prato macchiato di rosso aka The Bloodstained Lawn 1973
hippies and transients wind up at the home of a strange woman and a mad(ly bowtied) scientist who have some right leaning views of their countrymen. at first it’s all ice cream cones, romps in the grass and wine from the shower heads. then lots of weird music, weird dancing and a killer robot make things not so groovy. poorly paced and silly sci fi horror doesn’t satisfy by not living up to its potential. with Marina Malfatti and Dominique Boschero. 2.5/5
Il raggio infernale aka Danger!! Death Ray 1967
(dubbed, possibly mistitled on tubi as “Nido de espias”) silly music undermines a cool opening scene but an amazing death ray demonstration more than makes up for it. which pretty much exemplifies this movie- a lot done right but just as much done wrong. Spanish/Italian spy goofiness has style and a budget but no clue what to do with them. Gordon Scott as Bart Fargo has the build for the role but not much more and he somehow manages to look both too old and too young to be a super spy. lots of shootouts with totally convincing fatalities, expertly choreographed action, top notch miniatures, Frank and Gary plus a hilarious hotel room ?fight? and more. harmless fluff doesn’t aim too high while yielding plenty of yuks so 3/5 for what it is.
Il sorriso del grande tentatore aka The Devil Is A Woman aka The Tempter 1974
(washed out, dubbed) Glenda Jackson runs a tight hostel in Damiani’s calculated to offend religious drama that sees her ordered world disrupted by a secular writer. it’s decently filmed if exploitatively written while adding nothing to the genre with music that works half the time (as in, when it isn’t being ridiculous). Lisa Harrow is ravishingly beautiful but there isn’t much else to recommend about this slight wannabe daring potboiler. 2.5/5
I, Madman 1989
a young woman becomes obsessed with an obscure pulp horror writer’s works which begin to intrude into the real world. star Jenny Wright is fine in the role requiring her to inhabit multiple characters but the rest of the cast with the exception of the villain is forgettable. curious mix of fantasy and horror doesn’t straddle the fine line between worlds very well as it’s often played too broadly and while the concept is interesting the film seems more intent on being a theatrical love story. some segments are well filmed and most of the scenes are colorful with good lighting. not bad. 2.5.5
I Married A Monster From Outer Space 1958
mostly well filmed b+w sci fi thriller about murderous aliens and one unfortunate bride plays like cold war paranoia. they wear our bodies like costumes and are much more powerful than us but they wouldn’t make good pet owners and haven’t exactly figured out our emotional component. as for the photography, there are literal day for night scenes, some creepy imagery, decent vfx and fabulous “nighttime” exteriors. Gloria Talbott and Tom Tryon star with a sultry Valerie Allen. 3/5
Impulse 1974
William Shatner plays his psycho killer like a manchild in this lurid shocker filled with rotten kids and terrible adults. see, young Matt Stone killed one of his mother’s most charming suitors and ever since he’s been conning and gigolo-ing in between killing people. hard to say if it’s Shatner or the direction but he’s only moderately effective- seems to me he could’ve been positively chilling in the role. mean spirited and over the top freakshow that’s all one step forward, one step back should satisfy fans of ’70s drive in horror. for what it is 3/5
In A Violent Nature 2024
cheap experimental backwoods horror should’ve been called “It Follows” but the name was taken. unfortunately it’s the viewer who follows, in endless stalker-stalker cam footage as we trail the hulking heap on his horrific quest. with seemingly all the budget spent on his ugly puss makeup, at least only half the film is filled with excruciating “dialog” from the mouths of the most irritating bunch of victim fodder I’ve heard in a long time. not long enough, sadly. I thought I had read good things about this movie and while it did aim for a certain “Jaws” effect of unstoppable killing machine, it forgot the one thing that made us really fear that shark: the score. the kills get increasingly bloody as the film’s true raison d’etre becomes clear: neo ’80s slasher with over the top gore. or, a question of whether it’s the moronic teens or the viewer who’s the victim. some nice scenery anyway. 1.5/5
Independence Day: Resurgence 2016
so who knew they made a sequel? of course it’s cheesy. of course it’s loaded with stars. of course it’s cgi heavy and has to look cool, it’s a sequel to a sfx blockbuster that was just as cheesy. but is it truly entertaining or only mindlessly entertaining? answer: neither. it’s poor, and not simply because it’s cheesy. it’s lazy, beyond formulaic, made up of stirring music designed to create the illusion of poignancy, quick cuts of stars saying trite things with just the right turn of head or wrinkling of brow. it’s children and overgrown adults playing with expensive toys filmed by people who know how to point a camera and others who know how to aim a light. it’s market researched, committee constructed and about as engaging as a piece of turkey stuck between your teeth until you dig it out with your tongue. the tiny piece of meat you wind up swallowing has more flavor and your investment in it a thousandfold higher than in this bit of cinematic bolus. if you like to sit and watch streams of pretty visual sequences that plays like a combination of an army recruitment film, a video game and one of those tv commercials that could be about blood pressure medicine, beer, car insurance or cologne, then have at it. 2/5
Innocent Prey 1984
(end credits say 1988) P.J. Soles stars as an unlucky woman with an insane husband in this insanely implausible Aussie “thriller” that plays like a parody when it stops being dumb long enough to work. it’s cheap, dingy and barely competent but like others from the land down under this one’s got a sickie with energy to spare and he’s the best part. Soles is ok but her ’80s hair is almost as bad as the soap opera horror surrounding it with the exception of Phillip who’s quite wonderful. speaking of soaps, if this had been one from the start it would’ve been a whole lot better for it. with Martin Balsam and an overreliance on music by Brian May. a lousy but riveting near-classic. 3/5
Inseminoid 1981
(stuttery print off tubi) very cheap, gory yarn with shades of “Alien” isn’t good but does enough right that it was probably more enjoyable when it came out. despite being blandly framed there are some decently lit scenes however the best part is the mostly successful electronic score. the script is derivative but a variety of vfx and immersive sound design raise this to slightly above c movie status. 2.5/5
I See You 2019
Helen Hunt stars as a wife and mother whose indiscretion has very unforeseen consequences. stylish yet clunky thriller gets off to a rocky start but keeps the viewer off balance with time jumps, a dynamic score and a roving camera. and therein lies the rub- the elements are so disorienting they can either be a distraction or make it impossible to distinguish weird noises for effect from weird noises in the script. I found the tactic more often effective than not but that’s the least of the film’s problems. I don’t mind when I’m only shown one version of events but the antagonists are wildly unrealistic and the rug can only be pulled out from under us so many times. 3/5 for the style.
Island of Terror 1966
(wan print off tubi) boringly dull yarn sees manmade creatures suck human bones and turn them into spaghetti. the synth freakout noises are amusing but this is as exciting as watching people watch those creatures slowly slide around. literally. and what creatures they are. hopefully a low point in Cushing’s career. 1.5/5
Itim aka The Last Rites of May 1976
Filipino slowburn sees a photographer visiting his father while on assignment get involved in the disappearance of a young woman’s sister. a strange score and disorienting edits combine with a claustrophobic pov and nightmarish flow to bring the chills. the townspeople’s ritualistic chanting and the myriad of religious artifacts and icons soon take on a sinister quality while plenty of dark interiors, well photographed, make for some tense moments but the film’s more mystery than horror at its core. directed by Mike De Leon, an imperfect 3/5
I tre volti della paura aka Black Sabbath 1963
(dubbed API version) those trademark Bava touches are everywhere in this horror trilogy hosted by and co starring Boris Karloff. unfortunately even Bava can’t elevate these lightweight tales to much more than gorgeously atmospheric vignettes, although the old lady’s corpse was quite creepy. seems more like a diversion for the director than anything else, and this version mucked with the narrative of one story. meh. 2.5/5
I vampiri/The Vampires aka Lust of the Vampire 1957
bodies drained of blood are turning up in Paris but everyone speaks Italian in this Bava thriller with syringes and mad scientists. Bava in b+w is still better than most in color even if the material here is a bit clunky and the shadowy visuals are the film’s raison d’etre. there’s great sets and lighting, a cool follow up the stairs, an awesome cemetery and a creepy Margherita. good not great. 3/5
Ivan Vasilevich menyaet professiyu/Ivan Vasilyevich Changes His Profession 1973
silly Russian comedy about a hapless inventor whose time machine sends his neighbor Ivan back in time and Ivan the terrible into the (then) present day. colorful, imaginative fantasy uses slapstick, sped up video, 4th wall breaking, stopmotion and other vfx but the film has a hard time juggling all the storylines. the humor is broad, as are the musical cues, but the sets and costumes are impressive. with a cute if put upon chernyy kot. a soft 3/5
I Was a Teenage Werewolf 1957
Tony has a short fuse and likes undercooked burgers so he winds up seeing a doctor who plays fast and loose with ethics and patient health. this pre “Altered States” is mostly maltshops, practical joke filled parties and offscreen violence mixed with human guinea pigs and ringing bells turning high schooler Tony into a monster. and those parallel bars didn’t hurt either. tho it functions well enough for what it is, the pacing isn’t great, there are lame transformations and lots of shrieking but at least the werewolf makeup looks good. starring Michael Landon. a decent 3/5

J

Jennifer 1978
what a theme song! too bad it’s the best part of this “Carrie” ripoff that sees country girl Jennifer run afoul of some stuck up snobs but she’s got other problems. she has a weirdo dad and no friends but luckily has a way with snakes. Bert Convey is the dreamy professor in a nightmare girls’ school with charming attendees and faculty. certainly one of the least suspenseful offerings of the decade. the ridiculously lengthy disco scene and glorious natatorium ladder incident are only matched by the Motor Trend meets Herpetology Weekly climax. otherwise softly filmed, slow, goofy and poor. warning: contains possible violence to a cat. 2/5
Jinzu burusu: Asu naki buraiha aka Jeans Blues: No Future 1974
Japanese sleaze and violence about a man with money and a woman with no plans, both on the run. mostly typical males as animals and females as either property or vengeful antiheroines stuff at least has the too cool Meiko Kaji as its lead. it’s filled with nihilism and America as the duo become a sharp dressing Bonnie and Clyde who dance to rock and roll and rob hunters wearing Izod hats. there’s also some attempts at humor which don’t help; ditto the fountains of blood but it’s all indicative of the broad tone and excessive script. probably more far out when it was released, it remains a stylish tragedy about two lost souls who find each other for better or for worse. 2.5/5
Judex 1963
Georges Franju directs this cruel yet almost campy version of the crime fighting vigilante hero that’s only as deep as its pulpy roots. within the old fashioned structure are similarities to more contemporary tv spy stuff but little fun to be had with them. looking not b+w so much as faded sepia, the print was poor and it’s certainly not among his best work but a terrific Francine Berge keeps you watching as a sort of comic book femme fatale. the rooftop scenes were replicated much more stylishly in his later “Nuits Rouges.” 2.5/5
Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom 2018
somehow I missed this one. boy, was I lucky. unwarranted installment sees the good guys who try to help square off against the bad guys who want to hurt. wait, which unwarranted installment is this? oh yeah, it’s the one where Bryce Dallas Howard and co venture to the remote home of remaining dinos to save them from extinction. yup. the movie, like Howard, looks great- too bad the script isn’t as attractive. stretches believability as thin as the characters: heroes are relatable yet heroically plucky while villains are sadistically self serving. a very generous 2.5/5 for the eye candy and the microscopically tiny amount of effectiveness.

K

Kaidan bancho sara-yashiki aka Ghost In the Well 1957
another tale of a wronged woman’s ghost, this time a drama of a hopeless romantic. she’s so in love with her overlord not even him killing her can stop it. the print was faded and more gray than black or white while the sparse ghostly fx were decent. at least it’s short since it’s not even a little bit spooky. 2.5/5
Kaidan semushi otoko aka House of Terrors 1965
a woman inherits a mountaintop mansion with amazing curb appeal and a hunchbacked caretaker in this well filmed b+w ghost story. said mansion is terrific, providing plenty of shadowy sets, and while the script and direction are good the visuals are the real star. the visit to the psychic was wonderfully weird and creepy and I enjoyed the hunchback skittering spiderlike up stairs and down narrow passages. some of the vocal fx were overdone and the (sexually exploited) victims don’t put up much of a fight. more good than bad so 3/5
Kamera o tomeru na! aka One Cut of the Dead 2017
film within a film meta mindjob that engages by slowly revealing how clever it is sees a horror movie crew menaced by real terrors. and if that sounds like something you’ve seen before, it isn’t. I can’t imagine the storyboarding and logistical nightmares that had to be overcome to make this but hats off to all involved. funny, gross and very impressive. 3.5/5
Kansen aka Infection 2004
low budget but effectively so Japanese horror about an understaffed hospital that takes in some real problem patients. lots of mirrors, odd characters and unsettling sound design work to create some wonderfully creepy moments. the dingy lighting, total commitment and EC comics vibe all add up to an icky if murky good time. 3/5
Kaosu/Chaos 2000
the best laid plans of mice and kidnappers often go awry, especially in this twisty Japanese tale that’s impossible to figure out so don’t even try. it’s strange and well filmed; at turns harrowing, menacing and erotic. 3/5
Kashchey bessmertnyy/Kashchei the Immortal 1945
epic b+w tale of old Russia uses sprawling outdoors to great effect as a warrior seeks to free his people from the monster Kashchey. utilizes a mostly effective if dated blend of optical and other vfx plus very impressive setpieces like the cliffside drawbridge and terrifying burning village. despite my disappointment with the antagonist, it’s short and sweet enough to come recommended for fans of the live action/animation fantasy genre. 3/5, higher if this is your thing.
Keep My Grave Open aka The House Where Hell Froze Over 1975
this slow moving horror being not Brownrigg’s best still means it’s enjoyably weird even if the score doesn’t do it justice. with colors so bland they could’ve come from century old easter egg crayons, largely insufficient lighting, unusual camera angles and the usual oddball cast of characters, there’s a bit of everything for the discriminating viewer. including some positively surreal moments, especially in the cheaply captured out of doors, or the cockeyed “putting on makeup” and resultant “tryst” scenes. it’s here that Brownrigg hits his marks but we the viewer may wish he hadn’t- they’re disturbing on many levels, mostly thanks to Camilla Carr’s performance. the film’s typically grimy, claustrophobic, sad, unpleasant and muddled yet effective. 3/5 if you’re hip.
Kiga kaiko aka A Fugitive From The Past 1965
very long b+w story of a murderer on the run in the aftermath of a ferry disaster uses vfx to enhance the narrative but it’s hit or miss. part political commentary, part police procedural, part social drama and epic in scope, it’s good but not great. a looong 3/5
The Killer Elite 1975
Robert Duvall, James Caan and more in Peckinpah’s crime drama that’s long and feels like it. too talky, too much comedy, too much rehab, too much slo mo but it’s so very ’70s that it scratched my itch. sprawling tale isn’t bad but not nearly as fascinating as it tries to be plus the ninjas were lame. 2.5/5
Killer Elite 2011
for some reason De Niro is in this Statham vehicle with lots of shooting where an assassin is forced to avenge the deaths of a sheik’s family. slightly overcomplicated, not entirely satisfying actioner has a score that’s often more invigorating than the film itself. other than a few good fight scenes it’s not great but at least it’s better than its ’70s namesake. 2.5/5 ymmv
Killer’s Moon 1978
quite poor tale of four drugged out mental patients dressed like waiters who escape captivity to terrorize locals and a bunch of schoolgirls. with the villains coming and going like someone lost most of the footage before reshooting wankers and a three legged dog in a tent, this is somehow both dull and sleazy with a fiasco of a score. plus the sickos are either third rate Shakespearean a la “A Clockwork Orange” or grunting killing machines who generate little if any menace. though it’s fairly well filmed in beautiful locations, this British crap might be best viewed as a spoof or black comedy. or just not viewed at all because it sucks. 1.5/5
Kind Hearts and Coronets 1949
black comedy about a greedy heir eliminating the competition features Alec Guinness in multiple roles and the adorable Joan Greenwood. the narration was the only minus in this funny and well photographed b+w British satire. 3.5/5
Kisapmata aka In The Wink Of An Eye 1981
purportedly based on a true story of newlyweds and the bride’s domineering father from Mike De Leon is ugly and frustrating to watch. when the kids leave the nest father of the year doesn’t handle it well. as for the lovers they’re as easy to root for as dad isn’t. with Charo Santos. unpleasant. 3/5
Kiss of the Tarantula 1975
awful/awesome weirdo trash about a mortician’s daughter and the charmers she’s surrounded by is alternately sad and hilarious. you see, Susan never had any two legged friends and mother of the year Martha has a hardline anti-arachnid stance. uncle is a gropey lech and the locals are liars and creeps. so what’s an outcast girl to do? the score is mostly bizarre and the spiders don’t seem very threatening- the victims die (quite rapidly) from fright or their own actions. dabbling in the real deal before building to a great (spider-free) horror finish, it’s decently filmed with good locations. fine if you like your schlock on the morbid and unseemly side. 3/5
The Kiss of the Vampire 1962
Hammer horror that’s at least not too brightly lit manages atmosphere due to an often effectively lurid quality to the photography. young newlyweds take shelter in the estate of an eccentric wealthy family and of course come to regret it. even tho the film’s still not dark enough overall for my taste, it looks great and boasts top notch production design plus a trio of lovely ladies. 3/5
Kosmicheskiy reys: Fantasticheskaya novella aka Cosmic Journey 1936
silent Soviet moon adventure is both antiquated and visionary with great miniatures and stop motion lunar escapades. there were several versions available online with various scores and print quality- hopefully a faithful restoration exists somewhere. definitely not thrilling as the sets and models are the only reason to watch this, obviously, and they mostly don’t disappoint: some are a bit clunky, yes, but that’s part of their charm, and other aspects are quite well done. for fans of the genre 3/5, just don’t expect too much excitement.
Kraftidioten aka In Order of Disappearance 2014
international revenger set in Norway sees a father go after those he believes responsible when his son turns up dead from an overdose. inferiorly remade as “Cold Pursuit,” it too makes the most of its snowy setting with beautiful natural landscapes, long moody shots and an evocative score. the cast is good, there’s racism, a gang war, satisfying violence and humor too. with Stellan Skarsgard. 3/5
Kunoichi Ninpo aka Female Ninja Magic 1964
weird, “arty” excuse to show naked women has shape shifting ninjas, lesbian moments and narrating ghosts. there’s lots of talk about seeds and life but the real draws are the sets and photography. just don’t ask about the endless gas. 2.5/5
Kyuketsu dokuro-sen aka The Living Skeleton 1968
on the cheap horror from Japan about, yup, a vengeful female spirit, this time the victim of murderous scum aboard a ship at sea. an odd mix of crime, revenge, dysfunctional family and crazy scientist movies has some nice nighttime exteriors and a few eerie touches but the rubber bats and plastic skeletons were not good, ruining scenes that could’ve been much more effective. still, it has its moments and looks mostly fine even if it seems to be too many things at once and not better than the sum of its parts. with a surprisingly brutal scene of cruelty to an animal which I’m assuming was simulated. a weak 3/5
Kyuketsu-ga aka Vampire Moth 1956
Nobuo Nakagawa directed entry has style and manages to be daring even if it’s more a mystery than the title would suggest albeit one with a high body count. a fashion designer is blackmailed by a masked vampire/werewolf with a gun while the police close in. with true horror elements, a few creepy shots and some skin’n’sleaze, it’s a little of everything that may have appealed to audiences wanting something edgy but not too edgy. mostly well filmed despite being a bit soft, there were plenty of shadowy sets with nighttime exteriors looking very good especially the park. not bad. 3/5

L

La bestia debe orrir/The Beast Must Die 1952
well filmed b+w Argentine drama told in flashback about a mystery writer seeking revenge for his son’s death. definitely has some tv level sequences but everything else is quite good including excellent sets and noir-ish lighting with terrific nighttime exteriors. the script gets fairly dark and the fine cast features the muy caliente Laura Hidalgo. 3.5/5
La cabina 1972
half-hour long Spanish tv movie is by turns chilling and surreal as a man becomes trapped in a telephone booth. directed and co written by Antonio Mercero, it’s definitely different and plays like a Kafkaesque Twilight Zone episode. a bit sci fi and a bit horror. 3.5/5
La casa sin fronteras/The House Without Frontiers 1972
a meek young man travels to the city and finds employment with a strict organization harder to get out of than a time share. there’s a mystery, a damsel in distress, creepy old people, bloody rituals and excellent photography especially in the moody outdoor scenes. what there’s not enough of is a reason to recommend this as it’s not very compelling though certainly not bad. it’s also a bit slow by design. 2.5/5 but ymmv
La chair de l’orchidee/The Flesh of the Orchid 1976
Charlotte Rampling plays a weird woman in this weird movie about weird people and a man who crosses paths with her and some killers. more a character glance than study, it’s moodily photographed with plenty of horror elements but too unfocused to generate much beside mild interest. good to fall asleep to. 2.5/5
La chambre ardente aka The Burning Court 1962
(dubbed, lousy audio off tubi) intermittently interesting pseudo gothic is uneven in every other aspect too but at least boasts a great chateau location and some pretty ladies. sections were not dubbed and my French is more than a little rusty so I couldn’t always be sure exactly what was happening. family members gather at the old manse and plot a murder while their dead uncle isn’t dead or something to that effect. talky, too long mystery thriller isn’t enough of anything. 2.5/5
La cripta e l’incubo aka Crypt of the Vampire 1963
(dubbed) well photographed international gothic luckily has good locations and shadowy sets because it’s barely suspenseful. a doctor visits a strange castle and investigates its ancestral secrets in another burned at the stake witch’s tale (no vampires here: the original title is more fitting). the uneven score and a modest streak are offset by the lovely ladies, especially Adriana Ambesi and Ursula Davis’ fast friendship, although in their case that modesty was a huge disappointment. directed by Camillo Mastrocinque. with Christopher Lee. 3/5
La diosa arrodillada/The Kneeling Goddess 1947
Gavaldon noir about a married man obsessed is very well filmed with loads of shadows, excellent compositions and a fine score. way too many musical numbers for me but otherwise a good script and performances make this a solid watch. with Arturo de Cordova and the charming Charito Granados. 3.5/5
La donna della domenica/The Sunday Woman 1978
Italian comedy about a murdered old lech and the list of suspects, some who aid in the investigation, stars Marcello Mastroianni and a dubbed Jacqueline Bisset. well shot with good color, the film captures its time and place with extensive locations and plenty of local atmosphere. unfortunately, it all keeps going long after the fun ends. nothing memorable. 2.5/5
La donna del lago/Lady of the Lake aka The Possessed 1965
very well filmed b+w Italian mystery tells of a writer who returns to a hotel in search of his crush and finds murder instead. some eerie, surreal visuals and excellent locations enhance what isn’t so much intriguing as muddled. a not bad 2.5/5
The Lady In the Car with Glasses and a Gun 1970
well filmed French/American colorful mystery has plenty of style and an international flair but its flawed structure betrays it. Oliver Reed and Samantha Eggar are excellent and a variety of great locations, all of them well utilized, add tons of flavor. unfortunately, forced narration gums up the works and pulls the plug on the whole shebang making a could’ve been very good time just pretty good. tldr: intriguing giallo derails with fatal info dump. a weak 3/5
La fille aux yeux d’or/The Girl With The Golden Eyes 1961
three annoying friends and an annoying woman blah blah who cares. I didn’t like this movie; I didn’t like the script or the characters. the men were jackass clowns and the women were no better by association. everyone either whined, yelled or spoke like they were quoting bad poetry or performing monologues. however, it was decently filmed despite a lot of it looking like made for tv quality and I’m willing to concede I wasn’t the target audience for this or just not in the mood- it was probably a lot more significant when it was made. forced, insincere, childish, shrill… no. 1.5/5
La guerra dei robot/War of the Robots 1978
(dubbed, p&s, fuzzy, faded) low/no budget Italian outerspace bunk is too much fun to judge too harshly. it’s also fairly earnest and offers rubbery suits, terrible haircuts and plenty of bleeps and blorps in the electronic score. the robotic announcements were almost as pervasive as the unexcitement and while I usually try to find original language versions the dubbed voices here were quite amusing, especially the “American.” also entertaining were the cheap video game lasergun sounds and one sorely lacking attempt at a lightsaber duel. some of the visuals managed a surrealness which worked well with the often trippy music and there was a sort of precursor to Emperor Palpatine but otherwise this stupidity feels like a not good tvm. 2/5 for the yuks.
La invasion de los vampiros/Invasion of the Vampires 1963
(dubbed) another entry in the Count Frankenhausen vampire mythos proffers the typical botany bent, fake vampire bat and odd score but luckily no goofy subplots to get in the way this time (the comic relief character came close). the best I’ve seen from Morayta so far with neat sets, plenty of shadows and “fog” and a terrific nighttime window, it still isn’t full on horror but does manage eeriness in both day and night scenes. 3/5
La lama nel corpo aka The Murder Clinic 1966
(lousy English dubbed German version) gothic murder mystery is run of the mill but manages some atmosphere with a decent budget and fair score. someone is killing people in a countryside mental hospital but it takes way too long. there are good sets and a little moodiness but other than Fred unless you’re hard up this is mostly yawn inducing. 2.5/5
La loba y la paloma/The Wolf and the Dove 1974
in this pelicula estrafalario directed by Gonzalo Suarez, a dubbed Donald Pleasence wants his statue back even if the traumatized daughter of the man he killed for it is in the way. it’s weird, there’s a dwarf, the Spanish countryside is beautiful but the characters are mostly not, neither in their actions nor appearances, with the definite exceptions of Carmen Sevilla and Muriel Catala. a sort of arthouse drama with drive in violence, its good use of locations help overcome its more exploitative leanings. not bad. 2.5/5
La madre muerta/The Dead Mother 1993
a psychotic thief spares a young girl’s life after killing her mother during a robbery only to see her again years later. very weird and very cruel Spanish film features gorgeous photography to counter the unpleasantness but no amount of artsy ambitions or dramatic score can soften the grotesqueries, which seem to pile on only as an endurance test. problem is, the villain is so detestable you’ll find little reason to want to pass this test. daring? more like ugly. 2.5/5
La maison sous les arbres aka The Deadly Trap 1971
Faye Dunaway is a woman who may or may not be losing her mind but with her family and friends who can blame her? half baked, frustrating mystery with a script that either hits you over the head or tries too hard to be vague is softly filmed, largely unenjoyable and filled with creepy characters. husband Frank Langella is an insufferable twit or I just don’t buy his puppydog look. come to think of it I’m not a fan of his earlier work but I do like him in some later roles. 2.5/5
La mariee etait en noir/The Bride Wore Black 1968
Truffaut’s tale of a would be bride with an agenda is a well shot mystery boasting a fine cast and extensive locations. it’s also a bit contrived but stylish and intriguing enough to make up for it. with Jeanne Moreau. 3/5
La matriarca akaThe Libertine 1968
a widow discovers her sexuality when she learns of her late husband’s love nest in this trashy Italian drama that’s goofy and pandering but well shot if not the grown up study it wants to be. it also flirts with fantasy and comedy with mixed results but the women are very beautiful and often naked. probably a lot more liberating in its day, it features the fabulous duo of Catherine Spaak and Fabienne Dali. 2.5/5
Lamb 2021
Ingvar and Maria had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb… Icelandic weirdness about a childless couple who take in a stray is a slowburn freakshow that uses its settings and livestock well (yeah yeah) and is mostly beautiful to look at. however, being unpredictable isn’t always satisfying. 3/5 ymmv
La moglie miu bella/The Most Beautiful Wife 1970
a young gangster takes the advice of his elder and looks for a bride among the poor in this Italian drama. Vito is an arrogant, obnoxious pig and Francesca the strong willed young woman who rightfully questions his motives and dares to resist his bullying although it means tragedy for herself and family. the film is very frustrating as everyone is either a coward, corrupt or human scum and I just didn’t buy Francesca’s efforts to do anything for Vito except castrate him and slit his throat. that said, Ornella Muti in her film debut is very good as the peasant girl who becomes a prisoner to Vito the creep’s machinations even as she displays extreme resolve and bravery. Ennio Morricone’s score intrudes and amplifies the proceedings, even lending scenes a foreboding menace. if you can stand yelling/throwing things at the screen, it’s a well shot but annoyingly unsatisfying film. for that reason 2.5/5, Muti’s performance notwithstanding.
La muerte camina en la lluvia/Death Walks in the Rain 1948
(bland but subtitled print off yt) Christensen directed mystery about a boarding house in Buenos Ares that may be harboring a maniac. this one robs and kills in the rain, leaving his name at the scenes like a signature. the film’s structure doesn’t allow for much suspense but the lighting is often good even if the image is a bit soft. some choice subtitles: “naivete is a masculine privilege.” “he who laughs embellishes in gold the brief book of their existence.” with Olga Zubarry. 3/5
La muerte ronda a Monica aka Death Haunts Monica 1977
(faded, 4×3 ltrbx) the stunning Nadiuska is the biggest thrill in this would be thriller about a rich woman surrounded by murder. it’s slow and soapy but has a funky score that almost makes up for the info dump wrap up. 2.5/5
La musica 1967
two strangers, a young woman and a businessman, cross paths and confide to each other their romantic mistakes. then the movie kept going and lost me entirely. for me it was a case of imagining the characters’ past, or even hearing them describe it, was more interesting then having it resolved. 2.5/5
La noche avanza/Night Falls 1952
after a fascinating look at Mexican jai-alai ca 1952 we’re introduced to major a-hole Marcos, a ruthless player both on and off the court. he thinks only the powerful and successful are “worthy” and even kicks dogs so of course women find him irresistible. all of which makes it impossible to want anything for him but utter ruin. while well shot with plenty of shadows and reflections, it all looks a tad on the cheap (especially considering the year it was made) but that may have been the print. from what I could decipher the dialog was very good- my srt file was horrendous- and in addition to the jai-alai court we see glimpses of the local airport as well as aerial footage of ?Havana?. despite the admittedly karma-licious ending, this is my least favorite of Gavaldon’s so far. 2.5/5
La notte dei diavoli/Night of the Devils 1972
(dubbed, drab) opening with very poor gore, an over the top protagonist and weird music, this Italian cursed village yarn suffers from its flashback structure but is mostly well filmed. a traumatized man remembers events that led to his hospitalization but his recounted actions are unrealistic, even for a movie like this. the dingy print along with good sets and locations provided some atmosphere while Agostina Belli and Teresa Gimpera were both bellissima. not bad and the final act was good. 2.5/5 ymmv
La novia ensangrentada akaThe Blood Spattered Bride 1972
in this Spanish horror sleaze, beautiful Mirabel Martin is the young bride haunted by nightmares. and her creepy husband. cue the blood, stabbings and gunshots. there are great locations, the film is stylish and mostly well shot plus the weirder it gets the better it gets. case in point: upon first meeting the naked woman hubby dug up at a beach(!), wifey says to her: “my husband told me what happened. I think you’d better have dinner with us.” ?huh? trouble is, as a mystery it takes waaaaaaaaaaaaaay too long to become intriguing. as horror, it’s light on chills. as a thriller it’s not bad but the ending stunk. warning: contains wholly repulsive and unnecessary scenes of trapping/killing an animal, thus points off from me. 2/5
L’anticristo/The Antichrist 1974
mostly well filmed Italian possession ripoff tale about a woman who’s a reincarnated witch has good sets, lots of tongue and a fine score. the pagan forest orgy is weird and colorful while the dinner scene is trashy gold. tho it’s a fairly solid production, the fx are poor and there are long slow sections that limit this to an above average cash in. 2.5/5
La nuit de la mort!/Night of the Dead 1980
odd French theatrical horror sees a young woman take a job at an old folks home where the residents are more spry than they let on. despite the setup and requisite creepy grounds/characters, the film is more comedy than anything else. often playing too broadly and uneffectively stagey, there is little to no suspense, the proceedings become ridiculous and the heroine is always two steps behind the viewer. nothing new but it is fairly well filmed with good color and Isabelle Duguey c’est tres belle. 2.5/5
La otra/The Other One 1946
twin sisters lead very different lives in this dark mystery thriller from Gavaldon. Delores del Rio is good as both sisters and there are enough twists to keep things interesting if not exactly fast paced. it’s also a bit melodramatic but a shadowy mansion, cool nighttime rooftop scenes and giallo-esque camera angles are plusses. 3/5
L’araignee d’eau/The Water Spider 1971
(very drab print off yt) an entomologist in an unhappy marriage finds his soul mate in this tres bizarre French film. sure it’s an awkward situation and yeah he’s weird but in his defense his wife is pretty annoying. not long fantasy has an agreeable timeless quality which along with the dark print worked to create some atmosphere. certainly different if not wonderful or satisfying. with the stunning Elisabeth Wiener. an odd 3/5
L’arma l’ora il movente/The Weapon The Hour The Motive 1972
fairly sleazy Italian mystery crime drama concerns a murdered priest and a list of suspects. the print was faded but the script was the real problem as this never rose above procedural with topless nuns thrown in for no reason. the sets are good, mainly the church and monastery, the kitten is cute and the kid is smart but it’s not enough to overcome the rest. with Claudia Gravy. 2.5/5
Las crueles aka The Exquisite Cadaver 1969
this Spanish mystery with plenty of style looks great and mostly intrigues if more in its setup than its indulgences which range from stagey to clumsy. a man receives revolting packages from a stranger which leads him to reexamine his relationships past, present and future. contains an lsd sequence, the second example I’ve found of something made famous in a much later horror hit and mujer hermosa especially Judy Matheson. bonus Superman, Batman and Robin posters in the office background. a diverting 3/5
La settima tomba/The Seventh Grave 1965
opening in “old Scotland” this gothic creaker tells of a family gathered for a will reading in their ancestral castle. a bit low budget, it’s not exactly bad just low on atmosphere and despite the shrieks is fairly nap inducing. the castle is terrific and that’s about it. yawn. 2/5
Lásky jedné plavovlásky/Loves of a Blonde 1965
Polish comedy drama is funniest when it takes its time since it otherwise frustrates with seemingly illogical scenarios. either it’s a cold look at the predator and prey roles of men and women, a cautionary tale of gullible youth, or it’s a study of loneliness in its many forms. all of which makes for an odd mix with so much absurdity. directed by Milos Forman, it’s a mostly amusing slice of life that doesn’t try to be much else. 3/5
L’assassino è costretto ad uccidere ancora aka The Dark Is Death’s Friend 1975
(dubbed) in a setup very similar to 1974’s “Eglima sto kavouri” a man hires a psycho to kill his wife. this meandering Italian thriller isn’t a giallo per se but it’s stylish, the score is groovy and it uses its locations effectively. some suspense and a weird rape scene round out what’s mostly a stolen car story. a kind 2.5/5
La strage dei vampiri/Slaughter of the Vampires aka Curse of the Blood Ghouls 1962
(dubbed) Italian gothic with fangs features a monster who, like the film itself, is a bit on the timid, talky side. the blonde haired vampire lead’s makeup is poor but the film boasts good sets and is mostly well photographed with the nighttime exteriors fairing quite well. too bad this is too slow to be suspenseful or exciting. 2.5/5
The Last Wave 1977
(bland pan and scan) agreeably weird Aussie tale stars Richard Chamberlin as a man who has dreams that may be more than just dreams. he plays a lawyer determined to defend several Aboriginal men against murder charges. moody with an effectively strange soundtrack, the natural surroundings (including nature itself) are well utilized and there are a few spooky moments. my only real complaint is Chamberlin’s actions in the finale didn’t make any sense to me and seemed quite out of character. a watery 3/5
Late Night With The Devil 2023
’70s set spooker evokes the time period and plays well despite a bit of a shaky start. David Dastmalchian plays a third rate talk show host who sees a ratings bonanza with a live on the air seance. enjoyable mindtrip of humorous horror keeps you guessing and features some great mayhem. an easy 3/5
La vendetta di Lady Morgan aka Lady Morgan’s Vengeance 1965
a beautiful young Barbara Nelli is the titular Lady whose new husband and lover try to get their hands on her fortune. the rest you can guess based on the title. nothing new there but this mid budget Italian gothic has atmosphere to spare and some effectively lit sequences in a great castle setting. tho a bit silly and illogical, the film plays with convention and utilizes some creative violence. poor uncle Neville! like the image, a soft 3/5.
La vie amoureuse de l’homme invisible aka The Invisible Dead aka Dr. Orloff’s Invisible Monster 1970
(dubbed) probably known by more names than those listed but too stupid to matter, this cheapfest has so little going for it it barely warrants a mention. way too dull, too brightly lit, a beyond implausible “story,” poorly filmed and directed… otoh, it’s got a bizarre score, some decent sets and that implausibility leads to quite a few chuckles. otooh, this ain’t horror and it ain’t sci fi: who knows what it is or why it was made but the extended rape scene is as unpleasant as it is clumsily staged. too poor to be worthwhile and too “good” to be enjoyably bad, it just lays there and stinks. several women got naked for this? my condolences. 1/5
Le boucher/The Butcher 1970
Chabrol’s study of a schoolteacher and the butcher who courts her is almost insultingly dull. forget slowburn; this is no burn. opening with a wedding reception in almost real time, the pace never picks up and the film is no honeymoon for the viewer. no surprises + no tension = snooze. try it without subs if you don’t parlez francais- you might stay awake longer trying to invent your own dialog. 2/5
Le couer fou/Mad Heart 1970
sometimes eerie, sometimes disorienting tale of a divorced man and the troubled young beauty he lets upend his life. almost every character is abrasive or detestable and while it’s beautifully photographed, the borderline psychedelic optical effect is overused. strange fantasy that’s both frustrating and affecting is at its best when it untethers its leads. 2.5/5, higher if you can overlook the patience testing windup.
Legacy 1975
Joan Hotchkis wrote and stars in Karen Arthur’s strange drama about an unhappy, self absorbed, idle rich woman that’s part frank examination of female sexuality and part character study. an obtrusive score tries too hard to set a mood or convey the mc’s mental state and that’s a shame: it’s the audio equivalent of telling not showing, or worse, the director either recognizing flaws or over compensating. being not only Arthur’s directorial debut but also the screenplay of fellow actress Hotchkis might explain it but either way the heavy handed score makes what could’ve been poignant or unsettling seem broad and obvious. perhaps it would’ve made a better stage adaptation- I’d like to see it again with the score removed. if nothing else, Hotchkis is very good here especially when her character finally lets loose. a challenging 3/5
The Legacy 1978
Katharine Ross and Sam Elliott travel to England to accept a mysterious job offer in Richard Marquand’s supernatural thriller that suffers from some awful music. it’s otherwise solid if no less frustrating than these sort of stories are- why don’t they, why would they etc etc- while “Buns” Elliott and his heartland surfer routine only go so far. the kills are imaginative and it all looks good, plus the estate is awesome and well utilized. 3/5
Le golem 1970
verbose French existential drama isn’t wrapped enough in sci fi horror fantasy to excite beside some creepy moments and nice sets. other than endless soliloquies and narration there is good photography but the film was definitely not what I was hoping for and too slight to recommend. 2.5/5
Le monache di Sant’Arcangelo/The Nuns of Saint Archangel aka The Nun and the Devil 1973
(dubbed, washed out) mid budget Italian and French nunsploitation offering is on the tamer side despite some nudity and a bit of kink. it deals with the politics of choosing a mother superior and one nun’s schemes against and involving her fellow sisters. not very engrossing and since there’s little sleaze (and no devil, unless you count the catholic church and its inquisitioners) the film is more historical drama than anything but at least has some nice locations and costumes at its disposal. a few scenes are straight out of Bosch-like horrors with black hooded figures, axe wielding executioners and medieval torture devices; with as much horror potential as these setpieces offer, they are curiously under scored and played too stiffly to come alive. 2.5/5
Leng xue shi san ying aka Avenging Eagle 1978
colorful Shaw brothers yarn about one of thirteen trained assassins who travels with a yada yada there are mostly good fight scenes, beautiful natural locations and nicely lit sets but it all gets a little tedious. if you go for this stuff you can definitely do a lot worse but it was either too talky or too fighty and just not out there enough for me. a well made 2.5/5
Le passager de la pluie/Rider On The Rain 1970
a woman fights off an attacker only to find herself in the middle of a mystery in this unusual French offering featuring a dubbed Charles Bronson. not bad but talky and slow however Jill Ireland looks phenomenal in her two scenes so it’s a wash. 2.5/5
Le petit soldat/The Little Soldier 1963
Godard’s b+w drama set during the Algerian war about doomed lovers has an abstract narrative and manages a few moody moments but it’s not his best work. some nice exteriors including nighttime Geneva and a touch of gloom help but the film struck me as less than the sum of its parts: easier to like as a trailer or series of screenshots than as a whole. and extended torture sequences don’t make this any more enjoyable. 2.5/5
Le quai des brumes aka Port of Shadows 1938
(restored) ennui drenched story of a sad sack soldier who finds life a bit trop tard. the cast is good while the foggy outdoors and cramped indoors suit the proceedings. mostly well photographed with fine atmosphere. 3/5
Le regine aka Queens of Evil 1970
(dubbed) after a car accident, a free spirit finds his new world is a fairy tale cottage in the woods with three strange women. strange as in unfamiliar and strange as in weird. the food keeps coming as do the comically bizarre events in this Italian slowburn parable. it has its moments, like the spooky nighttime woods and some dreamlike fantasy sequences, but is too slight to warrant much excitement. 2.5/5
Les levres rouges aka Daughters of Darkness 1971
beautifully photographed vampire tale about an annoying newlywed couple you’ll want to see drained of blood but not before they’re both permanently muted. colorful entry in the Bathory legend casts Delphine Seyrig and Andrea Rau as the countess and her companion, respectively. the sprawling hotel makes a fine setting but the intrigue soon fades, mostly because the cast insist on reading their lines, so we’re left with a stylish meh. a strong 2.5/5 for the visuals, higher if that’s all you’re looking for.
Les soleils de l’ile de Paques/The Suns of Easter Island 1970
international sci fi environmentalist fantasy about six strangers who find mysterious marks on their hands leading them to the titular island in Chile. it espouses that the Earth is to be visited by beings bearing intergalactic gifts until the final montage, which is necessary and accurate I suppose but still very hard to watch. the electronic score is intermittently abrasive but mostly effective, even intense at times. I wasn’t a fan of the narration or the stiffly choreographed movements but the film was otherwise interesting and conforms quite nicely to my favored solution to the Fermi paradox. a hippie-like 3/5
Le spie uccidono in silenzio aka Spies Strike Silently 1966
(dubbed) Spanish Italian fare about a rich wacko and the business man’s spy mostly looks good tho it’s a bit silly and on the cheap. the sets, locations and a sort of sci fi villain plot help as does a very brunette Erika Blanc but it’s all goofy and slapdash. plus it would seem these era dubbed spy films always have at least one line that never got translated. 2.5/5
L’etrangleur/The Strangler 1970
those French are at it again! a wtf opening sets the stage for this cat and mouse thriller about a murderer who has a scarf fetish and weird picnic dreams. oh and some followers including a politically incorrect cop and a thief. the killer’s boyish good looks and easy manner, combined with his delusional motives, make him seem more “normal” or at peace than most of the cast. odd film is an arty, theatrical crime drama that glosses over each sordid killing, even suggesting the victims welcomed their demise. perhaps too stylish for its own good. 2.5/5
Le Vourdalak 2023
a king’s messenger is stranded at the home of a family whose returning father is not quite himself in this strange French horror. dad is quite a sight: he’s all kinds of creepy but oh so personable. the scares are balanced by the nuanced characters and a black humor but overall it wasn’t much to my liking other than the production design. 2.5/5
Libahunt 1964
bewitching Estonian folk horror fantasy is dreamlike and nightmarish with bizarre sound design. asks the question who are the real beasts: animals or humans? the print was dark but that only added to the spookiness- I don’t think I’d want to see a brighter version. the natural locations are put to good use and the score is evocative. 3.5/5
Lies 1983
despite a diabolically clever concept and some twists, this Ken & Jim Wheat production is an express ride to cheeseville. opening with a thrilling driving sequence, everything satisfies with startling precision: the flat, bland image, bad clothing/hair, lousy music, lousy supporting actors and walks on the beach. but it’s got a plucky heroine, disappearing orderlies, Pinto Cadillacs, an awesome patient escape, a fiery getaway walkaway and Clu Gulager. yup. like a stale candybar it still gives you what you need even tho it’s miles from fresh. 3/5
Lilith 1964
a young army vet bonds with a female patient when he starts working in a mental hospital. while well made, the film looks fine but the script is ultimately fuzzy and superficial. Warren Beatty and Jean Seberg lead a good cast including Peter Fonda and Kim Hunter. with misogyny, some implied lesbianism and a weird scene involving two young boys. 2.5/5
L’Immortelle 1963
strikingly filmed but opaque drama about the fallibility of memory or the intangibility of reality or how nothing is what it seems since everyone lies. a traveler accepts a ride from a morose beauty only to spend his time looking for her. the disjointed, time shifting narrative weaved a spell but it didn’t mesmerize me. 2.5/5 ymmv
L’inconnu de Shandigor/The Unknown Man of Shandigor 1967
strikingly filmed b+w French fantasy about a scientist who invents a device to negate a nuclear explosion. definitely different, it’s part satire, part spy intrigue and more than a little “Dr. Strangelove.” it’s a lot of everything but not a lot to hold onto. by turns surreal, comical and creepy, it plays more like a series of loosely connected threads than an absorbing whole, seemingly all style over substance. still, it’s mostly interesting and looks fantastic. just don’t go in the pool. a wan 3/5
Lisa e il diavolo/Lisa and the Devil 1973
(dubbed) very strange Bava tale has Telly “Kojak” Savalas as a puppeteering butler and Elke Sommer the confused tourist trying to find her way. dark gothic fantasy is pleasantly surreal but also goofy; colorful even as the image is often soft, although that may have been intentional. whatever it is, it’s certainly different. 3/5
Lisl and the Lorlok 2011
cheap but diverting edgy family fare about a young girl and her parents who come to live with grandma after grandpa has a supposed heart attack. there are so many problems with this movie it’s almost better to focus on what works but what fun is that? it’s blandly filmed with barely adequate acting and seems to want to be better than it is instead of proudly wallowing in its cheapness. coming across like a way too high budgeted ineffective tv movie, it makes scant use of its surroundings and is filled with bargain basement moments and familiar tropes but while short on scares still manages to engage. sort of like a not too bright possible love interest you keep hoping will surprise you. well intentioned if illogical fantasy could’ve been a lot of things but if you keep your expectations low and want something to watch with the not too little ones it’ll do. a generous 2.5/5
Live Again Die Again 1974
Joseph Stefano scripted tv movie about a cryogenically frozen woman revived after more than three decades who discovers the old family ain’t what it used to be. mystery thriller manages some mildly spooky vintage tv movie moments but it too often borders on over the top melodrama especially from Vera Miles and Geraldine Page. and the weirdly rushed ending doesn’t help. starring Donna Mills, Walter Pidgeon and Mike Farrell. 2.5/5
Locke 2013
Thomas Hardy is a one man show in this drama about an engineer in a sticky bind that keeps getting stickier. Ivan Locke can’t escape the shadow of his father as he drives away from a career make or break job to right a personal wrong. Hardy gives a nuanced performance as he gets squeezed from all directions but the end result can’t or won’t rise above the confines of the concept. 2.5/5
The Lodger 2009
not a remake but sees a poorly scored modern day Jack the Ripper terrorize the streets while troubled Hope Davis tries to cope. uneven performances and odd tonal shifts abound as the movie tries to be too many things but just winds up being clumsy and a bit gimmicky. add an info dump wrap up and you can file this under nah. 2/5
Lolly Madonna xxx 1973
a woman gets kidnapped by feuding families in this not enjoyable backwoods drama that luckily has a good cast and an excellent sense of place. it’s also increasingly violent and feels like a stage play despite the overuse of slow motion. Rod Steiger, Jeff Bridges, Gary Busey. 2/5
The Long Arm aka The Third Key 1956
safecracker crime mystery is smartly written but too procedural to generate suspense or excitement. very low key with good sets and mostly fine lighting. 2.5/5
L’orribile segreto del Dr. Hichcock aka The Secret of Doctor Hichcock aka The Horrible Dr. Hichcock 1962
Italian gothic sleaze about a “doctor” with some serious problems and a cozy home is well made if not up to the challenge it so eagerly offers. there is no deeper delving into the gross doctor’s mind than melodramatic mugging in this light on dialog film but otoh there was quite a few lira spent by the looks of it, which is quite strange considering the subject matter. my only guess is that films like “Psycho,” “Peeping Tom” and the adult nature of Bunuel’s films may have played a part in this thing being made in an attempt to show Italy can be “bold” too. other than doc the performances were solid and the score is good. there’s even a young Barbara Steele to help sell the castle atmosphere. 2.5/5
L’osceno desirio/Obscene Desire 1978
an unfortunately coiffed Marissa Mell is standing on a wooded path under the moonlight, her blue dress billowing in the wind. now you’ve just envisioned the best and most atmospheric ten seconds of the whole movie and don’t have to waste any more time on this half-baked “Rosemary’s Omen” wannabe. strange Italian/Spanish stinker is both sleazy and timid with unerotic sex scenes scored to illustrate the passion of what you’re witnessing or unerotic sex scenes scored to… do something, I guess, but what I don’t know. there are occult rituals, some gore, plenty of nudity and a creepy cast of characters but it’s too slow, goofy and blandly filmed to be much more than Mell overacting or making funny faces. with more effort and skill this could’ve been worth the tag “cash-in.” 2/5
Los monstruos del terror aka Assignment Terror 1970
luckily this international pelicula boasts decent production values because otherwise we’d be left with a didactic Michael Rennie walking around in a Naschy movie with a dumb script. oh wait. sensation deprived aliens have the tech to get here and inhabit our dead bodies but to conquer Earth decide to resurrect the Universal horror monsters. this movie manages to be both well filmed on good sets/locations and low budget silly. it’s got giallo-like camera shots, groovy fashion, laboratory beeps and fizzes but it’s also got lousy monster makeup and a c-level supporting cast. otoh, it’s colorful and a plethora of lovely ladies including Karin Dor soothe some of the pain. good to fall asleep to. 2/5
Love and a .45 1994
comedy crime drama has infectious energy and two great leads in Renee Zellweger and Gil Bellows. their chemistry is palpable and the glue that holds this violent love story together since the antagonistic obstacles to their blissful future are obnoxious bullies all. the film is too indulgent in its desire to thrill and I didn’t care for the narration but it’s otherwise well paced and mostly satisfying. 3/5
Love In The Afternoon 1957
older Gary Cooper falls for younger Audrey Hepburn in this romantic comedy directed and co written by Billy Wilder. I’m a huge fan of his but not of this movie- it wants to be witty and charming, and even if it succeeds, it isn’t very convincing. Hepburn is much too convenient as written while Cooper is unremarkable, also as written. “you talk too much.” yup. 2.5/5
Love Me Deadly 1972
and grossly. with a split personality, this is definitely multi level icky, only in the ’70s sleaze. playing one minute as a horror nudie and the next as a tragic love story nudie, it also easily fits into the “pornos you don’t want to see” category, encompassing all the revolting points and more. somehow Lyle Waggoner is in this retch about a woman with more than a few issues, none of them pleasant. and she ain’t the only one, including who in god’s name decided to bankroll this. there are some moments of horror and dread but there’s also “Blood Sucking Freaks” level copout laziness and corny music to balance the nausea. “star” Mary Charlotte Wilcox as Lindsay is attractive enough in the role but not much more; at no time did she seem to actually inhabit the character and allow us to appreciate her conflicts. instead she plays only the adult child and is overly physical in her performance; everything else is flashbacks and editing/manufactured script. none of which is likely her fault. I have no desire to imagine a more effective way to be brought into Lindsay’s world so I’ll just label myself as not the target audience for this one. takeaway: learn to lock the door when you’re doing sick things. 1.5/5
Lubie nietoperze/I Like Bats 1985
Grzegorz Warchol’s blood drinker tale is definitely different and enjoyable but not scary tho it does offer an interesting cure for vampirism. it’s stylish if mostly of its time, stocked with beautiful women and even has some humor and eerie imagery. 3/5
Lured 1947
a great cast shines in this tale of a murderer on the loose in London. Lucille Ball is terrific as the friend of the latest victim who agrees to act as bait for Scotland Yard. mostly successful mix of comedy and mystery has George Sanders, Charles Coburn, Alan Napier, Cedric “hot chocolate” Hardwicke, well filmed night exteriors, shadowy sets plus a wacky Boris Karloff. 3/5

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Macabre 1958
early Castle thriller isn’t suspenseful due to its structure, suffers from a slow start and offers less than compelling leads. it also doesn’t have the quality photography or atmosphere of his later productions so it’s thoroughly mediocre. 2.5/5
The Mafu Cage 1977
Lee Grant and Carol Kane star as sisters in a very strange film of co-dependency and role reversal directed by Karen Arthur. Kane is perfect as childlike and creepy Cissy while Grant is appropriately mechanical as the put upon sister who devotes her life to her. but, animal lover or not, no one should ever allow anyone to kill animals under the pretense of shielding that person from psychological evaluation. that’s not making sacrifices to keep your sibling happy, that’s ignoring your role in perpetuating atrocities. the two leads are excellent together and as believable as possible while the estate is well utilized. drama or horror, think of it as a sort of “Repulsion” by way of “Whatever Happened To Baby Jane.” be aware of an ugly scene simulating the killing of an orangutan. a dark and disturbing look at mental illness and de-evolution. with Will Geer. 3/5
Manchas de sangre en un coche nuevo/Bloodstains in a New Car 1975
Mercero directed tale of a greedy man who doesn’t assist a roadside accident and lives to regret it. like his “La Cabina,” this odd thriller incorporates the surreal and the absurd in its horror. dark doings with a bizarre score that unsettles and a bit of a “Tales From the Crypt” pulpy vibe. 3/5
The Man From Hong Kong 1975
boasting an international flavor, this Australian and Hong Kong tale of a Chinese cop tracking a drug lord is mostly well made and colorful. it’s also wasteful and corny with wooden performances and interminable, unconvincing fights chock full of kung fu sfx. so, another good premise poorly executed but at least it was a good premise. despite a few mis steps (I’m looking at you, ridiculous “love song” montage) the score is fine. if you’re a skydiving fanatic or hard up for exploding cars it’s not terrible; maybe a leaner cut would play better. 2.5/5
Mang nu qi yuan aka Black Alice 1975
B grade Hong Kong mystery about an escaped lunatic and the blind woman who aids him. there’s dancing, martial arts, acupuncture etc but not much suspense or intrigue. a bit over the top and goofy but not bad and the lead actress was very beautiful so that helped. 2.5/5
Maniac 1963
after a startling opening, we’re dancing to the jukebox but Liliane Brousse is so cute it doesn’t matter much. and stepmom as played by Nadia Gray ain’t too shabby either, a woman plotting a jailbreak. it’s a Hammer production so it’s well photographed in b+w with good shadows and locations but it’s also a victim of its time with abrupt tonal changes and an often brash score. Donald Houston makes the most of his role as the deranged villain. there’s more to like than not so 3/5
Man in the Wilderness 1971
after being mauled by a bear, a trapper (Richard Harris) is left for dead in the out of doors in this well shot adventure based on the story for “The Revenant.” Harris’ struggle is realistic and grueling (and disgusting: animal lovers, beware snare traps and one horrific scene of him fighting over some fresh buffalo). despite the beauty of the natural surroundings I found it ultimately too long, overstuffed with bombastic violence and chewing to match all that scenery. a rumpled John Huston and his ship on wheels are a highlight, especially the nighttime scene of him pacing on deck. 2.5/5 but ymmv
The Manipulator 1971
Mickey Rooney “stars” in this turd about a psycho and his female captive with experimental (read- dated) vfx and an eclectic score. contains some disturbing scenes and imagery however the ravings of a lunatic don’t always make for a good script. though it’s extraordinarily unpleasant, it manages an effective grimness but is also clunky and dull. 1.5/5
Mannekang i rott aka The Red Mannequin 1958
murders centered around a modeling agency make up this lighthearted proto giallo with lots of suspects and motives. well filmed, the 1950s color and lighting were mostly good with darker scenes fairly stylized. 3/5
Mannen pa taket/Man On The Roof 1976
violent Swedish crime drama that concerns police corruption and a sniper is over the top and a bit meandering. it’s otherwise well made and mostly engaging but takes a while to gain any traction. a half hearted 3/5.
Man On A Tightrope 1953
talky but well acted tale of a circus owner who runs afoul of fascism is large in scope and boasts a great cast. suspenseful and affecting. 3/5
Marie-poupée 1976
(faded) disturbing French drama about a poupée (doll) collector who marries a childlike young woman so he can pretend she’s one of his dolls. man I watch some weird merde. he’s not only a creepy freak with serious issues but he’s selfish too. he introduces his bride to his fetish “game” only to see her take to it, eventually viewing it as normal, but it’s entirely one sided. he’s either incapable or uninterested in relating to a living, breathing female. they even sleep in separate rooms. tho he won’t, it seems most everyone else is only too glad to ogle or grope Marie. or worse. when the depths of her husband’s sickness is revealed it’s stomach turning. the ending perplexes. so wtf is this movie? a sad, ugly drama that borders on horror but mostly lingers in icky. written and directed by “Don’t Deliver Us From Evil” Joel Seria. hmmm. that movie also featured very young looking actresses behaving abnormally in a faux arthouse context. perhaps Mr. Seria had his own, ahem, quirks? 2/5
Marrowbone aka Secretos ocultos 2017
young brothers and sister vow never to be separated after the death of their mother but their bond is tested by threats more sinister than the outside world. Spanish American production effortlessly evokes its time period and gets plenty creepy but has more on its mind than just scares. some of which, unfortunately, involves horror movie type characters doing ill advised things and a structure that implies plot holes and logic lapses until the final reveal. the cast is uniformly strong, the locations and old manse are well utilized but one too many twists keep the film from hitting its highest high. an ok 3/5
Marta 1971
(faded, dingy, dubbed) after a crazy opener, things get bad in melodramatic giallo fashion as a weird mama’s boy weirdly meets a weird woman. the manse makes a good setting but this is strictly dullsville. would be ok to fall asleep to were it worth the effort. with Marissa Mell. 2/5
Mas alla del terror/Beyond Terror 1980
a group of drug using thugs pay for their sins in this slow moving horror that in its better moments recalls ’70s era gialli. after a promising start things bog down for an eternity until the catacombs come into play. there’s weirdly earnest attempts at eroticism and over the top violence, the thugs are hate-worthy and their “passengers” not a whole lot more likable or believable. it’s fairly well filmed, especially the crypt, but otherwise not good. 2.5/5
Max Payne 2008
Mark Wahlberg and Mila Kunis among others star in a cop out for justice/revenge story about demons or drugs or demon drugs. for some reason I thought he was going to be some kind of resurrected Spectre type cop which would’ve been way better. at least it looks expensive and is not quite as bad as its title, being mostly a three way tie between Olga Kurylenko and Kunis and the lighting for most beautiful. 2.5/5 for the photography.
Mean Mother 1973
can you dig it, baby? no? I don’t blame you but fortunately I’m not like you and I dug it, mama. with a funky ass soundtrack and the lamest fights/shootouts/etc ever, this typically hilarious and dull offering from old Al “stars” Dobie Gray as a MASH locations Vietnam vet trying to change his luck. plenty of babes, bad acting, bad dialog, bad organ playing, an awful poolside tryst and car chase… did I mention it was boring? at least Adamson had some money this time. best line: “eat it, you motherfuckers.” 3/5 for the laughs.
Meteor 1979
dull and lame armageddon scenario had money but spent it unwisely in addition to asking Natalie Wood and Brian Keith to speak Russian. a soft, faded picture didn’t help the decent models look any better, the drab lighting did nothing for interiors and the score failed to mitigate the film’s myriad other failings. 2/5
The Midnight Man 1974
Burt Lancaster stars in a mystery that feels a lot like a tv movie with scattered vulgarity. he kicks ass but it’s all blandly filmed with cartoonish hillbilly villains and lots of talking. co starring Cameron Mitchell and a good Catherine Bach in a small role. 2.5/5
Midnight Offerings 1981
made for tv horror with a high body count about resident highschool witch Vivien not appreciating any competition from new girl Robin. teen witch Melissa Sue Anderson is mostly unconvincing except in a terrific masks off peeing contest with mom as her spell casting monotone seems designed to more resemble Barbie than lucifer. the rest of her performance is rote tv stalker/jilted ex fluff or looking pretty in a black hood with dark eye liner. lots of familiar faces help improve a halfbaked offering where if nothing else the misguided script employs more of the roles of witches’ familiars beyond just cute purring kitties. with a decent shop class telekinetic battle that turns icky and frankly opens up more about the character of Vivien than the rest of the movie. a watchable but not much more 3/5
Mikey and Nicky 1976
John Cassavetes and Peter Falk are an odd couple when one friend finds a contract out on his head and the other tries to help. there are tons of laughs especially in the first half but as Cassavetes is revealed to be more and more despicable the humor dries up. written and directed by Elaine May, this dramatic study of bad and broken people contains revolting scenes of violence toward women. 3/5
Mind Over Murder 1977
with a bizarre opening that goes from sixty to zero, the tone is unfortunately set for this Deborah Raffin tv vehicle about psychic visions of a bald man with what sometimes looks like a mouth in his forehead. the premise itself isn’t the problem; nor is it model turned actress Raffin. it’s what passes for a script that sees the mc hide proof of the validity of her premonitions from the man she lives with so she can hold hands with a fed in the park. it’s in the almost randomly effective lighting and visuals. it’s the one step forward, one step backward engagement and how the villain looks creepy one moment and ridiculous the next. on the plus side, things get pretty dark for a tvm as it manages a near slasher tone and the score is good. could probably be edited into a decent thriller but the runtime would be around twenty five minutes. with Bruce Davison, Robert Englund, an ambulance for some reason and a great bus driver. 2/5
Minnie and Moskowitz 1971
alternately amusing and hard to watch Cassavetes drama has good performances and flawed, obnoxious (and worse) characters. life is messy and difficult- so is this film. one of its best scenes is a wine fueled heart to heart where costar Gena Rowlands laments how there are no Bogarts and movies falsely depict love as rainbows and happy endings. I might argue that’s the precise point of most movies: to offer an escape, to provide a stylized version of reality. yet ultimately this movie does the same thing Rowlands had accused cinema of doing, only perhaps not so neatly. it says loud and clear that love, however improbable or unexpected, is possible. even inevitable. it also presents violence toward women as par for the course, a common theme in Cassavetes’ work as both actor and writer. a frustrating but intermittently rewarding 2.5/5
Misiunea spatialã Delta/Delta Space Mission 1984
a super brain machine falls in love with a redhead in this Romanian animation tale of aliens and robots with too much narration but psychedelic backgrounds and vibrant colors almost make up for it. looking mostly like a Zap comix 1970s saturday morning kids’ show, the animation is a style that is both detailed and simplistic which was not to my liking. kids might enjoy this more. 2.5/5
Mission: Impossible- The Final Reckoning 2025
superbly made action vehicle has a definite sense of finality to it, mostly as star Cruise is starting to look his age. the diverse cast is game, the setpieces good to amazing and the film long but never dull. some of the sequences made little to no sense but like a roller coaster ride you don’t have to question its raison d’etre- just hold on tight. 3/5
Misterios de la magia negra/Mysteries of Black Magic 1958
in a setup that may have inspired HGL’s “The Wizard of Gore,” a stage magician uses ancient spells to amaze and terrify audiences. though modestly budgeted, it’s got a fine score, the sets are well utilized, there are loads of shadows and it’s all well played if a bit stagey at times. a short and sweet 3.5/5.
Molchaniye doktora Ivensa aka Dr. Iven’s Silence 1974
Russian sci fi about a scientist who encounters alien superhumans uses creative vfx and a solid score to elevate it slightly above its low budget bones. our doc is a chatty bad husband who doesn’t sustain much sympathy but Orante his space crush is enigmatic and easily the film’s best character. talky and not great but not bad. 3/5
Momentum 2015
Morgan Freeman must’ve owed somebody to be in this marginally serviceable yarn about a spy and some diamonds. Olga Kurylenko is fine and at least they don’t make her out to be unrealistically strong. lots of green tint and style but not much else. a kind 2.5/5
Mondo Keyhole 1966
Jack Hill low budget sleaze purports to divine the boundary between reality/sanity and fantasy/insanity with wall to wall smut, boobies and Howard the rapist who’s not interested in his ridiculously gorgeous wife. basically the definition of gratuitous, this roughie/cheapie has an unfortunate score, too much narration and tho the women are indeed photogenic the whole thing is so cruddy its aspirations as an examination of the human psyche become painfully (and tediously) obviously just a flimsy excuse. otoh, great use of a mirror and I liked the elevator beatdown. 1/5
The Moon-Spinners 1964
Hayley Mills and Eli Wallach star in this colorful international mystery about a teen mixed up with jewel thieves. it’s a bit Disney, a bit Mills vehicle while too much a G rated wannabe grownup crime thriller to really gel. there are nice locations but not enough atmosphere or fun with some suspect “night” scenes and green screen fx. unessential. 2.5/5
Moy laskovyy i nezhnyy zver/My Tender and Affectionate Beast aka The Shooting Party 1978
an opportunistic young beauty wreaks havoc with the lives of her suitors in this Russian period piece. a lively production with expansive sets and locations, it didn’t exactly satisfy as much as envelop with passionate performances and a bit too much singing. a 3/5 for the effort.
Mozambique 1964
although it looks good with an international flair and some groovy music, this story of a pilot is so dull not even the plethora of beautiful women can save it. it’s not so much a movie as a sleep aid. I think the script itself dozed off. the sound you’ll hear will be your tv snoring. best line: “what are you doing with my bicycle?” boring and poor: poring. 1.5/5
Mumford 1999
a therapist with secrets has a powerful impact on a small town that bears his name. funny and mostly interesting enough to encompass both drama and comedy but it’s too cookie cutter cute to be anything more than lighthearted. in the old days people used to shoot themselves in these kind of movies. just sayin. 3/5
Murder By Contract 1958
on the cheap borderline beatnik thriller about a zen hitman for hire on the west coast struggling with his latest assignment. unfortunately scored with bongo club guitar vamping, there’s too much humor and melodrama but pacing issues are its biggest problem. plays a bit like a tv movie. 2.5/5
Murder She Said 1961
Margaret Rutherford witnesses a murder as Miss Marple in this British mystery with great sets and lighting, the darker scenes faring especially well. it’s all quite good but I didn’t care for the broader comedic touches. 3/5
My Name Is Julia Ross 1945
a young woman is hired by creepy people and finds herself a new life in this British shorty. there are some shadows, good exteriors and it moves nicely for what it is but the premise seems far less than tenable. the game cast includes George Macready. 3/5

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Nachts wenn der Teufel kam/The Devil Strikes At Night 1957
it’s wartime Germany in this Robert Siodmak directed drama about a serial strangler roaming free while an innocent man is detained. when politics clash with morality and the truth, an investigator finds survival comes at a price. far from exciting but certainly dark with some nicely lit sets and good performances. not bad. 2.5/5
Nazareno Cruz y el loba/Nazareno Cruz and the Wolf 1975
Argentinian folktale fantasy is mostly well shot and often engrossing but it’s also too cornily on the nose and overblown to the point of brash. a young man just happened to be born cursed- if he falls in love he will transform into a werewolf. strictly offscreen, that is. like all of these stories, I always root for the wolf more than the man. certainly not horror although supernatural, it’s a werewolf movie for people who don’t like werewolf movies. often beautiful to behold but just as obvious, try it if you’re in the mood for a unique, South American arthousey version. 2.5/5
Neither the Sea Nor the Sand aka The Exorcism of Hugh 1972
British fantasy horror is moody with beautiful seaside locations but awful music gives it a goofy almost parodical feel. a pair of lovers find nothing gets in the way of their promises. or their canoodling. strange and interesting variation on some familiar themes. 3/5
The Neon Ceiling 1970
tvm about an unhappily married woman prone to self harm who runs off with her daughter and finds a new world in the middle of the desert at a rundown diner with an eccentric owner. I was not expecting such a wonderful time when I started this. while it’s not perfect (some moments are forced and superficial) it unfolds at such an easy, angular pace that you’re invested before you even realize it. for a small, low budget film about loneliness, growth, honesty, our needs and the place we inhabit amongst others it feels more like a dream. while Lee Grant and Gig Young are very good it’s Denise Nickerson as the wise beyond her years daughter Paula who steals the show. she’s rude, tough, smart, honest and imaginative. this engaging, funny and moving film is very much like an adaptation of a stage play and highly recommended even if the ending is a letdown. 4/5
The Nest of the Cuckoo Birds 1965
b+w pet project of actor Bert Williams is cheap, stagey and almost psychedelic in its amateur hour weirdness. Williams plays Johnson, a cop trying to bust some moonshiners in the everglades but his mission, like the rest of the plot, is almost beside the point. the bongo and tremelo guitar score, grotesque “southern gothic” overacting, terrible makeup, odd camera work and sleepy pace can’t prepare you for the quacked out swamp sprite knife attacks. yes, there’s a knife wielding swamp sprite or somesuch who skitters across the screen in jarring edits accompanied by shrieking. Jackie Scelza easily gives the best performance as daughter Lisa who is as enigmatic as she is sympathetic. very strange and aimless with hints of “Spider Baby,” “Jennie: Wife/Child” and “Manos: Hands of Fate” but really in a class of its own. for the uniqueness 2.5/5
Next Of Kin 1982
Aussie agua oddness about a young woman returning to her mom’s house and discovering their history. more than a little derivative and a few years too late, it looks and plays like a slow burn tv movie but still manages a few creepy moments. some ill advised music does more harm than good in certain scenes and the print off tubi had strange flanging on parts of the audio. a just enough 3/5
Next Stop, Greenwich Village 1976
comedy drama of twenty something Larry and his adventures with love, friends and family is set in 1950’s NYC. it’s well acted and funny but it meanders and suffers from spending too much time inside the mc’s head instead of with the more interesting supporting cast. lots of familiar faces including Jeff Goldblum and Christopher Walken. written and directed by Paul Mazursky. 3/5
Next Stop Wonderland 1998
Hope Davis shines as the put upon dumpee with mother and dating issues in Brad Anderson’s subtle comedy with indie vibes. it’s very funny and engaging but ultimately a little too cute. there’s a hilarious phone message montage and lots of good lines but my fav exchange was: “Tomorrow night.” “That’s a good time.” the fine cast includes a scorching Cara Buono and a great cameo from Robert Klein. 3/5
Night After Night After Night 1969
pandering British sleaze about a sickie killing prostitutes has inappropriate music and gratuitous nudity but its biggest flaws are an utter lack of suspense and mystery. has a cheap feel that helps but it’s otherwise too timid despite the content- instead of shocking it’s meh at best. 2/5
Night and the City 1956
Richard Widmark and Gene Tierney star in this crime noir about a perennial loser and his get rich quick schemes. despite being set up as a sympathetic character Widmark is hard to root for. with Herbert Lom, some good shadowy scenes and exteriors and a great Francis L. Sullivan. 3/5
Nightbeast 1982
no budget yarn sees an alien vessel crash on earth and the titular monster wreak havoc. bad dialog, acting, fx and editing abound but the sincerity is high and there’s Drago, an overgrown cartoon bully on a motorcycle. a mostly effective score elevates the halfway decent-ish proceedings and there’s no shortage of attractive women. the sheriff and governor were great as was Drago’s fight with Jamie. lame shootouts, hilarious seductions/kissing and more in my fav Dohler joint. 3/5 for the yuks.
The Night Digger 1971
(97 min) extremely annoying film with irritating characters stars Patricia Neal as the put upon daughter of a blind pain in the ass you’ll want to see pushed down the stairs or left out in the rain. a mysterious young man insinuates himself into their household on the pretense of being a handyman gardener. and that ain’t all. the beautiful house and estate makes for an excellent setting but it’s hard to say if the script is wildly unrealistic or if it’s meant to be a satire of the haughty uppercrust. written by Roald Dahl who was apparently a bit of a nutter. not good. 2.5/5
Nightfall 1956
an artist gets tangled up in stolen money when thieves crash his camping trip and an investigator is on the trail. suffers from a lot of exposition but moves spryly and is nicely written otherwise. Aldo Ray and Anne Bancroft lead a fine cast. 3/5
The Night God Screamed 1971
dope loving religious freaks follow some would be George Harrison guru with an indeterminate accent into murder and revenge. grieving widow Fanny is as useless as a parachute in a swimming pool but at least she’s played by one time beauty Jeanne Crain. has a made for tv movie feel enhanced by “The Brady Bunch” setup and a weird ass house which unfortunately is not well utilized as the film is blandly shot. the decent score and overall schlock factor combine in an agreeably ’70s fashion, even managing a few creepy moments but the abundance of ludicrousness takes all the edges off. while fairly grim, the script seems to have been condensed as what really would’ve made for an interesting twist is given short shrift. contains great dialog like “die die die die die” and “guilty guilty guilty guilty guilty.” not too bad; try it if you crave a vintage low budget thriller with lots of offscreen violence. 2.5/5
Nightmares 1986
anthology of four tales of terror I hadn’t seen since it aired on cable concerns an escaped maniac, a punk rocking videogame addict, a more spiritual version of Spielberg’s “Duel” and a bickering couple with a rat problem. certainly of its time but not bad although the last segment gets goofy. with Emilio Estevez, Richard Masur, Lance Henrikson, Albert Hague and many more. mostly entertaining but points off for whatever happened in that snake scene. 2.5/5
Nikutai no mon/Gate of Flesh 1964
a gang of female hustler/pickpocket/prostitutes in war torn Tokyo navigate cops, GIs and rival factions in this Japanese drama. they are war widows and the forgotten turned survivors, most having lost everything and staying united under a strict code: any kind of compassion or romantic love is cause for torture and expulsion. when a thug veteran on the run wanders into their midst the women’s loyalties are tested. there’s nudity, violence and kink but this ain’t no sleazefest- it’s way too dark and depressing even during the scant sex scenes. while occasionally haunting, the more theatrical touches are tone jarring and some curious musical choices often lend an inappropriate comedic touch. the film looks great with plenty of color and terrific sets and lighting, especially the darkened alleys and the women’s hideout. warning: contains what looked to me like an actual cow being killed and butchered but I looked away for most of it. 3/5
Noite vazia 1964
two bored, well to do “young” men cruise the clubs (and Japanese restaurants) of Sao Paulo drinking and looking for kicks. one is hot tempered and crude while the other laid-back and pensive. they find their reflections in two working girls and spend the night in a hotel room as an air of gloom hangs over the debauchery. there are cool glimpses of nightlife with awesome live music dance halls and jazz bars while the evocative score provides an intense intro and creates unease during intimate moments. the b+w picture looked okay but the audio was compressed; quiet sections were very hissy due to seemingly no room tone which is strange because the sound design was otherwise excellent. directed by Walter Hugo Khouri with shades of his later films, this drama with psychological flourishes appeared to be commenting on amoral youth. not among my faves of his but 3/5.
Non Stop 2017
Neeson vehicle about an air marshall facing a plane full of suspected terrorists is taut and twisty. it’s also a bit contrived and believe it or not preachy but quite diverting. 3/5
No One Lives 2012
cardboard action revenger has depth- the hero is not simply resourceful and some of the scum villains are scummier than others. although trite with a capital contrived, it looks good, there are twists enough and plenty of grue but the amateur hour cast does it all no favors. 2.5/5
Nosferatu 2024
frustratingly inconsistent telling isn’t weird, intense or scary enough to overcome that same one step forward, one step back approach. while the score and sound design are both excellent, the unfortunate script choices and uneven photography are par for the halfway course: too often pedestrian, adding neither mystery nor menace. even scenes that should be creepy were done no favors by an intentionally soft look. instead of a stylish tour de force we’re left with half a (single camera) captured stageplay with none of the advantages of modern moviemaking- fine if your material justifies it. here it’s mostly neutered by it. if I didn’t know better I’d say Eggers made the exact movie I didn’t want to see- a dramatic tragedy within a horror framework. 2.5/5
Not Of This Earth 1957
low budget but brisk yarn about space invading vampires with deadly eyes who use pumps and beakers rather than fangs. works fairly well with a creepy Lovecraftian villain but the flying shower cap was too goofy. the cast is fine and the film’s not bad for what it is so a razor thin 3/5
No Way To Treat A Lady 1969
Rod Steiger gives a great performance as the twisted serial strangler in this mystery thriller that’s not enough of either to be worthwhile. George Segal is the smitten cop who develops a bond with the wacko while Lee Remick is asked to be both unlikable and endearing, which she does somehow manage. Segal’s mother is irritating and the film tries to be a love story on top of the showcase for Steiger it should’ve stayed. passable but not much more. 2.5/5
Nude… si muore/Naked You Die 1968
(dubbed) fairly tame tale of a killer stalking a girls’ school has good color and locations but is not exciting or suspenseful. the sometimes groovy soundtrack can also be oddly pervasive and some of the dubbed performances were poor. not bad but not very good either. 2.5/5

O

The October Man 1947
British yarn about a man with a cracked skull and a cloudy memory who may be a murderer. slight mystery has appealing leads and good nighttime photography including a neat foggy park. nothing earth shattering but moves nicely except for the Pythonesque train station scene. 3/5
Oddity 2024
a shrink whose wife was murdered finds himself out of his element in this beautifully filmed and produced slowburn from Ireland. has its share of creepy moments and then some but tho the acting is uneven the score/sound design is very good at enhancing dread. supernatural mystery that’s gorgeous to behold has a lot going for it but isn’t perfect so only 3/5
Olivia aka A Taste Of Sin 1983
stylish and bizarre character study of a deranged woman is dark and creepy with plenty of moodiness and an effective soundtrack. there’s an odd twist about the old and new London bridges and karma or fate or maybe it was just weird. far from perfect or even coherent but I liked it anyway. 3/5
Opening Night 1977
dark John Cassavetes’ written and directed Gena Rowlands vehicle about an aging Broadway star is well acted and interestingly shot. it’s also emotionally raw and sometimes offputting due to its stylish form which can be claustrophobic and even creepy. the excellent cast includes Ben Gazarra but Rowlands dominates. 3.5/5
Osobisty pamietnik grzesznika przez niego samego spisany aka Memoirs of a Sinner 1986
Wojciech Has’ cynical fantasy has elements of horror but is more concerned with surreal philosphical debates on human identity. recalls Greek tragedy, Dostoyevsky (esp “The Brothers Karamazov”) and “The Picture of Dorian Gray” but despite gorgeous sets and locations and an immersive score I didn’t enjoy this as much as I wanted to. a lot to like but 2.5/5
Otesanek aka Little Otik 2000
beyond bizarre Svankmajer tale bordering on folk horror about a childless couple who go off the deep end in their need for a surrogate. after a hysterically wacko start, things get the not as funny kind of wacko and stay that way before really going bye bye. and pervy, as in sexualizing young Alzbetka, who is excellent here and the heart of the film. otherwise, I liked the sound design, the nine pillows and the thorough craziness but not the ickiness, cat mistreatment or the tree stump genitalia. or does icky cover those last two things also? lots of food, lots of closeups of mouths, lots of porridges and soups, lots of choices but my fave line has to be the wife questioning if her husband loves their baby: “When was the last time you varnished him?” 2.5/5 because of the aforementioned skeeviness; definitely higher without. maybe there’s a less yucky, slightly edited version.

P

The Pack 1977
Joe Don Baker stars as St. Roch in just what I was in the mood for: a ’70s cheasefest, this one about wild dogs on an isolated tourist island. filled with wannabe domestic drama fare, annoying future dog chow characters and possible animal endangerment with some of the pooches looking mangy and very aggressive. beautiful scenery and superior nighttime photography along with its stormy atmosphere go far but this stinks too deeply to do much more. some blood but lots of slo mo too although Tommy’s run toward the cliff was hilarious. if you’re hard up for animals attacking you can do worse. 2/5
Parapsycho: Spektrum der angst/Spectrum of Fear 1973
paranormal anthology from Germany is barely coherent but manages a timeless feel from a variety of sets and outdoor locations which are all used very well. there’s a typewriter, nudity and unsexy sex in this talky but stylish silliness that gets its money’s worth out of that Beethoven piece and soft focus lenses. in addition to a great electronic score there’s lots of lurid cheapness, some surreal moments and what looked like an actual autopsy (yuck). with Marisa Mell. 2/5
Paroxismus aka Venus In Furs 1969
weirdass Franco stuff about a washed up corpse and a trumpet buried in the sand. colorful, unfortunately narrated and intermittently interesting, it’s fairly typical of the director: plenty of moments that work and plenty that perplex. filler footage and ineffective slow motion detract while startling compositions and Franco’s eye for style keep you from falling asleep. a kind 2.5/5
Patayin mo sa sindak si Barbara/Kill Barbara With Panic 1974
(dark, likely 4:3 print) alternately subtle and bold Filipino horror about a wronged woman’s ghost exacting revenge has a creepy doll, flying objects and weird use of the English language. while it’s atmospheric and utilizes its locations well, a few scenes go too long and it’s all a bit tv movie-ish despite the edginess. otoh, there are effectively surreal moments and quite a few lovely ladies to sweeten the deal. 3/5
Pena de muerte/Death Penalty aka Violent Bloodbath 1974
a prosecutor sees a connection between a string of murders and old cases over which he presided in this Spanish/Italian psychological crime drama directed by Jorge Grau. bordering on giallo, the film wraps the past and present together effectively and is well shot with good color and varied locations. starring Fernando Rey and Marissa Mell. 3/5
Pengabdi setan/Satan’s Slave 1980
slightly preachy Indonesian horror about a family who loses their mother only to see their house become possessed by evil spirits. there’s quite a bit about keeping god in your life and home to ward off evil. there’s also an almost direct ripoff of the bedroom window scene in 1978’s “‘Salem’s Lot” and while most of the ghostly undead were well realized the film is not without a few silly moments ie Herman’s fangs. the climax is also poorly staged and edited but cool music, terrific use of locations, very good lighting and the overall weirdness make it watchable. an imperfect 3/5
Perempuan tanah jahanam aka Impetigore 2019
two young women escape their unsatisfying lives to visit a remote village where secrecy and superstition reign. most of the film looks quite good as do sets and locations, especially the graveyard and abandoned house. except for a few moments it’s not very scary but still intriguing and fairly well paced and acted tho I found the sequel ending cliched. 3/5
The Photographer 1974
sicko mama’s boy likes to mix business with pleasure in this tastelessly unpleasant shocker. a sort of ’70s drive in “Peeping Tom” features horny widows and an over the top lead in Michael Callan who has at least one easily solvable problem: instead of killing the inexplicable amount of attractive women who throw themselves at him and then crying, just have sex with them. anything but subtle, there’s an attempt at pathos with weird music plus a far more watchable investigative subplot featuring Edward Andrews and Harold J. Stone. with Isabel Sanford in a bit role. an effectively grim, barely more good than bad 3/5.
Picture Mommy Dead 1968
(faded p+s) a terrific start erased by a ludicrous score sets a low bar over which slinks the script for Don Ameche and not enough Zsa Zsa Gabor thrills. poor ?little? Susan comes home from the convent a bit prematurely to a house of horrors and more dolls and paintings than she can handle. rotten characters, lurid shocks and child endangerment are plusses but it’s too talky with a flawed structure to boot. a soft 2.5/5
Plague 1979
low budget thriller sees a bio lab mishap create a super germ that escapes and causes mass casualties. trouble is, those involved weren’t up to the task at hand either financially or creatively so this is a half baked exercise that plays like a decent tv movie. poorly paced third rate “Andromeda Strain” has trippy music and an effectively grim tone but isn’t taut or clever enough to overcome its limitations. 2.5/5
The Plague of the Zombies 1966
this Hammer production about an epidemic in a small village at least has some not too brightly lit scenes and Diane Clare going for it. it’s otherwise lacking in atmosphere, tension and excitement plus the zombies look goofy. 2.5/5
Point Blank 1967
Lee Marvin is a one man wrecking crew out for his money in Boorman’s violent actioner. not subtle but gritty and colorful enough to overcome its flawed presentation. with Angie Dickinson and John Vernon. a barely there 3/5
Polowanie na muchy aka Hunting Flies 1969
a philanderer falls for a chatty younger student but finds himself the one caught in this surreal Polish romantic drama. the film is colorful, absurd and creepy by turns with a knowingly twisted sense of humor. definitely different. 3/5
Possum 2018
striking imagery and a paranoid narrative elevate this inscrutable character study of a man with love/hate relationships, one with a puppet. nightmare logic and creepy sets and lighting combine with an intense score to unnerve but the film is more an examination of traumatic suffering than anything else; horror indeed just not my fav cinematic type. reminded me a bit of “Harpya” at times. 3/5 ymmv
Post Mortem 2020
(dubbed) a cadaver portraitist finds plenty of subjects when he accompanies an enigmatic child to her village. groans and thumps, shadowy creepies and ghostly forces that grab and drag the living abound in this Hungarian spookfest. the photography is understated yet beautiful with gorgeous natural surroundings while the shock elements are handled well. a bit muddled but visually arresting. 3/5
Pozegnania/Farewells aka Lydia Ate the Apple 1958
a pair of unhappy young people- a somber student and a desperate dancehall girl- run off together in an early full length drama from Has. like many geographically similar films of its time the script becomes increasingly concerned with politics and war, in this case to its detriment as the romance of the two leads was to me far more interesting. speaking of, I liked their “honeymoon” suite but not their disrespect for cats. a soft 3/5
Prazske noci/Prague Nights 1969
surreal Czech horror fantasy from a trio of directors tells three tales ranging from lighthearted with dark undertones to full on creepy. my favorite was the intense golem segment but each was terrifically photographed with lots of atmosphere and excellent use of sets and natural locations. some scenes were very dark which was fine as it suited the proceedings. perhaps not the most profound film but the striking visuals and fantastical elements are the stars here. 3.5/5
Preacherman 1971
(faded p+s) did you hear the one about the preacher and the farmer’s daughter? cartoonish Carolina quickie about a randy preacher is leering, creepy and gross mostly since it successfully portrays the titular rapist character as the predator he is. funny, right? not even a little bit since besides being tastelessly cruel it’s statically shot and talky, the “sheriff and deputy” duo are horrendously unconvincing and the “humor” painful. Ilene Kristen as poor Mary Lou is worth a thousand times the price of admission, however. she’s perfectly cast as a simple, sinful young thing exploited by almost everyone but none more so than by the vile preacher since he betrays her mind, body and soul. and what a body. altho the film is appropriately cynical, it’s too tame to be as mean as its core and too icky to be as goofy as it plays. god’s eyewater indeed. 1.5/5
Preacherman Meets Widderwoman 1973
(widescreen!) even worse if possible than the first insult is this dishearteningly unfunny sequel, thankfully only released regionally so the rest of us now have the internet to blame for access. although the soft, drab image can be attributed to the scarcity of the print, nothing can excuse the trope trawling script, aimless direction, ulcerous male performances and static staging. I knew I was gonna hate it just like I knew I was gonna watch it as soon as I heard of it and it didn’t disappoint. a kind 1/5 for the women and the sheriff and deputy who were somehow mildly amusing this go around.
Pretty Poison 1968
a delusional man drags a troubled teen into his fantasies but finds his made up world just as hard to cope with. as a black comedy drama it’s not bad but entirely unbelievable; perhaps if the two leads had appeared closer than their eleven year age difference or had any measurable chemistry it would’ve played better. starring Anthony Perkins and Tuesday Weld. 2.5/5
Prey aka Alien Prey 1977
Mr. Anderson from London stumbles upon two lesbians in a remote estate and shakes things up a bit. you see, he’s a vampiric alien with a love of champagne and an aversion to water and vegetables. he also kills quite often, be it cop or bird, as he carries out his orders in this weird British slow burn scifi drama that plays like an hour long idea padded with softcore bedroom action. there’s a little gore and other than a few drab interiors it’s mostly well filmed with especially colorful outdoor scenes. there’s a beautiful mansion and sun room, a psychedelically ridiculous afternoon swim and a very odd dinner party. Glory Annen and Barry Stokes. 3/5
Professione: Reporter aka The Passenger 1975
beautifully filmed but ruthlessly uninteresting Antonioni drama about a reporter (Jack Nicholson) who takes a dead man’s identity. has that perfect blend of easy detachment, mild diversion and shallow boredom making for an insomniac’s dream. 2.5/5
Puppet On A Chain 1972
crime drama about heroin on the streets of Holland boasts good use of varied locations and a fine cast. it’s fairly well written plus there’s Barbara Parkins and a loooooong boat chase. a soft 3/5

Q

Quelqu’un derrière la porte/Someone Behind the Door 1971
Anthony Perkins is a shrink treating amnesiac Charles Bronson in this mostly successful mystery. it’s odd seeing Bronson as the unnamed, good-natured dupe, as he spends his time wandering around in a daze asking questions either angrily or timidly. Perkins is entertaining to watch while Jill Ireland does well with little as both the victim and the absolver. diverting if a tad goofy. 3/5

R

Rabitto hora 3d aka Tormented 2011
horror fantasy about a boy who commits a mercy killing is alternately childish and creepy, clumsy and unsettling. an odd stew of theater, independent filmmaking and traditional scares, it uses a multitude of blink and you’ll miss em fx which all help to blur the line between dreams and reality. surreal flourishes, expansive and often unusual sets and locations seal the deal but, just like in actual dreams/nightmares, that illogical flow can be frustrating. 2.5/5 ymmv
Rapina 1975
Carlos Enrique Taboada’s story of poor villagers who find a crashed plane in the mountains and discover greed. and worse. the simplicity of the characters lives and their childish awe at the riches they discover are in stark contrast to the depths to which they eventually sink. although mostly a drama, there are several scenes embodying horror. good performances, beautiful natural locations and a very cool miniature fx sequence round out this sad tale. with Ignacio Lopez Tarso and German Robles. 3.5/5
Rattlers 1976
opening with a child endangering homerun, despite the didactic, socially conscious turn things stay fairly cruel if lame and ridiculous in this killer snakes on the loose crap. a “photographer” follows around a “doctor” but forgets to bring her camera. unless it was offscreen along with the gore. doc is played by Sam Chew because I guess David Hartman turned it down. the print was as bland as the script/performances but among a few gooduns was this one, asked to the hand percussion voodoo click clack sound that was supposed to be a rattlesnake: “Is that you dad?” 1.5/5 for the laughs.
Ready Or Not 2019
deep dive into black comedy horror sees a young bride get more than she bargained for on game night with the new family. like “The Menu,” you’re either in or you’re out. here I was more out than in but the film was committed enough for both of us. since it’s not very funny or incisive it should’ve stuck to horror. overblown, overplayed and not overly good. 2.5/5
The Reckless Moment 1949
a woman goes to great lengths to cover up the death of her daughter’s boyfriend in this fairly well shot mystery with Joan Bennett and James Mason. they’re very good but the film is nothing special. an anemic 3/5
Redneck Miller 1976
“Where’s my shirt?!” low budget N Carolina goofiness about Supermac, Preacher etc and Miller the redneck dj. seems someone stole his chopper and ripped off a drug dealer’s shipment. although the acting is expectedly poor and the villains laughably inept, the film is decently shot and scored and the ladies are attractive. loads of laughs, lame fights and winning dialog but at least everyone involved cared enough to try. possibly sponsored by Schlitz. a dumb fun 3/5
Rekopis znaleziony w Saragossie aka The Saragossa Manuscript 1965
(182 min version) an old book captures the imagination of two soldiers in Has’ adaptation of the difficult novel by Polish author Jan Potocki written in French but set in Spain. got all that? sprawling historical film with fantastic elements and stories within stories format recalls “Don Quixote” while it encompasses horror, romance, comedy and adventure. lots of Has touches like surreal natural landscapes, unusual sound design and score and a dreamlike flow suit this timeshifting tale of tales. 3/5
Remember My Name 1978
Geraldine Chaplin is once again amazing as a weirdo in this revenge tale of unresolved feelings and the darker side of love and obsession. Anthony Perkins is the married man with secrets Chaplin seems intent on harassing. she’s sad and scary, fragile and ferocious while the film is funny and challenging, playing like some sort of true crime romance mystery. written and directed by Alan Rudolph, it also stars Jeff Goldblum and Alfre Woodard. karma’s a bitch. 3/5
Repeat Performance 1947
a guilt ridden woman goes full “Groundhog Day” in this sci fi noir directed by Alfred Werker. intriguing mystery is well filmed with a smart script while the fine cast includes an appealing Joan Leslie and a deplorable John Hayward. 3.5/5
Rise aka Rise: Blood Hunter 2007
besides the admittedly titanic appeal of both Lucy Liu and Carla Gugino ca ’07 this is not a good movie. the presentation is sorely misguided and disjointed, the script borderline superfluous and Miss Gugino has far too little screentime. though some scenes are captured quite well most of it plays like a tvm despite the content. the intermittent moments that are actually effective make the rest that much more lacking. fwiw, a reporter stumbles onto a cult only to find herself killed and on a mission. a prime example of the pitch coming before the story: Lucy Liu undead! with a crossbow! tldr- what a waste of some beautiful women. 2/5
Riverboat Mama aka Muddy Mama 1969
(faded) oh boy. sometimes even I wonder why I watch this kind of “stuff.” Bob Favorite brings us the softcore porno story of singing trafficker Diamond Mack Blackjack and the genetically blessed Maude played by Morganna. their interminable “tryst” is beyond description. the other sex scenes (there are a loooooot of them) are just as phony but they are at least in the same general universe as human. ultra cheap lameness offers plenty of laughs but unfortunately the focus is on skin not script, and that’s definitely not a knock on the ladies. think Milligan meets Meyer with music by those guys down the street who have a song that sounds kinda like acoustic Led Zeppelin. a few nicely composed scenic shots are probably the only example of any technical merit here although the cast is fairly game, especially whoever played Tim Sweetbreath. “yup. men and money.” 1.5/5
Robinson Crusoe 1954
(dull likely p+s) directed by Luis Bunuel, this version is not as good as the book. neither are any of the other versions I’ve seen but here Crusoe’s a not-good pet owner and friend to boot. the print’s color was wildly inconsistent and though not a knock on the film itself was par for the meh course. the kink this time was thankfully subdued and it’s all not bad per se but not that good either. 2.5/5
Rolling Thunder 1977
William Devane leads a deep cast in another rural “Death Wish” but he’s not even a gardener here, just a sympathetic, respectful Joe who can’t catch a break unless it’s a bone. too bad he and costar Tommy Lee Jones didn’t switch roles. well, actually it’s too bad the script isn’t any good but that’s asking too much. it’s otherwise competently made if underplayed to its detriment. 2.5/5
Ruslan i Lyudmila 1972
lavish Russian adventure fantasy sees the beautiful bride Lyudmila kidnapped and a quest to rescue her. filled with imaginative sets, surreal and pleasantly theatrical moments, it’s part opera, part historical drama and part comedy. though colorful, the film sometimes had a slightly soft, muted quality but that might’ve been the print. sections of dialog were in rhyming form which made for some awkward translations. presented in two parts, I definitely enjoyed the first part more despite the second part’s beheadings and the roaring wizard dwarf in a sack. 3/5
Ruusujen aika aka A Time of Roses 1969
a researcher finds the perfect woman to recreate a long dead model’s tragic circumstances in this odd, politically mindful Finnish fantasy. there are some striking shots but just as much debating technological versus social progress. apparently the near future is surveillance, weird dancing, inflatable furniture and more of the same old same old: people suck. 2.5/5

S

Sakura no mori no mankai no shita aka Under the Blossoming Cherry Trees 1975
a murderous mountain brute takes a beautiful city woman for a bride only to find her very high maintenance. and totally bonkers. but so it seems is everyone else, and after a while the eventually “urbanized” road thief is the only one left questioning his world. very odd film both borders on and revels in horror in ways subtle and blood spurting. I for one couldn’t find anything remotely unsettling in the cherry tree landscapes but to the film’s credit the climax among them is haunting and the mc’s fear was palpable. lots of beheadings. 3.5/5
Samoa, regina della giungla/Samoa, Queen of the Jungle 1968
fairly well filmed exotic adventure about diamonds in the jungle is stupid and filled with mismatched footage, interminable gunfights and lame fistfights. but listen, it’s Edwige Fenech as a jungle queen. what else matters? oh yeah Femi Benussi and Ivy Holzer. otherwise as lame as expected and not nearly enough Edwige. 2/5
Sangue per Dracula/Blood For Dracula 1974
(harshly red-tinted version off tubi) Udo Kier plays a more passive and formal count in Paul Morrisey’s very odd, over the top take on the story. this Dracula can apparently see himself in a mirror (though no one else can) and goes about in daylight even as he travels with his coffin and assistant. and he might die because virgin blood is really hard to come by unless you’ve got a good bread guy. questionable dialog delivered uniformly poorly, miles of petulant complaining, unerotic sex/nudity and an often out of place score all add up to high entertainment value. as cheapo as the whole thing is, the sets and locations are good and there is enough artistry to make one wonder what might have been if they had only had more time/money. another film billed in the US as “Andy Warhol’s,” this one isn’t good but it’s much better than his “Bad.” with Joe “hawz” Dallesandro and a cameo by Roman Polanski. 3/5 if you go for this campy Euro-weirdness; otherwise 2/5
Sanpo suru reikyusha aka The Glamorous Ghost 1964
stylishly shot crime drama mystery about greedy people has a good cast and moves well. it also has a comedic touch that wasn’t to my liking and an unfortunate score but the story is twisty enough to overcome it. a solid 3/5
Sarajin bam aka The Vanished 2018
a man kills his wife only to learn her body has disappeared from the morgue in this Korean mystery. everything looks great, the twisty script has some tense moments but the multiple flashbacks are to the film’s detriment and it may be too clever for its own good. a more to like than not 3/5
The Satan Bug 1965
a biological weapon is stolen from a high tech lab and the search is on. tv staple George Maharis is good as the take charge investigator but it’s an hour long idea stretched into nearly two so definitely not must see. it’s mostly well filmed with great ’60s color plus the cast includes Anne Francis. 2.5/5
Satan’s Slave 1976
after an intro you’d hope was lifelessly dubbed, a woman survives a “crash” in her uncle’s driveway only to find herself worse off in the house. cheap, sporadically gory thriller has Michael Gough and Martin Potter as British sickos involved in very bad deeds. underneath all the stabbings, ancient rituals, descendants and premonitions with swirly, twinkly music it manages some atmosphere and the locations are well utilized. it’s often flatly filmed tho, and the score is cheapsville while the costumes are fine except for uncle who looks like a gameshow contestant. beside Candace Glendenning and Barbara Kellerman it’s mostly el stinko but good to fall asleep to. 2/5
Saturn 3 1980
Farrah Fawcett (top billed!) and Kirk Douglas see their isolated research station invaded by Harvey Keitel playing, what else, a wackjob, this time with a terminator-like cyborg in tow. odd mix of sci fi and horror is also a mix of big and medium budget as well as late ’70s and early ’80s filmmaking styles. adding to the weirdness is Keitel’s dubbed voice and alien performance. the sets and fx are good but the lighting is better, easily elevating the whole production to the next level, and the score is effective. a bit tame despite the R rating, the film borrows heavily from other, better ones (“Star Wars Silent Running Demon Seed Frankenstein Alien”) and even with its plot holes still manages to be a decent little thriller. 2.5/5, higher if you’re hard up.
The Savage Bees 1976
tvm set during mardi gras about, yup, killer bees and the sheriff who wants justice for his dog is dreadfully boring. although the bees are killer the film moves at a snail’s pace, making the viewer the real victim. other than a few stung-up corpses this is snooze central. 2/5
Savage Intruder aka Hollywood Horror House 1970
(imdb lists 1970 but the end credits say 1973) this creepy weird throwback stars Miriam Hopkins as a faded star whose estate takes in a hippie druggie psycho. the glorious late ’60s color and filmmaking style makes an intermittently effective marriage with the bloody violence typical of the coming era’s nihilism but there’s too much of the previous decade’s baggage for the film to go full bore. the mind games/power struggles are fairly tame, the cruelty is on a leash and the manse isn’t particularly well utilized. it’s fairly dark and gory but not very suspenseful or even believable. still, it’s bizarre and goofy with trippy psychedelic drug sequences, over the top melodrama and shockfare luridness that’s unfortunately not very shocking. featuring a cool baphomet poster. 2.5/5 for the wasted potential but ymmv
The Scarlet Hour 1956
well acted noir sees an unhappily married woman and her lover stumble into a robbery plot. the lovely Carol Ohmart’s film debut, it looks good and moves briskly with smart dialog. 3/5
Scary Stories To Tell In The Dark 2019
decently creepy tale of teens who draw a ghost’s wrath after breaking into its childhood home suffers from the usual victims doing dumb things and at least one cardboard villain. good lighting and makeup/fx help but this could’ve been much better if it perhaps aimed for an audience older than its protagonists. a very weak 3/5
Schamlos 1968
after his popular stripper girlfriend is killed, a low level hood (Udo Keir) turns into Columbo in this less than thrilling crime drama. flatly filmed in b+w, it’s a cheap, sleazy international production with people dancing to unusual music, a monumentally unappealing “party” and enough unpleasantness to cancel out all the schone frauen. 2.5/5
Schizo 1976
top shelf trash from good old Pete Walker, the British Terry Bourke (neither known for their subtlety), about a loon stalking an ice skater played by the lovely Lynne Frederick. stuffed with lurid “shocks,” nonsense spouting dunderheads, a brash score and of course an entire cast who don’t believe the mc until it’s too late. the villain is not only so stealthy as to be undetectable he’s practically immaterial as well. there’s good color and lighting but it’s mostly for naught as this stinks despite a freaky “seance.” 2/5
School For Scoundrels 1960
although he runs his own business with four employees, to become a “success” clumsy, gullible and persistently pushed around Henry attends a school in how to manipulate others. with the help of a hairy Alastair Sim he turns the tables on a predatory associate and a pair of unscrupulous salesmen. while not without some laughs the film is too often tedious, ill paced and the humor too broad. and that’s saying nothing of Mary, the object of Henry and his rival’s affections. is she naive or opportunistic? either way she’s not so much a character as a shiny trophy. an extremely attractive shiny trophy but an object just the same. an ok 3/5 for Janette Scott and the throw your hands in the air ending.
Secret Ceremony 1968
very strange drama sees Elizabeth Taylor cross paths with a very strange Mia Farrow and a repugnant Robert Mitchum. well filmed with the expansive house making for varied sets and the shifty script keeps things interesting up to a point. how soon that point is reached will vary for each viewer; mine was just before it ended. a very flawed 3/5
Segretissimo aka Top Secret 1967
(dubbed) Spanish Italian spy stuff starts off with a great song and generously continues with surreal audio but the film is slow and spoofy. lots of local flavor from the varied locations and the women are attractive including Polish beauty Madga Konopka who kicks butt so there’s that. otherwise boing. 2.5/5
Seijû gakuen aka The Transgressor akaSchool of the Holy Beast 1974
well filmed but soapy Japanese nunsploitation has it all: rape, bondage, girl girl stuff, rows of sisters made up like mummies for bedtime, catfights in full habit garb, topless whippings and sadistic nuns into some freaky shit. it even manages arthouse aspirations and yet still doesn’t satisfy. it’s oh so blasphemous and offensive etc but it’s also unaffecting. 2.5/5
Serenade fur zwie spione/Serenade For Two Spies 1965
(dub) German spy spoof that’s amusing if too obvious sees agent 006-and-a-half dance, swim and smoke his way in and out of mild danger as he chases a stolen megaweapon. globe trotting parody is well filmed with good color but wears out its welcome since it’s too much spoof and not enough spy. on account of the many beautiful women, a generous 2.5/5
Se zhong e gui aka Evil Seducers 1975
young man would rather drink and pursue a strange woman and her servant than agree to an arranged marriage in another Shaw brothers female ghost tale. everything looks good and the cast is game; the film even manages some suspense and atmosphere but imo these stories were done better a decade or more earlier. 2.5/5
The Shadow of the Cat 1961
beautifully filmed Hammer thriller about a murdered woman’s cat is silly and overwrought but great shadowy sets go a long way. since most all the humans are detestable, rooting for the kitty is a given. kudos for not casting a black cat as Tabitha. 2.5/5 for the photography.
Sharky’s Machine 1981
Burt Reynolds cop vehicle sees him busted from narcotics down to vice only to stumble onto a political coverup. a good cast including Henry Silva as a drugged out hitman livens things up and the soundtrack is decent but pacing issues kill the action and the resulting comedy/drama is uneven. lots of shouting, shooting and surveillance. liked it as a teen- not so much today. I guess it takes more than Rachel Ward in spandex. 2.5/5
Shatter 1974
Stuart Whitman stars in this sub standard crime drama with a lot of fights, often goofily scored, and varied locations but not even some gore and Peter Cushing can liven this up past mediocre. 2.5/5
Shen jian dong shan he aka Thrilling Bloody Sword 1981
(dirty but otherwise fine print off yt) demented Chinese action flick is a psychedelic sword and sorcery horror stew, running the gamut of vfx both practical and cartoonish but part of that mashup approach includes silliness and pratfalls. two wizards try to gain control of the kingdom while a princess and her seven dwarves fathers ah what’s the point? take some excellent sets and lighting, creative production design, fairy tales and kaiju with awesome monsters and I guess you get this fantasy/lunacy for the drive in crowd. the suitably eclectic score touches on funk, treacle and a decidedly ’70s Mangione inspired theme. filmed in an unusual way, it manages to be both old fashioned and contemporary with a color scheme that sometimes resembles colorization. bonkers fun. 3/5
Shriek of the Mutilated 1974
perfectly awful cheapie with a hilarious score and wretched performances tells of a sadistic professor who has a habit of endangering his students via a yeti. students including Spencer, a real party animal with a winning personality and a bit of a drinking problem. throw in some cannibalism and you got a stew goin because this demented crapsterpiece is the gift that keeps on giving! containing plenty of attractive women somehow, it plays like a 50’s era psa or corporate training video with offscreen violence and a yeti that makes the gremlin from “Nightmare At 20000 Feet” look like a Rick Baker award winner. it succeeds the way some low budget horror movies do by being the right combination of weird and inept. it also fails, however, the same way some low budget horror movies do by being poorly paced and stupid. featuring the unbelievable Laughing Crow, fantastic salad, a leg on the table, John Carpenter lookalike Karl, a party with a popcorn vending machine and more. not a total loss for hard up horror completists with one or two near miss moments and setpieces that border on the real deal, if only for a few seconds. anything beyond that is ruined by the public domain score. directed by pornster Michael Findlay. for the laughs a hairy 3/5
Shinkansen daibakuha/Bullet Train 1975
(dubbed US version) train-set Japanese precursor to “Speed” sees a relatively ethical bomber try to stay one step ahead of police. a lot of action takes place in a control room so big they need binoculars. even an edited version of this fairly intelligent thriller is too long but good miniatures and a cool jazz fusion soundtrack helps. with Shin’ichi (Sonny) Chiba. a benevolent 3/5
Silent Running 1972
sci fi tale of an astronaut charged with running a spacebound biodome who takes drastic measures to protect it. Bruce Dern is good in the role but the script focuses on his interactions with the ship and its robots more than the flora and fauna of his beloved forest, instead detailing his motivations in the form of passionate speeches. other than some regrettable musical choices and an almost postcoital surgical finale, there are mostly fine vfx, miniatures and lively androids along with good lighting and color. I also enjoyed the ironic but satisfying ending. with product placements for Coca Cola, Dow, American Airlines and Ditch Witch. directed by Douglas Trumbull. 3/5
The Single Girls aka Private School aka Bloody Friday 1973
oy. beyond stupid “comedy/horror” about young people at a hippie sex camp from Mr. and Mrs. Sebastian is known by multiple names but stinks no matter what you call it. had they stuck to horror, who knows, they might’ve accidentally made a cheapo classic. Claudia Jennings leads an attractive cast and the rent-a-funk score is fine, especially the patriotic theme song, but the tedium sorely outpaces the few good moments and the ending is a head scratcher. laughs abound however, like every time Blue is onscreen and the mellow emcee, but the highlight for me was the ?singing? bellydancer scene which was definitely worthy of a rewind. speaking of Blue, c’mon dude, really? even if your lady’s fantasy ain’t your thing, you made a promise. just man up already! sheesh. with Albert Popwell and Robyn Hilton. tho it did the trick, 2/5 despite the yuks
Six Pack Annie 1975
“bang bang the good times bang when Annie comes bangin’ around.” oh if only that were true. this low iq budget Florida redneck farce is also low on sleaze despite everything including bombshell Annie played by Lindsay Bloom. complete with idiot sheriff, horndog locals, amusing songs and typical of the genre yuks. but dig those Dr. Peppers in vintage glass bottles! 1.5/5
Skateboard 1978
we’re gonna zoom-a-zoom oh wait a minute this is different. what a simpler time it was when you could make “movies” like this with those easy California sunshine vibes and no script. a gambler gets skateboarding kids to compete in a contest so he can pay off his debts. cue the slow motion skating and ridiculously lame music. some of the kids are quite good on their little wheels but nothing could be good enough to salvage this teen craze cash-in slop. with Allen Garfield and Leif Garrett. 1.5/5
Sleep, My Love 1948
shadowy all star mystery directed by Douglas Sirk sees wealthy Claudette Colbert victimized by some greedy people. the snappy script is a bit contrived but it’s all so slick it doesn’t matter. featuring a smoky Hazel Brooks, an awesome “jungle” and lots of unclosed doors. 3.5/5
Sleepwalk 1986
odd lo budget comedy fantasy is poorly acted but at least has a splendid Ann Magnuson and tho it plays like a student film some scenes are very well photographed. a young woman who accepts a job translating a rare manuscript finds her reality more and more surreal but it’s the viewer left wondering. as in what happened to the script? co written and directed by Sara Driver with camerawork by Jim Jarmusch. 2.5/5
The Smallest Show On Earth 1957
a man and his wife decide to fix up his great uncle’s dilapidated movie theater in this minor British comedy. silly and a bit broad but not unlikable with Peter Sellers as an alcoholic projectionist. a slight 3/5
The Snorkel 1958
a sicko kills his wife while his stepdaughter tries to prove it in this well filmed Hammer production. fine sets and locations but the largely tame treatment does the dark story no favors. still, it works well enough and the cast (and dog) are good. 3/5
The Snowdropper 1975
strange British tv movie about a fugitive finding refuge in a desperate Welsh woman’s cottage is intriguing, tense and cruel. twisty drama keeps pulling the rug out from under you as the characters shift from predatory to sympathetic while the politically charged script isn’t pretty today let alone when this was made. 3.5/5
Sole Survivor 1970
playing like a lost TZ episode, this tvm of a downed fighter plane and its ghostly crew awaiting discovery is loosely based on a true story. it wisely centers on the sympathetic plight of the deceased soldiers, even becoming creepy at times, but the script is a bit contrived. otherwise it’s well acted and staged. 3/5
Sole Survivor 1994
a woman survives a plane crash only to find her world unraveling in this dreamlike thriller that’s miles from perfect but engages nonetheless. has a low budget oddness that works in its favor with an effective score but leaves many unanswered questions. 3/5
Some Call It Loving 1973
Zalman King plays a man at a carnival who picks up a dollar-a kiss comatose woman “sleeping beauty” in this odd future fodder for Cinemax late nite. he plays the sax, there’s Star Trek eye lighting, loads of “romance” and tons of whispering but the only thing getting stiff here is the acting. basically a well produced and scored amateur hour project, it’s hard to say if it’s pretentious or just inept but this “erotic” moodpiece is too timid to be morbid or kinky and too boring to be worthwhile. cue the dancing nuns. with Richard Pryor for some reason. 2/5
Sometimes Aunt Martha Does Dreadful Things 1971
what is it with Florida and horror cheapies? looking like a sort of perverted tv sitcom, it’s a freakshow spoof with drugs, beaches, babes, psychos in and out of drag and an a-z score. sundrenched, dull and beyond ludicrous, it would make a “good” triple bill with “A Scream In The Streets” and “Miss Leslie’s Dolls.” despite the laughs and gaining some momentum in a twisted final act, it’s not lurid or committed enough to be worth the time of anyone other than perhaps a few special interest groups. 1.5/5
Son of Dracula 1943
Lon Chaney jr is Alucard (get it?) in this mild entry that’s a bit on the cheap but good sets and excellent lighting make it go down easy. other than some nice transformations and a smoky coffin there aren’t too many chills and Chaney doesn’t project much menace but if you’re in the mood it’ll do. an anemic 3/5
Sorority Kill 1974
a host of pre-stars in this tv movie home invasion “suspense” tale of three fugitives who hole up on a college campus during break. maybe in its time it was more thrilling but now it’s low rent, clumsy and obvious. with Anthony Geary, Larry Wilcox, Dick Van Patten, Nicholas Hammond, JoAnna Cameron and more. 2/5
Speak No Evil 2022
is there a genre called comically uncomfortable horror? a mother, father and daughter accept an invitation to stay with less than casual acquaintances. this turns out to be not such a great idea. mostly excellent tense drama had me until seemingly intelligent people suddenly made idiotic decisions. although it doesn’t hold up to light of day scrutiny, this extremely harsh wtf thriller is equally humorous and frustrating with a terrific score and sound design. 3/5
Spirala/The Spiral 1978
a depressed man walks away from his life and up a snowy mountain but not before rubbing locals (and the viewer) the wrong way. stylish but offputting fantasy is well filmed with gorgeous locations that are nicely utilized. the film is a bit trippy but the mc is too abrasive for its own good. a diverting but unsatisfying 2.5/5
Splendor In The Grass 1961
Inge written, Kazan directed drama about repressed, smothering adults and the younger generation who suffer. despite the fact that no one looks high school age, the cast is uniformly excellent, especially Barbara Loden as the rebellious “modern woman” daughter Ginny. although it’s a bit difficult for this era’s viewers to relate to hormonally crazed teens and their parents who are all but caricatures, the film is moving and expertly made. 3.5/5
The Spook Who Sat By the Door 1973
the CIA needs to diversify so they enlist a token black agent who later uses his special training to start a race war. tho the script was co written by Sam Greenlee, the author of the original novel, apparently the film is less violent but still very powerful albeit with a rushed ending. otherwise an effective, fairly low budget production that manages the bigger setpieces well, it’s got solid performances and music by Herbie Hancock. with Lawrence Cook and J.A. Preston. directed by Ivan Dixon. 3/5
Stacey 1973
Anne Randall is the titular race car driving private eye in this sludge that gets off to a rollicking start but stalls out and never recovers. some laughs for sure but otherwise a poorly captured mix of sleaze, red paint, unconvincing shootouts, tedium, manufactured narrative and lotsa racetrack ambience. with horny folks foolin around to horny music, a totally professional theme song, top notch voice overs and plenty of boobies adding up to not much fun. I guess a race car and helicopter means it was ambitious if nothing else. featuring Anitra Ford, Christina Raines and Stewart Moss. 1.5/5
Stark Fear 1962
strange soapy cheapie about Ellen, the wife of dirtbag bully Gerry, that ?tries? to examine the nature of abusive relationships but mostly winds up being an exploitative regional curiosity. probably shocking (or expecting to be) when it was made, it plays like a psa or a sleazy tv movie with star Beverly Garland either being raped, slapped around, degraded or, at best, optically undressed by almost every man who sees her. soaked in cheap gin and dingy motel rooms, there’s an extremely ill fitting score, mysterious narration and plenty of low budget weirdness to soften the ugliness but it’s all too corny to take seriously. 2/5
Starship Invasions 1977
(faded p+s) Christopher Lee and Robert Vaughn star in “space” crap that blasts your hopes for it being the entertaining kind of bad, puny human, because this preposterously scored rubbage about flying pie tins and aliens that look like an aerobics squad that visits high schools is too lame even for kids. if you were drunk and sleepy enough it has moments of competence that might make it seem like you fell asleep to an actual movie. if it were heavily edited and processed into a sort of “Sin City” graphic novel thing it might work. or if it were made into a radio play it might seem a lot more interesting than this version since the audio side is pretty decent. of course, tossing it into a furnace would be an improvement too, but then none of us foolish enough to watch it would have gotten our chuckles. with ridiculousness at every turn but a smart eye toward the international market, the half with Vaughn isn’t too awful and the film even manages some good visuals now and then. the half with Lee is mostly silly and rotten while the whole is muddled and poorly paced. 2/5 for the yuks.
Stay Hungry 1975
Jeff Bridges, Sally Field and tons more faces star in an oddball drama about weightlifting, watersports, bluegrass and other pursuits. though it’s amusing and enjoyably sincere, there’s unfortunate narration in a meandering script that’s perhaps too oblique for its own good. 2.5/5
Stick It In Your Ear 1970
b+w no budget nudie follows free loving, drug using young people for no one’s interest or entertainment. most of the “sex scenes” achieve previously unimagined levels of non eroticity especially when paired with unsettling orchestral accompaniment. although thoroughly poor, this wannabe ?social drama? manages a few scant moments that approach horror. otherwise tedious with awful voiceover “dialog,” it serves best as a time capsule of a bygone era with an often effective score. 2/5 for the effort even if I don’t know what they were attempting.
Stone Cold Dead 1979
Canadian crime drama sees Richard Crenna as a cop chasing a sniper who kills prostitutes and Paul Williams as a pimp. that should have been enough but the suspense barely registers and while the killer’s weapon is definitely unique there’s too much blah blah smothering everything. it’s almost two films in one and neither are very good. the score is similarly split except one of them is quite effective. otherwise it’s all decently photographed in varied locations. btw, the title should’ve been “Photo Shoot.” with Belinda Montgomery. 2/5
Stopmotion 2023
a young filmmaker finds her muse after her mother has a stroke in this British chiller. the stop motion film within is quite creepy and the sound design is effectively unsettling as star Aisling Franciosi’s world unravels. the animation recalls the Quay brothers and Svankmajer while the story incorporates psychological and body horror. it also goes to places I felt were not only unearned but unnecessary as well. still, it’s extremely morbid and increasingly unpleasant with rotting meat, gruesome puppets and plenty of blood. fun stuff! 3/5
Strawberries Need Rain 1970
Larry Buchanan oddness exudes horror from practically every faded frame even if the story keeps getting in the way. Monica Gayle is a young woman who asks the grim reaper to wait another day in order to experience a little life. the low budgetness was never more double edged than here as it gives as much as it takes away. still, the sight of old man death chasing Gayle with a scythe was chuckle worthy. the almost entirely unwanted score could be stripped and with some hefty edits this could succeed as the supernatural fantasy it might’ve been. as it stands, it’s “Alice In Wonderland” meets “The Seventh Seal” by way of Andrew Wyeth. plus boobies. with some fine locations and a hilarious Franz. 2.5/5
Summer Children 1965
b+w drama about young people on a boating trip plays like a Euro drive-in beach movie about a fickle female and the two very different males who pursue her. besides trippy sex scenes, plenty of dancing and the lovely Valora Noland, there’s excellent photography especially the night scenes sur la plage. a moody 3/5
Summerfield 1977
a newly hired schoolteacher gets drawn into the fate of his predecessor and homelife of one of their students in this Australian mystery. a bit slow with a clumsy ending but great atmosphere, gorgeous scenery, an effective score and a good cast make up for it. 3/5
Sunburst aka Slashed Dreams 1975
rancid junk with awful songs about young people who run into redneck trouble in the woods. literally rebranding this a Robert Englund movie with a horror title doesn’t make it any scarier- while certainly ugly there’s no suspense or blood, the only things getting murdered are your ears, and the only corpse is the quarter assed (thank you “Bob’s Burgers”) script. cheap doesn’t necessarily bother me but this is the talky, dull and lame kind of cheap. otherwise Kathrine Baumann emerges unscathed and there’s some nice scenery. with jock jerk/budding psycho Marshall, Rudy Vallee for some reason and good bear footage. 2/5 because it was at least coherent.
Supernatural 1933
an unsettling opening score precedes an odd extended montage as we’re introduced to Carol Lombard’s convicted murderer Roma. she exacts revenge on a con man spiritualist in a (duh) supernatural thriller that’s a bit low rent but decently filmed on nice sets like the ?bird solarium? and the rainy terrace. not essential but does the trick. 3/5
Swallow 2019
or: can you blame her? a troubled young woman takes to, yup, swallowing things after she marries into money and not much else. hard to watch glimpse into the mind of someone of two horrific worlds: her past and her present. Haley Bennett is amazing in the role, conveying every emotion under the sun and every one of them palpable and affecting. it’s an outstanding performance. the script is efficient, everything looks great, the score is always appropriate and the rest of the cast is good but Bennett is the film. a tense gut punch that rewards with a bravura performance that grabs hold and never stops pulling. 4/5 for Bennett at the very least.
The Swinging Cheerleaders 1974
low rent semi dramatic t&a fare from Jack Hill with plenty of nudity and horny students (and faculty) still spends too much time jabbering and being preposterous to be much fun or even offensive. well, except for often leering and glossing over sexual assault for laughs. an undercover journalist joins the college cheerleading squad and finds more than a story. with a weird “seduction” and subsequent “sex scene” (complete with lovely acoustic guitar accompaniment) and a creepy, totally undeserving schmuck who at least gets part of what’s coming to him. starring Colleen Camp and Cheryl “Rainbeaux” Smith. 2/5

T

Tajemství hradu v Karpatech/Mysterious Castle In The Carpathians 1981
fanciful Czech yarn with a very good cast sees an enigmatic opera singer lure men to the haunted title in a ruins. this steampunk fairy tale is creative, colorful and funny, featuring extensive sets and natural locations. it’s also a bit pedestrian in its lighting and presentation, but definitely more good than bad overall so an easy 3/5
Taken 3 2014
taken to the cleaners, taken for a fool, take a powder, take a dirtnap, take off, ay? the only thing this franchise has left to take is your time. Neeson has a “skill set?” ok but since when did that include silently closing car doors, being invisible, and unhittable by bullets whether they come from the guns of police, FBI or gangsters? poorly written and over edited. 2/5
Tales of the Third Dimension 1984
(yt w/ very rough cuts) poor/watchable comedy horror anthology affecting an oldtime feel works more than it doesn’t mostly thanks to the score. the film also knows what it is and does well with what it’s got despite the comedy often undermining potential creepiness. otherwise the tales manage some decent cinematography, sets and atmosphere in a classic case of good production turning deficiencies into strengths. it’s far from perfect- the forced comedy, weak acting, lax editing, inconsistent lighting, obvious sound loops and reliance on closeups are minuses- but if they had more money it might’ve been pretty good. here there be vampires, grave robbers and child endangerment. 3/5
Telefon 1977
talky Don Siegel directed cold war actioner about brainwashed agents turned terrorists ala “The Manchurian Candidate.” star Charles Bronson has a usefully photographic memory while Lee Remick as his counterpart is pretty much useless as written other than those gorgeous eyes. filmed in full bland mode typical of the time with soft image, muffled audio, bad hair and ugly cars. the explosions are good but other than a few moments the movie is not. pure meh with Donald Pleasence and Tyne Daly. 2.5/5
There Was A Little Girl aka Madhouse 1981
a woman fears her birthday because she’s terrorized by her institutionalized sister in this cheesefest that’s not just poorly scored, it’s mis scored as well. characters behave less than illogically and there’s an ineffective cartoon vibe to the over the top violence and “scary” laughter. very definitely not good but grim as hell, soaked in early ’80s color and lighting and lotsa blood. you’ll find laughs and plenty of horror elements but too much wasted potential. the scenes with Julia and her deaf students are the best parts. if you’re a completist or hard up for the era it’s almost good enough. Helen is hot but not for long, there’s a really bad dog and an even worse birthday party. be warned of possible cruelty to a cat- I didn’t look too closely. 2/5
They Made Me A Fugitive aka I Became A Criminal 1947
noirish British crime drama about a poor bloke who can’t stop finding trouble features terrifically moody b+w photography and smoking femmes fatales. unfortunately all that goodness is offset by big lugs who literally kick women when they’re down and an overall not so thrilling presentation. only 3/5
The Thing 2011
1982’s “The Thing” prequel that’s about as imaginative as its title suffers from some less than convincing sets, drunken camerawork, plot holes you can fly the alien vessel thru, a telegraphing script, characters gaping when they should be running and is missing Stan Winston’s amazing practical effects. these are a decent mix of real and cgi that fare better in the chaotic scenes and perhaps looked more impressive when it was released. at least it mostly moves fine and has good sound design, color and lighting with nighttime exteriors and fires looking especially vibrant. there’s also the lovely Mary Elizabeth Winstead who plays a biologist or a structural engineer or something so that doesn’t hurt. 2.5/5
This Side of the Law 1950
a vagrant is hired to impersonate a missing millionaire only to find fooling everyone the least of his problems in this shadowy mystery. the mansion and its grounds make a fine setting, there are excellent outdoor night scenes and some neat if not entirely convincing vfx. well written with a good cast including Kent Smith and a vampy Janis Paige. a solid 3/5
Through the Looking Glass 1976
what kind of porno is ruined by the porn? one that might’ve made a decent horror movie were it not so intent on being a “shocking” porno. certainly more a Euro artsy horror with x rated moments than an x rated porno with horror moments, the film is well shot and unnervingly scored. unfortunately it’s also as obsessed with incestual abuse as its mc, Catherine (played by Catharine Burgess, who is referred to at least once as Mrs. Burgess). extreme ickiness abounds in this could’ve been horror but the real problem is that darn porn. too bad two different movies weren’t shot at the same time: a porno with terrific production values and an r rated horror movie about a haunted mirror and the terrors on its other side. the film’s best performed scene is also its most vile and the (thankfully few) hardcore shots add nothing that couldn’t have been portrayed in non explicit ways, while the performance art aspects of the less palatable “hellish” sequences make them ripe for editing as well. as is, 2.5/5
Thunderbolts* 2025
a good cast does well with what’s basically a violent but not gory variant on the proven Disney/Pixar story of finding family wherever you need it. the humor isn’t forced and the engagement is real- that alone is a milestone these days- but it also has a sense of human beings interacting instead of just acting and the illogical quotient is low. an easy 3/5
Tilbury 1987
wtf weird Icelandic tv movie about a wtf weird folktale resembles Svankmajer by way of Cronenberg with its food/body obsessions. Kafka-ish horror features cursing in English, swimming, dancing and bared female breasts to go along with all the green goo. a weird as hell 3/5
The Time Travelers 1964
mis scored yarn about three scientists who accidentally open a time portal seems a decade too late even for silly pulp like this. while it’s certainly cheesey, it’s mid grade cheese- the vfx and sets were good and the androids’ heads were creepy but the mutants looked goofy. and that score! simply pressing mute at key moments upped the sci fi and made some scenes feel sinister. as is, with just enough chuckles and a decent ending it’s not awful if you’re in the mood. 2/5
To agistri aka The Hook 1976
Greek mystery about a married woman and her lover plotting to kill her husband at sea is more like a slow boat to China but eventually lives up to its name. good locations and Barbra Bouchet are almost enough but it’s basically a tv movie spiced up with a little sex. 2.5/5
Tobenai chinmoku aka Silence Has No Wings 1966
mostly well shot but only intermittently engaging series of loosely connected vignettes surrounding a butterfly. meandering but visually interesting and manages a few affecting moments. with Mariko Kaga. 2.5/5 ymmv
Todesschüsse am Broadway aka Broadway’s Deadly Gold 1969
(faded, dubbed) mid budget German crime procedural about the search for a dead man’s gold has a fair score and varied locations including NYC and Las Vegas. it tries to be a worldly actioner but it’s mostly corny and confined tho a bit naughty if not sleazy with loads of scantily dressed beauties including Heidy Bohlen. otherwise mediocre dialog includes “I wanna learn how to do striptease but in a pleasant way.” 2.5/5
Tomb Raider 2018
serviceable adventure has good production values with eye candy locations and setpieces and mostly looks great while the effective score and sound design compensate for a by the numbers cheesy villain script. there’s some attempted drama but it works best as a globetrotting actioner with mystical mumbo jumbo and a fine shipwreck. a good enough 3/5
Too Late For Tears 1949
Dan Duryea wants his money back no matter what in this noir about a woman and a suitcase. too bad he’s like most everyone else- not smart enough. tough and slick. 3/5
Too Scared To Scream 1982
Mike Connors is Lt. Dinardo, from homicide, in this poor NYC set thriller that plays like a sleazy tv movie with nudity and a little gore. cheaply filmed and lit, it’s filled with lousy “jokes,” awful music, ugly clothes, bad hair and makeup but not a whiff of suspense or plausibility. Ian McShane’s Vincent is at least enjoyable as the gentleman doorman and the introduction to his mother is the film’s only unnerving scene. a few unintentional laughs but not nearly enough although they do increase as things progress. best line: “Freeze or I’ll blow your ass away,” accent on ass. with Anne Archer and other familiar faces. 2/5
To prosopo tis Medousas/The Face of Medusa 1967
(washed out, dubbed) experimental Greek film within a film is also half a porno within a film with a bizarre score. what passes for a story on a sundrenched island sees young people’s actions interrupted by the slate of a film crew, reducing everything to disjointed cuts. somebody dies, there’s an interminable “sex scene” and lots of shuffling about. except for the adorable Hara Angelousi “Vortex” the song is probably the best thing about this. a kind 1.5/5
Tormented 1960
weird’n’cheap beach thriller about standup guy Tom and his late former lover who may or may not be haunting him. if anyone deserved to be haunted it’s this creep who inexplicably has more than his share of lady friends. must be his jazz piano skills. not terrible but would’ve been a lot better (read: creepier) without the brash score. why do a lot of this era’s b-movie “shockers” seem to take place seaside? and who has a blind housekeeper? what? I can’t hear you over the roaring surf. 2.5/5
Torture Garden 1967
Robert Bloch penned horror anthology sees five carnival goers pay extra to see something truly terrifying: their own possible futures. I’m a fan of Bloch but perhaps these ideas worked better as short stories; as a film it’s a bit stagey and poorly paced but the cast and sets are good. Burgess Meredith plays the barker Dr. Diablo. 2.5/5
Touch Me Not aka The Hunted 1972
(brutally cropped, faded, dark) my Lee Remick deep dive has led to this rarity where she plays a troubled woman targeted by a psycho. there’s something about oil tankers and surveillance but a cheap, tvm quality undermines the proceedings. Remick did what she could and I can watch her in almost anything but there’s a reason this is hard to find: it’s obvious, takes forever to get going, the unbelievability factor high, the script misguided and the final act not very suspenseful. however, a decent ending almost makes up for it and Remick looks great once she finally lets her hair down. with a fabulous to behold Ingrid Garbo. a could’ve been way better 2.5/5
Towing 1978
posits that towing epitomizes the worst of capitalism: just another instance of the man keeping us down. or it tries to do for the towing industry what “Carwash” did: glamorize the unglamorous by speaking directly to the people. ok, I tried. the only reasons to watch this cheap, goofy crap are the vintage Chicago scenery and the soundtrack: hilariously pervasive, too often script-replacing songs and funky as hell incidental music. practically useless curiosity has racism, snipers, hookers, shoddy audio and bowling. and multiple personalities: cheesy soap, preposterous farce, beyond lame “action/crime” flick and love story. the cast is certainly not stellar but they’re good enough, especially Sue Lyon and Jennifer Ashley, and there are a few well lit scenes despite most of the film looking like recycled pornstock. on the plus side there is a good towing mishap with an equally amusing reaction. with a young Joe Montegna before he found his voice. 2/5
Toys Are Not For Children 1972
holy wtf did I just watch? make that unholy! with an opening that could clear not only a Times Square porno theater in record time but all of NYC itself, this is one seriously disturbing movie. what in f%$&’s name possessed anyone to even think of this story, let alone actually film it? and I question not only tubi for offering it but myself for sitting thru it. the brain melting mix of ultra ickiness, low budget hilarity, weirdo characters (even the supposedly normal ones), a heartbreaking sadness, over the top exploitative melodrama, the ugly reality of childhood trauma and parental failings manifesting in the children makes for a thankfully unique experience. definitely ranks “up there” among the most only-in-the-’70s oddities of the 1970s. the plot? yikes. to be as delicate as possible, an emotional child in a woman’s body finds solace in the dolls her absentee father sends her every year. despite the fact that she’s now twenty. star Marcia Forbes apparently never acted again and who can blame her? this role would’ve put off both Vincent Price and John Carradine from acting forever. I literally stopped this twice to try to verify her age but could find no info beyond her name. although extremely attractive, one can’t help but feel like a pervert just looking at her. she is so devastatingly vulnerable and confused that watching her get manipulated, screamed at and worse is very difficult. the flashback scenes are particularly troubling. shaking your head wanting to cry while you get the sleaze willies is not an enjoyable experience. with a pimp who looks like Nicholas Cage doing Ricky Ricardo by way of Elvis and plenty of shots of vintage toys that unfortunately I couldn’t recognize. my tv needed to be hosed down after this. my eyes? they’ll never be the same. 3/5? 1/5? sorry, impossible to tell.
T.R. Baskin 1971
Candice Bergen is T.R., a young woman disillusioned after moving from Ohio to Chicago. the film jumps thru time and changes perspectives but is never offputting. instead, the unorthodox rhythm seems to fit the mc and her sense of being lost in the big city. sad and funny, it also stars Peter Boyle and James Caan. low key and affecting if not exactly enlightening. 3/5
Trick ‘r Treat 2007
not very good blend of horror and comedy fails the way all similar films do by leaning too far into the comedy end of the haunted lake. this one has a fair amount of good old fashioned shocks tho, the twists are decent and it’s capable of some very fine nighttime photography so all in all not too bad. 2.5/5
Trilogia de terror 1968
b+w Brazilian anthology is a mixed bag of broad touches and opaque storytelling. and bearded topless women. lots of people doing ugly things but not a morsel of apprehension let alone terror. the often strange music and sometimes effectively surreal imagery works here and there but the film’s also clumsy and experimental to the point of comedy. despite the murders, the first segment was about as scary as a pair of socks and not a little sleazy. the second tale takes advantage of some fine locations but adds politics and people making weird noises with their mouths. even with the gore, there’s nothing scary here except maybe the soldier in the jungle. the third story at least travels to a galaxy adjacent to terror, opening with a trippy nightmare sequence but soon degrading into someone relieving virgins of their clothes via a whip. dull and more concerned with social horrors than the spooky kind which wasn’t to my liking. 2/5
The Trollenberg Terror aka The Crawling Eye 1958
atmospheric b+w British tale sees a mysterious cloud, disappearing hikers and a psychic come together in the snowy mountains. the giant eyeballs are weird and kinda creepy if a bit goofy. overall, the film isn’t exactly thrilling or essential but certainly watchable. with Forrest Tucker. 3/5
Troubled Waters 1964
a real dick ex con comes to live with his girlfriend and their son in this b+w downer drama. it’s got one of those over the top villains you want to see killed by the innocent victim and it doesn’t delve much deeper than that. “Cape Fear” this ain’t. 2.5/5 for the gleeful performance by Tab Hunter.
The Trouble With Angels 1966
Hayley Mills squares off against Rosalind Russell in this comedy about a catholic girls’ school and two new troublemakers. it’s funny not treacly and the fine cast delivers excellent performances. a smart script manages to have it both ways- the young girls are mischievous but not overtly disrespectful while the nuns are thankfully not simply one note characters, allowing each their due. typical of the era are too many broad touches like heavy handed musical cues but nothing fatal. otherwise well filmed with good sets and plenty of color. damn if I didn’t tear up at the end too. 3.5/5
Truckin’ Man aka Trucker’s Woman 1975
(faded, dirty) a trucker’s son too old to be called a college boy takes up long haulin’ to investigate daddy’s death in this ridiculous cheapo crap that’s unfortunately too earnest for its own good, often coming across like a driver’s ed film. altho that may be due to the high school classroom doubling as a police station. it’s got loads of vintage interiors, great gangsters, hilarious dustups, Diesel Joe, sadsack mopes, pretty women, lots of truckin, car chases, songs that probably inspired “Walk Hard” and a stalk-assault that’s romantically scored with tender dialog. but there’s not enough of anything worthwhile for the average viewer unless they’re into ’70s big rigs, truck stops, restaurants and slow movies with amateur hour acting/country music soundtracks. a solid 2.5/5 for the yuks.
Truck Stop Women 1974
wow what a start! it’s the Jewish mafia against Uncle Leo and company as Claudia Jennings and her mom run the hottest spot to get a “trucker’s special.” hint: it isn’t a slice of pie with a scoop of ice cream. then the script gets in the way. despite all the hijinx, tough talk, gun shooting and agreeable drive in cred, it still manages to drag way too often. plenty of nudity (including one spectacular young lady given her very deserving due) but otherwise too much truckin’ with bad songs and terrible overdubbed dialog. otoh, who can forget classic truckers’ hits like the title track and “Bull Shippers?” fun and trashy but not enough. 2.5/5
Two For The Seesaw 1962
Robert Mitchum and Shirley MacLaine are two strangers finding, using and ultimately helping each other. they’re both excellent, as is the script, even as it manages to go places you’d rather it didn’t. though the score is a bit dated, the film is very well shot. 3.5/5

U

Una gota de sangre para morir amando aka Murder In A Blue World 1973
(dubbed) Spanish/French futuristic “thriller” reminds of “A Clockwork Orange” and “Fahrenheit 451” but is not as interesting, funny or stylish as either tho it does have Sue Lyon. she’s fine and looks good in scenes ranging from British counterculture to Rollin-esque. too bad everyone else looks as bored as you’ll be trying to watch this. other than some stabbings they forgot to bother with a plot, aspiring to shock instead but the film is too disjointed to generate anything. it’s also too banal to hold your interest despite being decently filmed which is the real problem. 2.5/5
Una rata en la oscuridad/A Rat In The Dark 1979
(faded) dull and cheap Mexican thriller about sisters who buy a haunted house has a few moments but they’re way too few and far between. with a hit or miss score, a lot of audible hiss, rat ?chirpings?, less than erotic nudity and Milligan level awkward sex scenes, there isn’t much time devoted to anything like suspense. besides, no amount of flying objects can justify the “twist.” 2/5
The Undead 1957
an unfortunate introduction gets this strange Corman job going with an oddball story about very unscrupulous ?doctors? who hypnotize a fallen woman. why? to try to tap into her past lives, of course. goofy claptrap about reincarnation, destiny, witches and satan ensues. the film does a decent job of creating the appropriate atmosphere with fair sets and lighting and a good score but this production would’ve benefited greatly from some Castle energy. it’s also leaden with wannabe Shakespearean dialog and begs the question why tell a medieval love story in such a roundabout way? it’s different, sure, but different doesn’t always equal good. maybe Roger wanted to do a sci fi movie and got stuck with a script he monkeyed with. 2.5/5
The Underground Man 1974
tv movie about a private eye played by Peter Graves who gets mixed up in a custody battle before facing thugs and secretive locals. and Fritz. the sometimes intrusive score distracts but a few suspenseful moments and effective flashback sequences make up for it. lots of familiar faces like Jo Ann Pflug, Jack Klugman, an unhinged Jim Hutton and a freaked out Kay Lenz. a very slight 3/5
Un maledetto imbroglio 1959
Italian police procedural of a cop investigating two murders in the same building is twisty but talky, a bit soapy and less than thrilling. well filmed with good use of locations, it’s also got the lovely Claudia Cardinale and Eleonora Rossi Drago. a thin 3/5
Un reve plus long que la nuit/A Dream Longer Than The Night 1978
this very odd fantasy about a girl who dreams of growing up is sometimes effective but often clumsy and more than a little icky. excellent sets and an imaginative narrative adhere to the subconscious flow but there are too many penises and her older brother is seriously creepy. think a pervy “Alice In Wonderland” with stylized “sex scenes” (as in full frontal nudity but not much more) utilizing everything from hay and feathers to steampunk “toys.” and exploding papier mache phalluses. who, what, where, when and why? because it’s a ’70s French movie. 2/5

V

Valley of the Dolls 1967
this lush rendition of the novel about the evils of show business and dolls (pills) looks so good it’s practically edible. considering the material the cast does well and except for Patty Duke manages to avoid caricature. a pill popping Patty rides the doll party headfirst into a detox clinic with her extremes related in all their glory, the highlights being the torture tub, her duet reunion with Tony and her alleyway breakdown. lots of big hair, big attitude, bad behavior and life lessons. with Martin Milner, Sharon Tate and a scrumptious Barbara Parkins. 2.5/5
Vedreba aka The Plea 1967
powerfully scored odd Russian film apparently based on ancient poems tells the story of soldiers in an ethnic war. tho most of the film seemed impenetrable, especially the narrated sections which recall the silent era or stage plays, its more existential moments transcend culture. the b+w photography was a mixed bag- some scenes were striking, others washed out- while the stylized sections ranged from haunting to puzzling. warning: contains animal sacrifices. I can’t say I understood or enjoyed it but it was interesting and well made so 3/5
The Velvet Touch 1948
Rosalind Russell plays an actress who uses her fame to get away with murder. everything looks good with terrific sets and shadows and it plays great with smart dialog. both the direction and cast are top notch including Sydney Greenstreet. an easy 3.5/5
Viridiana 1961
beautifully shot and typically fetishy Bunuel story of a mad uncle and his soon to be converted niece is quite strange. an extremely unhealthy and disturbing setup turns into a struggle of good against evil; human kindness versus human weakness. the film seems to cast religion (and faith) aside as mere drops in the ocean, as futile as any minor endeavor when faced with the enormity of existence. the beggars Viridiana tries to help in her attempts to find good in tragedy are displayed first as poor souls, then scoundrels, next a grotesque parody of the last supper before finally murderous, rendering the lost nun’s generosity meaningless. she was right to want to stay in the convent. 3/5
The Visit 2015
two kids spend a week with their grandparents whom they’ve never met and find more than a huge generation gap. creates tension and becomes fairly creepy but the young stars’ reactions are unrealistic as if the director wanted the kids to be in a grownup’s movie rather than letting events unfold thru their eyes. dark and strange but gimmicky and not as invested in its own horror as it should’ve been. 2.5/5
The Vulture 1966
(cropped in crappy color) silly, boring tale of a birdman is about as scary as a teacup. or a feather. hopefully better in b+w, it’s dull and amateurish but has a few (unintentional) laugh out loud moments and Diane Clare to help soothe the pain. 2/5

W

Wait Until Dark 1967
very well filmed thriller’s structure means it’s unevenly paced but most of it is good enough to compensate. Audrey Hepburn stars as a resourceful blind woman drawn into a deadly search for a missing doll. lead creep Alan Arkin gets the best lines but it’s an especially cold Richard Crenna who sells them. I found Hepburn’s character needlessly needy and her reunion with Gloria a missed opportunity to show she no longer requires hubby’s praise. an imperfect 3/5
The Walking Dead 1935
it’s back to the bolts for old Boris as he plays a three time loser in this interesting but largely pedestrian thriller with an obvious script. even though it feels like one missed opportunity after another it’s not a total loss- Karloff is good and it’s nice to see him get a chance to just act without heavy makeup or prosthetics, there are a few shadowy scenes and some great Jimmy lines. short but not so sweet. 2.5/5
Wanda 1970
an unhappy woman walks away from her husband and kids only to wind up with an abusive thief. written, directed by and starring Barbara Loden, it’s a cramped and grimy study of a lonely misfit drifting aimlessly thru mining towns in search of purpose. a sad 3/5
Welcome Home Brother Charles 1975
whoa. ugly, cheap, weird stuff about a wronged man and the singular way he exacts revenge is part blaxploitation and part tentacle horror porn. in addition, there’s domestic drama, white male inadequacy and a funky soundtrack to go along with the violent misogyny and a “sex scene” featuring an otherwise fine actress who must’ve been a virgin who learned about sex from adult Disney fanfiction. either that or she took questionable direction very well. although bizarrely interesting, the film’s unfocused and a failure as horror or drama leaving it a fairly dull if icky curiosity for most of its running time. 2.5/5 for the imagination.
Who Killed Teddy Bear 1965
with a downbeat but groovy title song, soft focus, scummy characters and oodles of unseemliness, this odd, low budget mix of ’60s melodrama and sleaze is apparently American but sure seems British. a hostess in a dance club gets obscene phone calls, attracting yet more unwanted attention in the form of an eager policeman. with lots of dancing, it often feels like a tv movie despite its carnality and peepshow loitering but it’s an ugly tv that would air this. similar to “Geissel des fleiches” but far less pandering. with Sal Mineo, Juliet Prowse, Elaine Stritch and more. despite the seemingly tacked on ending, 3/5 for what it is.
Wild River 1960
a man working for the TVA tries to clear the last residents from an area planned for flooding in a period drama starring Montgomery Clift and Lee Remick. beautiful locations and photography evoke a real sense of time and place, the script while reductive is good and Remick’s longing is palpable. 3/5
Windows 1980
Talia Shire and Elizabeth Ashley are weird as the woman assaulted in her NY apartment and the friend who offers help. hardly logical tale of paranoia, loneliness and madness has music from an arthouse softcore and some local flavor but aside from the leads the cast is uninspired. low key with little to no suspense but some style and a few effective moments almost save this floundering would be psychological mystery. 2.5/5
Witchcraft 1964
low budget but atmospheric British thriller about desecrated graves finds creepiness in some well lit scenes and Yvette Rees as the witch. she doesn’t do much but lurk and move very slowly but her eyes are riveting. with a waning Lon Chaney Jr and the adorable Diane Clare, it’s just good enough. 3/5

X

Xie aka Hex 1980
close but no cigar Shaw brothers spookshow sees… wait for it (you’ll never guess)… yup, a wronged woman come back from the dead for vengeance! has its moments but poorly structured and too often takes the comical approach with cartoonish gore and typical buffoonery. pretty bad but some atmosphere, well chosen nudity and a decent start help. 2.5/5
Xtro 1982
a stunning young Maryam d’Abo is the only reason to watch this videogame scored cheapfest where a fully grown man washes the placental fluid off of himself after being born on the floor of some poor woman’s bathroom. see, there is a bright light at the beginning of the movie and a long, humorous, attempted animation sequence depicting a vessel crashing on earth so I guess a man who was abducted by aliens returns years later for some reason or other. maybe he saw how beautiful Maryam got while he was gone. nowadays he likes to huff natural gas and eat fresh snake eggs so who can say. the gore/body horror special fx were poor but enjoyably so however the living toys were creepy if not exactly explained. scores points for the melty bon voyage and gooey ending. 2.5/5

Y

Yashagaike aka Demon Pond 1979
gorgeously filmed fantasy sees a pond princess bound by an ancient promise long for love. a very odd mix of theatrical spectacle, creative vfx and spooky legends come together to create this long but enjoyable film. eye candy setpieces stuffed with bizarre, colorful characters, great locations and beautiful lighting make up for the uneven pacing. 3/5
Yinyang jie aka Blood Reincarnation 1974
(grotesque multi subtitled print off yt) would be fortune seekers unknowingly unleash carnage, a cheating couple get freaky and a wronged doctor returns home but the clock is ticking in these wacky Hong Kong horror tales. uneven, not very good and imdb lists it as almost four minutes longer so it’s possible a lot was cut out of this version. half star for the third segment; skipping the first two is always an option. 2.5/5
Yonimo kimyo na monogatari – Eiga no tokubetsu hen aka Tales of the Unusual 2000
(subtitled) low budget but earnest collection of sci fi, fantasy and horror tales starts off with a chilly bang about freezing crash survivors. the other segments were more light hearted (and romantic) which wasn’t to my liking, although the chess-centric one at least had interesting visuals. 2.5/5
Yu mian fei hu aka The Silver Fox 1968
mostly subdued Shaw brothers yarn about the title woman with a sword to grind is well filmed, using its sets and locations well. it has a lighthearted tone despite the carnage and dad’s creepy mask. the unrealistic parts weren’t the gravity defying martial arts theatrics but that the mc could pass for a man. entertaining and the booby trapped cave was cool. 3/5

Z

Zhizn i udivitelnye priklyucheniya Robinzona Kruzo/The Life and Amazing Adventures of Robinson Crusoe 1973
(dubbed into German) Russian version is well made and looks very good but like all filmed adaptations is inferior. its focus on remaining faithful to the story is to its detriment- most of the nuts and bolts are covered but it’s the viewer left stranded with too little engagement while the score has too much Vivaldi. 2.5/5 yada
Zlate kapradi/The Golden Fern 1963
strikingly photographed Czech fantasy about a horndog jackass and a forest nymph is too long and too much historical war drama for me. maybe I’m just not familiar with the source material but I didn’t enjoy this as much as I wanted to despite a fantastic first act. still, the film looked great in b+w boasting beautiful locations, creative sound design and a strong cast. anything less than 3/5 seems unfair.